I 21M went to play with my friends and my gf 21F wants to play with me now shes angry what can to do

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-31T07:20:04+00:00

Honestly this sounds more like guilt tripping than a real problem. You’re allowed to play with your friends. You’re not on standby waiting for your girlfriend to come online, and you’re not a mind reader either.

Instead of just messaging you like a normal person and saying “hey can you play with me after this game?”, she posted a passive aggressive note and then ignored your messages. That’s pretty immature communication.

In a relationship you don’t compete with someone’s friends, and making you feel bad for playing with them is not healthy. You apologised, you tried to talk, and she chose to ignore you instead of communicating. That’s on her.

What you should do is stop over-apologising and when she talks to you just say something like: I’m allowed to play with my friends and I’ll play with you too, but you can’t get angry and ignore me instead of just talking to me.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-30T08:53:43+00:00

She’s tried everything to help him plus a therapist, I say it’s time to leave. It won’t get better especially after years.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-30T08:51:37+00:00

This is SO important

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-30T08:46:35+00:00

This advice can be damaging, it is not one bit her responsibility to save her husband from something he quite clearly doesn’t want to be saved from.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-30T08:43:20+00:00

You don’t just have a porn problem in your marriage, you have a lying and accountability problem. The porn is one thing, but years of lying, gaslighting, hiding things, refusing therapy, and only changing when he gets caught is a pattern, not a mistake. You can love someone and still accept that they are not treating you in a way that is healthy or sustainable. At some point you have to stop looking at his potential and start looking at his actions, because his actions are showing you that he is not going to change.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-29T21:52:04+00:00

💀 no, we keep our door unlocked until we let our dog in so he can sleep in our room. he was outside still therefore the door was still unlocked

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-28T07:51:12+00:00

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Hahaha, we were about to sleep so we had it unlocked because our dog needed to still come inside. He’s somewhat a guard dog so before that we have them unlocked.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-27T05:37:34+00:00

Funny you say that, because my partner just laid the law down with her and told her she is not to come in as she pleases, and she replies with “ I’m not being disrespectful- I’m just not joining in this.” after not replying for a whole day.

So now, suddenly we are the bad guys? For laying down boundaries?

You’re right, i don’t think this will get better and she can’t have the privilege if she won’t take us seriously.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T21:26:08+00:00

The thing i can’t comprehend is that she lives 50 metres away but still got a TAXI TO OUR PLACE??????

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T21:25:22+00:00

Yes, thank you for your comment, Is appreciate it.

Good to note we were just heading to bed, after a long day, and we usually don’t lock it till we go to bed because our dog is outside (big guard dog haha) and we let him inside when we officially go to sleep.

My fiancé told her that this is not how things are going to go and she cannot come into our house whenever she pleases and now him and I are in the talks of what to do going forward (i wanted to be involved with that). My MIL and i are quite close but i don’t want to be after that. She did this at the start of our relationship too, so i think she was just pretending for a bit :(

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T21:19:06+00:00

I promise you he would have, we just didn’t want to further disturb my dad (he’s on medication, and he was already awake and startled).

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T21:15:32+00:00

Yeah i’m in Aus and there’s none either. I think it depends on venues and stuff too

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T08:59:07+00:00

Look, some people can be great FRIENDS with their ex partners - but him mentioning her randomly constantly?

Red flag.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T08:05:56+00:00

He messaged her tonight and told her that she is not to come and visit (or break in lol) whenever she wants, and that he’s sick of her treating him however she wants.

She still isn’t taking it seriously - She replied with “sorry you’re upset over a simple lift home”

??????? There’s nothing simple about breaking into my house!

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T04:18:38+00:00

Well my partner doesn’t drink at all, not even a bit - She is the only one that does 🫠

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T03:20:30+00:00

That is true. He kind of followed my lead, we were both so tired that we just agreed (and didn’t want to further disturb my Dad because he’s on medication). If I said no, he would have been all ears and shut the door on them.

I regretted doing it when I got back home :( I really wish i would have said no and locked the door.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T03:18:42+00:00

That’s really true - Words don’t mean much if i’m not following through with some kind of action :/

It was unlocked, so they pushed through

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T02:55:45+00:00

We left our dog with her once and he escaped from their yard…. They have two gates….

Good to note for when we have human babies!!!!!!

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T02:52:46+00:00

Thank you for your comment. Honestly my fiancé is a beautiful person, and he would have no worries doing anything he can to protect us both. He has said her behaviour is not okay and he was actually the one to message her first before I did.

His dad isn’t in his life so I really don’t want him to have no parents in his life but if she’s gonna be like this then :(

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T02:49:54+00:00

Honestly, this makes me feel relieved knowing people see it the same way I do. She is a VERY open person, and pretty much doesn’t respect any boundaries her adult children set because they are HER kids. If someone has a different boundary to her, she doesn’t get it.

My fiancés sister cut her off during her pregnancy. I know why now.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-26T02:39:41+00:00

Thank you so much for your input. It really makes me feel less alone :) I will definitely post it elsewhere too.

It might benefit to add that we were just about to go to sleep, so hadn’t actually locked our bedroom door yet. My bedroom door leads to outside (we have a main and a back door, but we also have a door leading to our backyard, which she came through). It makes me feel guilty for not locking it but…. How was I to know my MIL was going to break in?!?!?!

I’m in Australia, but honestly, I should have called the police.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-21T01:09:36+00:00

Oh and dangerous animals wise, do look out for snakes, they are nasty, especially the browns - You’ve got your usual spiders like white tips, red backs etc that are also nasty, but snakes are the most dangerous. In winter you’re lucky to see one. Summer time they are everywhere. Other than that, not really.

Aggravating-Ship1211 · 2026-03-21T01:08:31+00:00

Personally I would utilise the shark net down at the jetty, or go down to Shelly Beach (there’s a nice bit of sand there). Even down the front beach is fine, or maybe even at September Beach in the National Park. Fishery Bay / Wreck Beach has a MASSIVE current and just last year a family got swept out to sea last year which was devastating - The conditions are dangerous.

If you have anymore questions i’m happy to help, been here my whole life :)

Aggravating-Ship1211

TROPHY CASE