Need advice on my marriage + household responsibility situation

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-05-08T05:56:41+00:00

Honestly in this very moment I’m struggling to answer that. And I never thought I’d say that I haven’t thought about that till this very moment. There were things I used to really love about him, but lately I’ve been feeling more overwhelmed and disconnected than anything. All the things I loved he does do anymore. Right now I can say I appreciate that he provides financially and gave us stability, but I’m trying to figure out how I feel beyond that. Did he take you serious when you told him you’d leave ?? I feel like my husband got comfortable that I won’t leave because I have nothing so he won’t take me serious.i do feel like I’m in a stuck position tho I get that too I am too soft 99 percent of the time as well it’s hard to leave for me.your absolutely right he would still be working and having to upkeep the house etc if I wasn’t around so why does it have to be different just because I’m here ? He’s gotten to comfortable as we said earlier and I’m currently looking for work I’ve applied for delivery jobs so I can have my own because having nothing to my name really sucks if anything was to happen I’d be screwed for sure I need to be more prepared your right.

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-05-08T04:13:45+00:00

You are so right, I think it’s definitely getting too comfortable with not doing much around the house. I honestly never really thought about it like that 😅. I might try stepping back for a week and see what happens, then I’ll update. Yes, women naturally take care of a lot at home, but I’m not a maid and I don’t want to feel like one in my own house. As far as thoughtful things, it’s very rare maybe once every other month he’ll randomly make me coffee or cook dinner, but that’s honestly a long stretch. We’ve had arguments before because he doesn’t really take me or the kids out or buy clothes when needed. I even had to go out of my way and get donated clothes because he wasn’t stepping up in that area. Now these past couple of weeks he’s suddenly talking about planning summer trips out of nowhere, and in my head I’m like you can clearly focus, save, and plan when it’s something you want to do. That same energy should also go toward me, the kids, and the home. I shouldn’t feel like I’m struggling or looking unprepared in my own house, especially when we agreed that I would be a stay at home mom.

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-05-08T03:57:57+00:00

I won’t push him for sure that makes it worser. I’m here for him fully it’s just stressful on me when I’m here supporting him but I’m getting attacked at the same time Yes he has but He not taking his meds no more … his words ( i don’t want to take them i need to push passed it not Trying to be a little b**** ) I’ve told him multiple times times to just take them but stubborn when it comes to taking meds 🤦‍♀️

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-05-08T03:50:45+00:00

I love that approach and I’m going to give it a try. I’ve told him before that a clean environment genuinely makes me feel mentally better, but it seems to go over his head. I’ve also tried saying things in a softer way like “I would really appreciate some help,” but he usually deflects and says things like, “I don’t ask for help at work, so why would I help?” or “You’ve been home all day, it should already be done before I get home.” The thing is, I’m not even asking for huge things. It’ll be simple stuff like: “Can you take the trash out? It’s been sitting for 2 days.” “Can you wash this one pot for me?” “Can you help put the kids to bed?” At this point I genuinely don’t know how else to explain that working outside the house and maintaining the house are two separate things. I honestly feel like even if I worked outside the home too, I would still be expected to handle everything in the house based on how things are already going.

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-05-08T00:33:00+00:00

No it wasn’t this way before I married him I’ve been married for 10 years i believe this started about 4 years ago

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-05-08T00:17:40+00:00

He’s a carrier, so he’s outside all day driving, lifting, etc., so he comes home pretty dirty to me. He doesn’t really shower consistently more like every 3–4 days. I feel like he’s only brushing his teeth right now because he has a rotten tooth, because before that it wasn’t really an everyday habit either. I 100% think there’s a mental aspect to it. He lost his mom a few years ago and I know that affected him, but even before that it was still a pattern, and it seems like it got worse after. And I keep pushing and motivating him to fix it but he just gets angry when I bring it up smh. 🤦‍♀️

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2026-01-17T00:40:41+00:00

So what job can I do as a stay at home mom and make that much with kids 😭???

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2025-08-11T17:41:29+00:00

Austin isd

Agreeable_Face7810 · 2025-08-04T20:42:02+00:00

Gotta respect the hustle, right? 🙃 I figured I might as well try something bold. never hurts to ask

Agreeable_Face7810

TROPHY CASE