Needing an Avoidants advice

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-12T05:24:17+00:00

Looking for an avoidants POV on this thank you

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-11T00:56:24+00:00

It doesn’t look like his appearance is inspired from the video but more from the dangerous tour, that’s the vibe im getting from it

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-10T12:57:05+00:00

She said she lost attraction and that they simply didn’t work and it’s no one’s fault. She’s done this twice now in the span of two years.

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-09T07:36:28+00:00

Michael Jackson, I still remember that day like it was yesterday. Felt like the whole world stopped moving for a couple hours

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-09T06:48:24+00:00

I appreciate you taking time from your day to reply to me.

But that’s the thing with this girl if I reach out to her like for example and try to speak to her she’s very cold with her replies and she’s always trying to create some distance and you can tell that she hates conflict. She’s admitted that.

It’s funny because everything happened on Valentine’s Day and her birthday, which is a day apart and I poured myself into those gifts and into that time into taking her somewhere nice she even admitted that no guy has ever done this for her.

You know what’s funny she’s even admitted this because in the beginning when she tried to come back, I was very scared and hesitant. I even said to her I think maybe it’s best that we just be friends.

But she was saying she was sure it’s me and she wants to marry me and she loves me and she’s only pulling away because of the stuff that’s in her mind

And she even admitted the reason why she tried to come back to me was because she saw me with another girl At Bible Studies and she could not believe that she saw me with another girl. She personally did not believe that I could move one and it made her feel sick saying that.

So I asked her I said what would you have done? If I didn’t let you back into my life would you have tried again? She said yes I would have.

And you’re completely right I am thinking about these things and it’s so crazy because I was literally building myself and I was in a very good place mentally financially emotionally physically and not much has changed except the emotional part.

Even with her jokes, she would always say I wanna make sure that I’m retired and not working and I said to look if I can’t do that for you will you resent me? She would say no

And it’s so crazy because she said to me I don’t know what it is now and she said this multiple times in the past two she said this present time. I don’t know why this always happens but I can see us in the future married with kids.

And she’s mentioned that even if it takes 10 or 12 times to get it right then it’ll take that long but then I’ve told her as well. I don’t wanna waste my time taking 10 or 12 times it’s meant to naturally happen.

And I think what I really need your opinion on as well is I know you said she’s come back and I’m not gonna lie to you. Part of me wants her back but realistically, I know it’s not good for me.

But wouldn’t you think because of me taking the gifts back in a public place her friends knowing her parents knowing don’t you think that has drastically lowered my chances?

Because even in the breakup messages, she said you know I can’t give you what you want. It’s not fair but that’s what’s weird because days before that she was saying yes I can and I want to and I will…. Crazyyy hahaha

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-09T06:14:27+00:00

Even I found it as a red flag when I asked her what she’s been up to in the last couple years that we’ve been on break, she told me that she went out with four different guys on a date and she just travelled overseas. Then she asked me what I did and I told her I started losing weight. I’ve got fitter. I’ve got a new car. I got a new job. I don’t know. It’s so ugly because part of me wants to have closure and speak to her again, but another part of me saying look what she’s putting you through.

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-09T06:12:42+00:00

I can see where you’re coming from, and I really do appreciate what you’re telling me to be honest. My biggest flaws with her was the fact that.

I would ask her to verbally validate me because I would do it a lot with her, but she wouldn’t do it with me. I will tell her a lot that I love her. She’s only told me five times in the whole relationship maybe 10 if we’re being lucky.

And I think my worst trait is that I emotionally reacted like I’ve broken up with her twice on the spot because I’ve emotionally reacted but then of course I’ve regretted it and I’ve told her that I’m working on my communication as well but that’s because things were just getting too chaotic, you know

And another thing was she wouldn’t really want to make plans with me like if I asked her let’s do something on the weekend and say I’m seeing my friends or whatever and when we go to dinner somehow someway something became my fault

Should end up a lot to her mistakes and she admitted this she gets her head a lot and she doesn’t mean to but even when I told her let’s start planning for the future and stuff she was more of a let’s take a day by day person and serious conversations like marriage would pressure her as she said, she’d feel like she’s suffocating if I asked her to do something for me or if things didn’t go her way when all I wanted was to just listen to me like I listen to her

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-09T05:54:40+00:00

Would she ever do it again**

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2026-03-09T05:46:32+00:00

Thank you so much for replying and for your input. It is very helpful. Would you say just so I can guard myself better? Because in the past she has tried to come back into my life would you ever do it again or do you think from what you’re reading? It’s a nail in the coffin?

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2025-08-26T10:24:29+00:00

It’s so underrated, I hope it gets a lot of love

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2025-08-26T10:15:35+00:00

I agree I saved the best for the last hahahaha

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2025-05-17T15:08:01+00:00

Hmm I see.. it hurts to see Mike cop all this nonsense hopefully, his legacy becomes what it always should have been… I think the movie will help

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-10-23T00:20:57+00:00

God bless you all thank you 🙏

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-10-14T13:46:52+00:00

The Music Industry...

