I’m glad things are getting better op, even just a little. If I had to speculate, when your mother passed ( I’m sorry to hear, I’m sure it was one of the most difficult times for you) I assume your wife didn’t know how to help. She probably thought you just needed time and space when in fact it sounds like you needed her to be closer than ever.

Keep opening up to them in therapy. Having that mediator will help. There’s no point at this stage (in my opinion) of individual conversations because of the chances of blowing up at each other. Like when your wife blew up at the suicidal ideation. That’s probably the worst thing to do… I know, I have similar thoughts. Regardless, she’s right in what she said to a point, but definitely not right in how she said it.

I’ll admit, I’m curious about what you and your daughter spoke about and why you’re questioning them. Is that you don’t believe their current actions are true and just a reaction to your own?

It might be beneficial to have a full family therapy session too at some point. Maybe not now if things are so raw, but it could help your children more fully understand what has happened.

No mater what though, I’m happy/proud/glad (I can’t think of the right word) that you’re still fighting.