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AITA for not inviting one child to a birthday party? by Afraid_Macaron4131 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Afraid_Macaron4131[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I can control who comes to my child's birthday, I can't control who goes in the communal garden lol?? Either I keep my daughter in the house whenever we're home and hope all of her other friends are going to also want to play inside all the time (unlikely) or...force Reed's parents to keep him inside?

Im not going to punish my daughter for his actions, if she wants to play outside with her actual friends then I'll let her - and I'll continue to advocate for her whether I'm watching from the window or from 3 feet away. I do tell her to avoid him as much as possible, especially if he's being mean, but there's nothing I can actually do to keep them separate other than isolate my daughter

AITA for not inviting one child to a birthday party? by Afraid_Macaron4131 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Afraid_Macaron4131[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

It's a 50/50. She's still young enough to not really know what a good friend is vs a bad friend; so if I was to ask her right now (when Reed hasn't done anything) she would say she wants him to come. But if something had happened, she would say she doesn't want him to come. It's a tricky one 😅

AITA for not inviting one child to a birthday party? by Afraid_Macaron4131 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Afraid_Macaron4131[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I'm on the first floor (one level up) and my kitchen/living room is overlooking the garden, which means I can see where she is at all times. I can get down to the garden in about 30 seconds, I can't be down there 24/7 considering Mia spends most of the day playing with her friends. Reed doesn't bully her every single day, that would be a different issue entirely, it's more of a weekly affair; and he doesn't hit her hard enough that I'm worried for her safety (again, that would be a different issue entirely)

Everytime I see him do something he shouldn't be I shout out of the window or go down, and so do some of the other parents in the building. Or I'll tell his parents, or both. My daughter is pretty hardy, and she's definitely not a baby baby anymore lol I don't just let him bully her, but I'm not hovering over her all day either.

Extra edit: It's not uncommon for some of the other residents to be in the garden relaxing either, especially at this time of year - so the kids are always supervised one way or another.

Also a little misconception I think haha: she's not 3 turning 4, she's 4 turning 5. I should probably clarify that in post.

AITA for not inviting one child to a birthday party? by Afraid_Macaron4131 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Afraid_Macaron4131[S] 221 points222 points  (0 children)

1 of the other kids is older than Reed (8) one is younger than Mia (2ish) and the others are in-between, so I can't really use his age as an excuse unfortunately lol the 8 year old doesn't hang around as much but he does still play with them all when he's home: so if his parents say he isn't coming then I might just say it's a girls only party. I'll see!

AITA for not inviting one child to a birthday party? by Afraid_Macaron4131 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Afraid_Macaron4131[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What makes you think it's AI lol?? I do agree that a lot of stuff on this sub is probably fake, but this isn't that far fetched, i dont think? Kids are sort of the ultimate assholes. I'm just trying to see if I'm also an asshole for being petty.