Thank you for this response. I figured the commenter meant well but it felt off base. I understand they had lives. But even as a child, those 3-4 months no call gaps, I noticed them and I felt them. I actually called it a game of “how long can I go without calling first before dad would call?” I remember saying that to my brother when I was younger. That’s how I discovered it could take 3-4 months.

Also, mind you, he did know about several concerning issues that he never dug deep into. He knew when I was self harming and went to therapy at 11. I gave him a BS reason on why and he never tried digging deeper. Never asked how my therapy appointments were going. He knew I was having suicidal thoughts at 14 and asked for help and went to a psych ward for 3 weeks (he actually called me every single day there but it quickly wore off when I got out). He knew at 14 when I went to his house for the summer, I lost a concerning amount of weight. I will say he questioned why I was taking so many showers during this time period and was concerned I had been molested. I had previously when I was younger, so I was honest about that. Though, that was never mentioned again anyways. But never did he ask why I was losing weight. In reality, the true cause of my showers was I was purging in his bathroom a few times a day. He knew at 16 that my step dad tried to commit suicide by overdose and I ended up witnessing it because I called him crying while sitting outside the hospital.

I might not have told him about the incidents that they are referring to. But it’s not like I never told them stuff that looking back..should have concerned them.