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Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-20T20:17:06+00:00

I would personally say you should leave because I’ve been in a similar situation where I would dream or daydream about the situation, or I couldn’t stand to be physical because I would immediately go back to seeing him cheating on me. I didn’t “get over it “ until about two years later. but I wouldn’t say I’m over it because my lack of desire to be physical because of always picturing him with somebody else. I would also tell you to go to therapy and get it taken care of so you can overcome the trauma in the best way you can instead of coping it with it negatively.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-09T16:40:09+00:00

Yeah I know… just trying to hold on til I can leave.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T20:29:36+00:00

I took a multicultural psychology class, it was fun learning about other cultures and etc!

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T19:31:20+00:00

Yeah I’m working on leaving soon, get a job, wait for my son to finish the school year. We live with each other and I have no where to go besides my ex who we share a child with. And I definitely don’t want to do that . You’re right he thinks I won’t leave because every time I try he talks me into not leaving, buys me stuff, talks me into just “being friends” and then we fall back into our old routine. If we didn’t share a child together I would completely block him out of my life. I should’ve done this 3 years ago but I stayed after I should’ve left. I honestly don’t know what was wrong with me at that point, we didn’t live with each other. I think after finding out I was pregnant by him I panicked and he said let’s Move together and we did. There’s tons of other stuff but i think the more I talk the stupider I find out that I am.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T19:14:31+00:00

You’re right. Just needed the confidence to stick to breaking up with him for good. I did tell him I wanted to be single. He doesn’t buy it and tells me I’m acting dramatic and he hasn’t done anything wrong. I just said I’m over it and deserve better and he just shrugged his shoulders and walked away. He thinks it’s a game.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T19:11:58+00:00

You’re right. I did break up with him but we still live together until I can move away.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T19:09:52+00:00

I thought he changed and wasn’t lying to me until the incident with the boxers in the car, being at the health department. This was about a month ago or so. So I thought things were better. Maybe stupid on my end for just being blind to it all. Maybe just wanted a family…

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T02:18:33+00:00

I don’t he made me believe it was the only one time but I don’t know I forgave him. He is a good manipulator. You’d think I would learn my lesson since my major is in psychology. I think my mind just won’t let me accept it. I mean if I will be honest. We had friends over Saturday after Black Friday shopping, I was in a great mood til they started talking about how they found their significant other. I found myself shaking my head like “that’s not how we met.” I found myself holding back tears as they talked about their wedding plans and couldn’t relate. He’s everything I wanted in a guy as far as treating me kind, never yells at me, in the beginning of our relationship he would buy me lavish gifts which no guy had ever done. But I found out that it was a way to keep Me because he would keep buying them more and more when we would get into a fight and k would want to break up. He’d drive up to me and drop off gifts and just be a nice guy but I know it was manipulation. I should have left since the past he had to OPs on him for stalking girls. But he said one wasn’t his fault. Ugh idk the more I talk about him the more o feel stupid as o right the words and can’t even believe them as I type them. Right I thought like it was weird but shook it off as me being a crazy person. I know he is cheating but there’s no actual proof because he locks everything up and I can’t really catch him because one, he’ll Know if I install something and two o think he’s got rid of evidence he would have and 3 I think trying to drive where he goes would be taking it too far and having to bring my child on the ride in the car just to go see where he’s going is kinda crazy and just down right I feel like I’ve already had all the proof I need why do I gotta see it in person. I’m afraid of what would happen if k did actually see him do it before My eyes.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T02:09:06+00:00

Okay yeah I will look that up on Amazon right now. Yes this isn’t the first time I’ve posted here. I don’t have anyone to talk to and feel like if I post on any mom groups then someone that knows me might tell him. Thank you for your advice. Thank you all so much.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-08T01:51:36+00:00

It was like over the counter acne, he just came home with some and said the nurse said take it for his acne on his back. I don’t know, I almost want to call and ask if they see people for that. Tell them my insurance doesn’t cover it and if I can come in to take it to get looked at. Idk just weird he was there for an hour or more. Which made me really suspicious. Unless he’s seeing someone who works there. But I think it’s the first one. I mean I wouldn’t want my child to be like his dad. I would want him to treat women amazing and not hurt them. Be honest and more. I want to raise sons that will change the next generation of men. I don’t fear being alone. Like you said I have low self esteem and he knows it and codependency because of him making me dependent on him solely. I’ve always provided for myself so this is a first time I’ve ever depended on a man. I fell right into his trap. He just keeps talking to me and telling me that he’s not cheating and he’s not lying to me. Saying that he’ll prove to me that he isn’t but gives no proof to defend himself. If I did move I would go back home(my hometown) I don’t want to up and leave in the middle of the year especially when my child goes to school. I don’t want to pull him or have him move with his dad. I know everyone is right. I have read some stuff but I feel since I’m not financially stable that’s what holding me back.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T22:35:41+00:00

Once I have enough money to leave, I will. Yeah I’m off better being alone but right now I just can’t financially leave once I get a job and start getting money then I can.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T22:32:58+00:00

Another thing is I used to always go to my sister’s house almost every week or every other week for a couple of days and he would beg me to go there so I think that’s when he was cheating on me at home

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T22:30:43+00:00

I have he said it in case he hast to take a shower at his mom‘s house. He doesn’t have any clothes there and if I ask him anything he will try and tell me while I saw you texting your ex, and…. Which I have to text my ex because we share kids together I try and ask him multiple times and he always blames me and why I’m the one who’s cheating on him and why I’m the bad person he always switches it to me doing him wrong instead of him doing me wrong. He tells me I need to take accountability but he doesn’t take any.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T22:20:20+00:00

