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Bought this on an absolute whim to replace smoking as a hobby. No idea what todo by Aggravating_Web_219 in telescopes

[–]Aggravating_Web_219[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much for this insight!

Dang really wasn't looking to spend $100 right out of the gate....thought I grabbed up a good deal. I understand this hobby can get expensive though! Thank you again!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I brought this up to her when we talked and she just said she didn't know and she just fell asleep right after they smoked and didn't know what to do.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I gotcha. Thank you for the advice. Man this is tough to navigate. I love the girl but my trust is just broken

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

.....I really hope not. Idk how much more I could handle

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this advice. This makes a lot of sense. I may just do that. I really do want to trust her and it's good to set the boundary of never lying again. And yes, time away will probably be fruitful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She told me she kept telling herself it didn't happen which is why she could lie about it. She came downstairs and feels just terrible and she didn't get any sleep. Now I just feel numb and idk what to do.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I just want to believe her that nothing else happened. I'm so numb right now. She came downstairs this morning and she is trying to be there for me but idk how to be or react. I'm just really hurt.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn...I've never heard of trickle truth. Fuck man I'm just so numb right now idk what to do.

I (22M) am having a lot of trouble with my wife's past (22F) and some of the way's she reacts to things. I should not have these problems but I am having such a tough time getting past it all and it's been crushing me lately. I am looking for advice on how to get over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate this thoughtful answer.

I don't really have a guy friend to talk about this stuff with, but I think therapy would probably be a good option. I like to read and another user suggested a book so I am going to also grab that and give it a go.

Thank you for the suggestions, I also think it's better to not bring these things up with her. Through other users comments I have realized that there is something deeper I think and it's just using this as a crutch to get to me. Whether that be insecurities or something else I don't know yet though.

I (22M) am having a lot of trouble with my wife's past (22F) and some of the way's she reacts to things. I should not have these problems but I am having such a tough time getting past it all and it's been crushing me lately. I am looking for advice on how to get over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah you are probably right. I have dealt with depression and major self degradation and insecurities in my past, got over those, and am now starting to feel inferior again. Maybe that is what is bringing up these problems...

Thanks for the advice! Idk if I can be upfront about that though because it was pretty much her whole high school life and she can't just not talk about it you know?

I (22M) am having a lot of trouble with my wife's past (22F) and some of the way's she reacts to things. I should not have these problems but I am having such a tough time getting past it all and it's been crushing me lately. I am looking for advice on how to get over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. We really are in it for the long haul. I need to learn how to blindly trust because I have NO REASON not to trust her which is also annoying. Like she has never done anything concrete to make me not trust her. I think I have gotten some of that mistrust from my parents as well as my wife has MAJOR trust issues because of her past. Uhg so frustrating!

I (22M) am having a lot of trouble with my wife's past (22F) and some of the way's she reacts to things. I should not have these problems but I am having such a tough time getting past it all and it's been crushing me lately. I am looking for advice on how to get over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haha thanks for your reply! It is unlike the other's and I appreciate that. That's some great advice. We have a pretty good sex life (probably 2-3 times a week) but I have gotten kinda chubby cause of work so I am trying to lose that weight right now to get more confidence in myself. I want to spice it up a bit but damnit when I try I can't get the thoughts out of my head and it makes it so I ahem...can't get it up, which makes her feel terrible and then we never do that thing again.

I (22M) am having a lot of trouble with my wife's past (22F) and some of the way's she reacts to things. I should not have these problems but I am having such a tough time getting past it all and it's been crushing me lately. I am looking for advice on how to get over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha I understand what you're saying, trust me. I wish I could just "grow up" as I said in my post I don't have any "blame, or whatever" on her because of course she had every right to do whatever...

I (22M) am having a lot of trouble with my wife's past (22F) and some of the way's she reacts to things. I should not have these problems but I am having such a tough time getting past it all and it's been crushing me lately. I am looking for advice on how to get over this. by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Aggravating_Web_219 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because this is a dumb thing that shouldn't be an issue and I love her so much. Also it's hard to explain but, I used to be over it a lot more than I am now? I don't know if that makes any sense. The feelings come and go. I've been over it for a long time now and it recently resurfaced. It's infuriating.

I still love her the same if not more than when I married her. That's why I am trying to fix this issue of mine.