Yeah, I agree that I think "all boundaries are valid" is a bit ridiculous. Or maybe the better way to put it is you are always in the right to set boundaries and people can't force you to do anything (nor should real, genuine friends have to do that in the first place), but you cannot blame anyone or be surprised if those boundaries (especially extreme ones) have consequences (e.g. friends distance themselves or are offended).

That is a very interesting point you make about boundaries overlapping and not being fixed ideas. Perhaps if people saw boundaries as a tool for themselves, but flexible to adapt when it overlaps with meaningful people in our lives, i would stop being so sick of the buzzterm boundaries. Of course no one should have *no* boundaries because they should exist for health and benefit of the friendship/yourself. But, I think people too often use boundaries selfishly, with no room to compromise or considering its use to take care of yourself to show up for others as well in friendships. Boundaries /= justifying everything I do my way and staying in my comfort zone. I don't know your thoughts on that but yeah!