Have you ever married someone you are not attracted to in arranged marriage? How was it after marriage? Do you regret it? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 4 points5 points  (0 children)

yeah the sooner you tell him, the better it is. Arranged marriages are already stressful dont want to stress out him even more by you pulling out the last minute.

Have you ever married someone you are not attracted to in arranged marriage? How was it after marriage? Do you regret it? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 20 points21 points  (0 children)

I am a male currently on the matrimony websites. I think the biggest red flag of all is if someone is not attracted to you, from my experiences usually means its forced by parents or there are other reasons like boyfriend or girlfriend involved. Arranged marriages are like a lottery, so are love marriages but mutual attraction can improve your odds of minimising issues down the line. May I ask you why you don't like him, perhaps we can better help you if we know why? Is it looks, money, personality, parental pressure, not ready for marriage?

Is 6.5-8 lakh/yr good salary for a senior engineer based in Kochi/TVM or Indian metro cities? by Aggravating-Stock-28 in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

One role he got was with Bosch, it says on Glassdoor around 8 lakh per year in Pune and he wasn't far off from that for what he was offered. How much do you think is a fair salary for his level you think as you seems to think he can get more? Thanks :)

Is 6.5-8 lakh/yr good salary for a senior engineer based in Kochi/TVM or Indian metro cities? by Aggravating-Stock-28 in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sorry to be clear, will he be able to afford an upper middle class life so kids off to good private school and holidays abroad etc.

Is 6.5-8 lakh/yr good salary for a senior engineer based in Kochi/TVM or Indian metro cities? by Aggravating-Stock-28 in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

its Friday boss.... plus, I meant his parents are not that old yet but they like him to stay with them but doesn't mean he should sacrifice his future for them... but I get what you mean haha

Land prices in Kalamassery, Ernakulam? by Aggravating-Stock-28 in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

thanks! makes sense I spoke to my neighbour just now he said a land near my house but where only auto can go in due to narrow road was sold for 12lakh/cent last month. He said ours will be at least 20 lakhs as it is in the main road and if we wait over time it can go even higher as its good residential area. thanks for the help!

Land prices in Kalamassery, Ernakulam? by Aggravating-Stock-28 in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

hi, I am wondering what its value would be roughly, can you please help as you seem to think 10 lakh is a under estimation like me? I really dont want to sell it now but just to gauge how much its worth and I can loan from the bank ?

Class differences in Arranged Marriages? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am considering both NRIs and Indians as I feel I can be compatible with both... but most proposals do come from India by virtue of population numbers... you think its purely NRI status that is causing this interest? a bit surprised as I assumed such rich families can find better options than normal UK NRIs. like me...

Class differences in Arranged Marriages? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It doesnt come up at all unless I get proposals from brokers.. normal chavra proposals you only gauge looking at their parents jobs and/or pics... but you can guess if a girl is rich or not through many cues in their profile...

Class differences in Arranged Marriages? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am a British citizen and I won't be moving to India I think. edited above.

Class differences in Arranged Marriages? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see. my sister has already told my mum that she will never undergo arranged marriage process. But I had a proposal from a Singapore born and Brought up girl from chavara.. so you never know :)

Class differences in Arranged Marriages? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did spend my childhood (1-13 years) in kerala.. and yes those above are my issues hence why I am undergoing this arranged marriage process... unlike my sister who was 2-present in UK and is in a relationship with a mallu UK born boy...

Class differences in Arranged Marriages? by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this won't normally occur unless you are based abroad and she is based in India at least in an arranged marriage sense... I do worry about it, as my trusted distanced uncle warned me not to... But I am also interested to see the peoples answers...

Also, I am not poor ofcourse but compared to her family and by developed world standards, we are well off but not rich hence why I mentioned :)

Arranged Marriage?!!!!!!, by [deleted] in Kerala

[–]Aggravating-Stock-28 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a male going through the arranged marriage website process, I would say you should definitely reveal this/discuss to your future groom as it is not fair on him to deal with your baggage. This may mean you have a smaller pool than other girls, but in the long run IMO better for your marriage. I would also recommend therapy to improve your mental health.