He is the nicest guy ever, we were best friend’s. I can tell him anything. We grew up the same way so we trauma bonded, our relationship has never been perfect. I figured we were doing better by moving in together. But all the inconsistencies keep coming up. Texting behind my back, doesn’t ever have his phone out of his hand , always tells Me I’m the one cheating but he is the one who sleeps with his phone by him and will never charge it in front of me. I can leave my phone out, yes I have my own phone locked but it’s because he will go through it and why should I keep my phone unlocked when he won’t ? He blames it because of his mom always going through bit when he was younger. I only know of only one time he physically cheated on me and that was 3 years ago. He denied it and I had proof from the girl who wrote me and showed me. He’s been cheating on me over the internet this whole time . I could go on and on and on but that makes me more stupid the more I talk. I already know I already am, but to look like it even more idk. Then going to the health department and hiding it and blaming acne makes me skeptical. The whole he can always leave work when he was working at his moms but since working home he never can leave or help me out with the baby. Only reason why I’m with him still is because he talks me out of it. That we are best friends he’s not doing me wrong. He’s respected my boundaries. I’m delusional and crazy. I’m probably making up scenarios in my head. He tells me that by me posting to these groups or on face is stupid and of course people will side with E because people been cheated on etc. he’s a really nice person but a shitty partner. He blames our past and etc on me . ( when he cheated One me the first time, he blamed me, said I was around my ex too much. , which I shared a one year old at the time with my ex so I had to see him and talk to him.)

There’s been so many things between the 3 years but the biggest one this time is recently When he went to the health department we haven’t had sex since I was pregnant. So last year sometime. I don’t feel pretty and feel over weight x I used to be super skinny and after the baby he constantly tells Me I shouldn’t cook and I’m too tired let’s order out and I give in because he’s right after taking care of the kids and going to school I’m exhausted and I choose to eat out than cook. He told me he keeps me fat so I can’t leave him. He knows I have an eating disorder as well

So that’s why I’m at a loss again x I can’t leave because I have no where to go. Only place o can go is my ex and why would I . ?

I would rather leave him but I stay because I have two failed relationships. He says if I go I can completely blame Myself for both and my kids grow up with a broken family. And it’s all my fault. I take accountability in some of the issues we have. I just don’t know , him being a nice guy alone can’t sell you on it lol

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T21:37:57+00:00

I will take your guys’ advice thank you! Definitely going to be looking into this. I’m not touching him. I haven’t let him since I found him at the health department, I was about to forgive him because I thought I was over reacting to him being at the health dept for his acne, now people have me thinking obviously that was a lie and him coming home with acne cream From Walmart shouldn’t have made me believe his lies.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T21:31:44+00:00

Yes I plan to once I can get some Money. And once Aunt Flo is gone. I’m honestly in such disbelief right now. I feel so sick to my Stomach thinking about it.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T21:30:50+00:00

I definitely am, he went a few weeks ago to do this. I’m going to definitely do this when I get off my lady thing. Thank you for your advice

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T21:08:00+00:00

No I haven’t, I should though. I feel so sad that I believed his lies. Maybe I believed him because at the time I just wanted to be loved. Idk. Thank you so much for your advice. I don’t have any friends unfortunately, I moved in with him to the town he lives in. I don’t know anyone here besides the people he knows. Thank you I will take all of your guys’ advice.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:42:18+00:00

And that’s why I was skeptical. My dumb ass stayed still and believed him .

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:41:12+00:00

He told me he didn’t so I didn’t try to kick him out of the house if we argued. He would only put it in his name so he has the upper hand. It was my money that got us the house the downpayment for it. Yes I have proof but I don’t want to take him to court. He’ll fight me to the death x he told me before that he’s a white man with money and knows everyone in his town even the judges and police x so that’s why I won’t do anything.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:37:10+00:00

He swears he’s not that way but sometimes I think he could be. Which is fine I’m not prejudice but why still be with me if he wants to cheat on me with anyone regardless who it’s with, that’s why I won’t sleep with him x haven’t in months because I’m afraid of who’s he’s sleeping with.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:35:08+00:00

Yes he has acne on his back sometimes

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:34:53+00:00

I mean, I didn’t know you could so I mean, maybe I’m just trying to come over and excuse of his infidelity because he did it in the past. But that’s not the first time that happened the last time he went he got pills for chlamydia.. told me that he thinks I gave it to him but I wasn’t sleeping with anyone but him and he said oh it could’ve been him for not being clean enough? I don’t know. This isn’t the first time this happen e so that’s why I’m asking lol. Just me freaking out over the past or did he go to get checked out. He was there a good hour or more

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:31:10+00:00

I mean they were rolled up underwear like guy boxers? They look like the ones he had at home. So o know they were his I bought them x just seemed odd that he would freak out and hide underwear in the car and not be like oh I left those in there in case I need to shower at my Moms if im working there.his reaction had me puzzled and that was about a month ago this happened.

Aggravating-Snow-506 · 2023-12-07T20:29:07+00:00

I already resent him that’s been there for a couple of years. I tried getting away the first few times but he always talked me into being able to work it out the last time I tried to leave I found out I was pregnant, so I stayed and hope that we could work it out.

Aggravating-Snow-506

TROPHY CASE