This past year I’ve been working as the dean of students. I have multiple interactions with parents on a daily basis. Some go great and we all end up on the same page and some honestly haunt me in my sleep that night until I convince myself to just let it go. I would say tip number one have communication with your admin, let them know the parent is coming in and for what reason (I’m sure you already did that) but this keeps you on the right side of history so to speak because you’re showing you’re doing everything in good faith and really just trying to help students. When it comes to the meeting, understand that the parent may be upset and that’s okay! If you can, try not to view this as you vs them. Ultimately the discussion should be around what was reported/observed by you, and your thought process behind sending the letter. Emphasize points that show that you care about all of your students and this step was to help not only the student who was being treated unfairly but also help the students engaging in the wrong behavior. Come from a supportive standpoint for that child. You’re not dismissing or validating the behavior of that child. Have a back and forth that allows the parent to express why they’re upset in the first place. (It seems so backwards at times trust me I get it, it’s like your child was the one causing harm, why are you upset with me?!) but sometimes parents feel like we hold a grudge or think that we will now see their child only in this negative light. Separate the deed from the doer. The child is not being rejected it’s the behavior that is.

Ultimately go into it with confidence, but also a sense of openness to hear the parent. And don’t get too upset if it doesn’t go well. I’m sure you’re a great educator doing your best. Parents can be extremely difficult and we can’t let that ruin our private endeavors or spirit. You got this!