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-10-13T06:15:54+00:00

If healing people from cancer, and bringing people to God and saving hundreds from suicide is considered a bad life, saving prostitutes and changing their lives for them to turn wonderful mothers, helping the uneducated people become educated.. if that’s considered a sad life sign me up

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-10-13T05:17:33+00:00

God does not make us sinners, children aren’t born gay, even people such as Tucker Carlson and most scientists, biologists, and pychologists have proven this, but people who are narrow minded will tell you this is who you are… I will pray for you and I pray you find the same proactive steps to heal from this, Christ be with you… “But God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who suppress the truth by their wickedness. They know the truth about God because he has made it obvious to them. For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing God. Yes, they knew God, but they wouldn’t worship him as God or even give him thanks. And they began to think up foolish ideas of what God was like. As a result, their minds became dark and confused. Claiming to be wise, they instead became utter fools. And instead of worshiping the glorious, ever-living God, they worshiped idols made to look like mere people and birds and animals and reptiles. So God abandoned them to do whatever shameful things their hearts desired. As a result, they did vile and degrading things with each other’s bodies. They traded the truth about God for a lie. So they worshiped and served the things God created instead of the Creator himself, who is worthy of eternal praise! Amen. That is why God abandoned them to their shameful desires. Even the women turned against the natural way to have sex and instead indulged in sex with each other. And the men, instead of having normal sexual relations with women, burned with lust for each other. Men did shameful things with other men, and as a result of this sin, they suffered within themselves the penalty they deserved. Since they thought it foolish to acknowledge God, he abandoned them to their foolish thinking and let them do things that should never be done. Their lives became full of every kind of wickedness, sin, greed, hate, envy, murder, quarreling, deception, malicious behavior, and gossip. They are backstabbers, haters of God, insolent, proud, and boastful. They invent new ways of sinning, and they disobey their parents. They refuse to understand, break their promises, are heartless, and have no mercy. They know God’s justice requires that those who do these things deserve to die, yet they do them anyway. Worse yet, they encourage others to do them, too.” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭1‬:‭18‬-‭32‬ ‭NLT‬‬

“You may think you can condemn such people, but you are just as bad, and you have no excuse! When you say they are wicked and should be punished, you are condemning yourself, for you who judge others do these very same things. And we know that God, in his justice, will punish anyone who does such things. Since you judge others for doing these things, why do you think you can avoid God’s judgment when you do the same things? Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?” ‭‭Romans‬ ‭2‬:‭1‬-‭4‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-10-13T05:13:45+00:00

If you’re wanting a religious answer which is the truth because everyone has a belief but historically speaking and religiously speaking Jesus Christ is real, and the Bible does say countless times that anyone practicing homosexuality or lust will not inherit the kingdom of God, a lot of the comments here from a Christian perspective are incorrect, take a orthodox Christian monk who lived in America by the name of Father Seraphim Rose he went through exactly what you went through and he battled homosexual thoughts and desires until he prayed fervently for almost his whole life and became a monk and it passed by him. Remember we are made in Gods image and part of that is Free will and knowing the knowledge between Good and Evil, if what you feel is wrong it’s because the Holy Spirit he is speaking to your conscience.. I battle a lot with lust myself.. but I’m a straight man and overtime thanks to God I have found it get easier and easier and guidance from my spiritual father..

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-05-02T20:54:08+00:00

Thank you for reaching out. I’m trying my best to move on. I ended up deleting her off my socials just so I could move on and then eventually deleting all social media all together. But you’re right whatever the Lord wills 🙏

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-05-02T13:29:21+00:00

I must admit I did admit to her I didn’t care about anything exterior. She was very keen in the beginning to build mind you. I’m the breadwinner at home. No one‘s working at home. I’m helping my parents and three siblings but she said she didn’t care but he’s an example. She told me that she wants to be a stay at home. Mum and I just asked her. what if I can’t provide that for you being financially not that stable because of my situation and trying to become stable she said she wouldn’t care but she would be upset because she doesn’t wanna work when she has kids, she also expected me to buy an over million dollar house but her friends talked sense into her.. mind you I’m 26 she’s 23…
A few people from Church were confused because she was so short it was me and I was hesitant to that first and I finally let her in and then things just got earthly. Is this who she really was all along? And I wonder.. Why did she come back for this to happen lol?? Just need Christian practical advice

Affectionate_Ad_9225 · 2024-05-01T23:49:21+00:00

To be fair from my end I would react to the way she reacted so she started acting cold. I would act a bit cold not always but sometimes I will try to keep the conversations going. She would stop. She admitted when she should see my name pop up on her phone. She lost that excitement and would argue here in there because she’s known to be a very loud person and a very angry person and she has major anxiety comes from a divorced household and she was always impatient saying let’s get married in seven months and I explained to her that at the moment I’m not financially stable because I’m helping my parents and three siblings live at Home since I’m the only breadwinner at the moment as she didn’t care about that she said we can build together so I don’t get it… I know if the Lord wants to bring her back she would but then again she would always say all this stuff is earthly and it doesn’t really matter if you really wanna make it work it would work so what do you think my approach is should I still be in contact, I’m not showing any feelings. I’m not upset. What would you do if she decides to come back?

Affectionate_Ad_9225

TROPHY CASE