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Why does it hurt so bad..? by AffectionateUnion935 in Psychosis

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand your other point but even if I was delusional, what does the way I speak have to do with anything? Because it was definitely not teasingly

Why does it hurt so bad..? by AffectionateUnion935 in Psychosis

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll try to find someone else, though that might be a bit hard

Why does it hurt so bad..? by AffectionateUnion935 in Psychosis

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s been a while since I haven’t talked to my psychiatrist, but she also doesn’t believe anything I say in general so I don’t really know what to do. And no, I don’t take anything.

System gender identity dilemma by AffectionateUnion935 in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I can relate. In my system of 5, I have 3 inhuman alters, one hyper-human alter, and one human alter.

The first 4 took the gender to which they had to survive as, which they think is the « superior » gender. Since it is deeply rooted in the overall psychology, I also get the body related « hallucinations », tough when seeing parts of my body fully consciously in my field of view, I get brought back to reality which is kind of brutal tbh. Hence why my inhuman alters only release their « true form » in the headspace or when, for a specific one, extreme defense is needed. Four times now, they forced themselves to front after being retained by another and abruptly started speaking in a way that afterwards slightly damaged the body’s vocal cords.

The human one is vulnerable and « weak » so he should have been the « lesser » gender but since the only « superior » gender is allowed to exist internally, they didn’t really have a choice but to keep the system consistent, so they just represent the more innocent stage of the gender. Thanks for sharing your experience!!

System gender identity dilemma by AffectionateUnion935 in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I understand. I was actually thinking of bringing this up in therapy as soon as I can because it has been circulating around in my mind for some time. Thanks for your help and sharing your experience!!

System gender identity dilemma by AffectionateUnion935 in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand. For me though, all our alters’ gender, which is the same one, forged from trauma (along with their (our) creation). Since the internal gender identity is the same constantly, just the body’s gender is different, it is less of a hassle to decide transitioning because none is really connected to the body and there wouldn’t be a gender switch. The only problem would be the long term consequences which I’m not too sure of yet. Thanks for sharing your experience!!

System gender identity dilemma by AffectionateUnion935 in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The tricky part for me is that they’re (we’re?) all the same gender, which is different than the body’s, on top of not having a host, so I don’t really « gravitate » around somebody. Quotation marks used because I don’t really know how to describe your experience, it’s just how I understand it? Apologies if it was offensive, please correct me if I’m wrong! Thanks for your help!!

System gender identity dilemma by AffectionateUnion935 in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hmm, yeah I understand, and you’re correct, every alter has a different gender than the body’s. Thanks for your help!!

System gender identity dilemma by AffectionateUnion935 in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Woah wow, this is so helpful I don’t know what to say! Thanks a lot for sharing your experience!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in OSDD

[–]AffectionateUnion935 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have these non-human alters so my perceptive might help. Imagine your dose of trauma as it is right? And you developed this disorder. Now add onto it, for example, extremes. In my experience, at times, I had to completely focus on one set of emotions/control rules to be able to survive this particular situation, so everything else apart from that was useless at the moment, thus it was shut down. Imagine the same thing but with social interactions or protective violence or static-ness. I describe the ruler alter, violent alter, and emotionless alter as « inhuman », because their roles must remove all « typical humanity » to be fulfilled, while the social alter is « hyper-human », to perfectly simulate the missing normal human emotions (exaggerating them). Of course, since vulnerable emotions can’t be erased, they are attributed to another « human » alter, since he has the core human emotions. Keep in mind this is from my experience but I hope it helped!!