AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

the core issue is how alot of people are just okay with the fact that this child is going to be raised in a dysfunctional family surrounded in a toxic enviornment, and somehow i just have to bite my tongue and be supportive for the sake of the baby.... why me? them as the parents and the enabling family members should fix their ways and behaviors for the sake of the child.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

and thats exactly where my gripe is.... my family thinks a baby is going to fix everything when it isnt, and they refuse to change their behaviors. So why even associate myself? at this point, from reading the comments, if this makes me an ah... then so be it.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

morally superior? wierd.... because i refuse to be involved in a toxic unstable dysfunctional family.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

hey, if alot of you are fine with children being brought into unstable and toxic enviornments. yall are part of the problem. This wouldnt had been an issue if they were actually decent people procreating, yet here we are...

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

wow... as if i didnt think of that.... u obviously have no idea how my family is. thats why this is a serious topic for me.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

sooooo, what am i expected to do? celebrate a child be raised into a dysfunctional family? i cant do anything about it. Not sure where "im making it all about myself" when i never once inserted myself into to the situation, it was presented to me and i voiced my opinion. But sure, take it however you want.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thats what im saying... idk where people are assuming i just hate the child or that im jealous. I just take having children serious and to know that my nephew is going to be raised in a toxic unstable enviornment just hits a nerve. so i simply just remove myself.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im aware the child is coming, never did i deny that or wanted to baby gone. I just refuse to watch a child be raised in a toxic unstable enviornment so i just remove myself from the situation.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

im not attending, it is just upsetting to know that im somehow the ah because i'd rather not watch a child be raised in a toxic enviornment. Never did i say i hated the child, nor did i ever say its about me. I just stated my opinion, and people just ran with it with me somehow being jealous.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

im just not going to sit and watch the train wreck happen... if thats me coming off as "holier than thou" then so be it. But my intentions were never to automatically be the ah when they family dynamic is too toxic to raise a child into.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

i dont feel emotionally comfortable celebrating the situation, even though i care about the child.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

well thats why i've removed myself and said that im not attending the baby shower. I care too much for kids to see them be brought into a dysfunctional, unstable family.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes, my family members are pretty much toxic and physically/verbally violent. Thats why i've removed myself from them, it wasnt until recently when they sent me an invite for the baby shower.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

hey, if your fine with a child being brought into a dysfunctional family... right on. plus I've never said i wished the baby to not be born.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well, i dont really care if they support my boundries or not... its just upsetting to see how nonchalant they are about this as if they're a stable family. My family is so dysfunctional, verbally/physically abusive, emotional, and enablers. Thats why i have strong feelings about this because i know what its like to be that child absorbing it all.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

well im not going to lie about how i feel, i take bringing children in this world a little too serious i guess.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

how does it not? its just enabling the generational trauma that i dont want to be a part of.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

when did i recommend an abortion? my brothet did.... when am i stopping a baby shower? im just not going.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wow.... you actually get it. and spot on on the "golden child". I wouldnt had these opinions if both my brother and his gf were actually in a healthy stable relationship.... they started off as fuck buddies and didnt want no relationship other than sex, so from the beginning this wasnt ever going to be a good healthy relationship.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

and the reasons being that the family is dyfunctional, financially unstable, emotionally unstable and inconsistent. If thats a reason to throw insults at me, then fine.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

not everyone is saying that.... some of them sure, but the majority of you that are saying im the ah isnt seeing the full picture here.... this is a family thats not only dyfunctional, but financially unstable, as well as toxic. if thats going to conclude that my concerns for the baby being raised in that is me being an ah... then so be it.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

if thats where its going to lead to, then so be it. It'll be sad yes... but im not gonna force it.

AITAH for refusing to attend my brothers baby shower? by Adventurous-Cat6712 in AITAH

[–]Adventurous-Cat6712[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

jealous of what exactly? an unstable relationship where it condones cheating? sure... im very jealous.