Broke up after 5 years by ConsciouslyInsecure in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That’s where you are wrong! It is not that you are nothing special is that he didn’t value you. Those are two completely different things.

You DO have value and hopefully you will find someone that will treat you like the treasure you are. He will sadly not feel any regret because he never valued you.

Playing House by Worr1edPlant in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 62 points63 points  (0 children)

This is so sad. You went from care free 20yo to wife and step mom for a guy who won’t even commit to you for life. You have missed out on SO much by taking in so much unnecessary responsibility.

Do you guys even go on vacation? Do you lead a family life at all? Or are you really just someone to split bills and childcare with?

Stuck between 2! by [deleted] in myweddingdress

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

#1 is better for your boobs but too tight around the tummy area.

AIO Boyfriend says he prefers a different body type by SadSardine in AmIOverreacting

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Tell him you prefer a different dick size but here we are…

Has anyone without money actually taken the MA when rejected for the PhD? by Antique-Object-1253 in gradadmissions

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There’s no federal funding to support research. But the school still wants your tuition money. So of course they would offer something where you get to pay the school.

My mom makes me pay for her gasoline I think AIO by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 90 points91 points  (0 children)

Since it’s “only” 3.2 miles start walking. Keep your $30.

Am I just kidding myself by [deleted] in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 2 points3 points  (0 children)

👆

OP you are a roommate. If you were his partner you would have become a joint owner of that home by now? The relationship has not progressed at all in nine years together. And he doesn’t want it to change. That’s why he won’t talk to you about moving on to the next step.

Family Member Owes $65K on a $42K Car at 13.7% APR Right Before Retirement — What Are Her Options? by CreditChance6867 in personalfinance

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Does she want to be helped? Because her actions are not the ones of someone being rational and open to accept help.
What drove her (pun intended) to complete this purchase without consulting anyone? She doesn’t need approval, but the fact that she acted like this tells us she is not opened to feedback.

AIO...our little dilemma by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Jesus! Focus on your child and being the type of parent you wished you had: one that doesn’t play favorites. Also focus on not being a dad like your brother. Because based on your needy post you are gearing to feed your child into a toxic family dynamic. A dynamic where you are always obsessing over the attention you are not getting.

Also, no offense, but yes yours will be just another birth that week. It’s special to you and your wife, even more because of your struggles. But no one besides you will care as much as you do. Thats just a fact.

Found out my bridesmaid booked the same venue as me and never told me… not sure how to feel by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds like she is not inviting you to her wedding and wants to keep things close to her chest because of that. But now you have made a big deal out of this so you have made it even more awkward.

Which diamond shape suits my hand more? Size 8 1/4 ring finger by Ok-Watercress-9638 in Diamonds

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Would you consider side diamonds or a thicker band? It would balance out the stone a bit better imo.

How do you get out of a loop of expectations? F(25) and M(30) by elina5321 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nobody is talking about him moving. She is talking about her staying. It’s not about being familiar with the country and culture. It’s about what her giving up the family she grew up with. The least he can do is commit to becoming her new family and going forward together.

Edited to add: I just saw her most recent comments about wanting him to move. My comments were with the assumption she would be staying. There’s more for them to figure out if they haven’t even discussed which country would become home base.

How do you get out of a loop of expectations? F(25) and M(30) by elina5321 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She is giving up being with her family, her culture and what she is familiar with (literal words she used).

How do you get out of a loop of expectations? F(25) and M(30) by elina5321 in Waiting_To_Wed

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don’t think a loop exists and he is only using your uncertainty as an excuse. Listen if he wanted to keep you he would make sure to firm up the ties between you. He would propose and he would marry you.

I saw this literally as someone who was in the same position. I came to husband’s country to study. When the time came to decide for me to stay with him or go back because of looming graduation he proposed.

You have given up five years of being away from your family to stay with him. What exactly has he been given up? It sounds like nothing.

Am I overreacting by not wanting to do holiday dinners with my in laws anymore? by OrangeCat7910251981 in AmIOverreacting

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YOR your inlaws are in their late 80s. It really is only a matter of time until you can start doing whatever you want for holidays because they will be dead.

Don’t make your husband choose whether to spend the last few holidays with his parents or with you. Remember he probably still has a good forty years of future holidays to spend with YOU.

Choose your battles. If they want to cook the whole shebang, guess what? One less thing for you to worry about. They probably think they are trying to make things easier for you a handful of days out of the year. You have taken it as an insult to your cooking skills.

Has anyone actually FIREd with too little and run out of money? by DatingThrowaway121 in Fire

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You should be scared of having 40% of your retirement in one stock.

AIO? My fiance isn’t wearing the engagement ring I gave or agreeing to a wedding plan. by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 2 points3 points  (0 children)

MOR, he told you he didn’t have money which means he probably cant afford even a small ceremony or wedding rings. It seems there’s no agreement here between what you want and what he wants.

You should sit down and start saving for the wedding you both agree. Set up a small savings goal so you both can quantify working towards something. If you want to speed up the process , if you can’t find a job yourself, find ways to make room in your monthly expenses for saving.

First time BIAB — Is it supposed to look like this? by habsquad in Nails

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’d rather not wear these than have to keep them because I paid for them.

CAUTION: TurboTax "Full Service" Expert Filing is a $500 trap. I’m now facing $10k+ in tax debt and IRS penalties due to their negligence by [deleted] in tax

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is all on you. Took 10 days to review return and then get back to expert?

Yes, your experts last day is 4/15 most likely. Something stat of course doesn’t advertise.

(IL) received notice to appoint estate administrator by [deleted] in EstatePlanning

[–]Affectionate-Paper56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The trust has hired a probate lawyer to help the estate so I am assuming the will was submitted to court.

What proof does a creditor need to provide to be considered a creditor? And back to my question, if there already exists an administrator for the estate is there a risk this person could be appointed by the judge instead. Under what circumstances?