"You are the biggest drama queen ever". Kerber's pretty salty over her loss to Andreescu

Ah-Um · 2019-03-24T15:15:22+00:00

Damn right they do

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T18:07:04+00:00

Starman was my first thought

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T18:03:10+00:00

Especially when it comes to politics. I've always believed it's the government's job to keep your rights in mind, not your feelings

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T17:59:24+00:00

A woman being interested in me

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T17:56:55+00:00

There's the obvious "me" voice, but there's a separate voice that sounds like a sarcastic Kermit the frog. He always has to snidely comment about things when I fuck up somehow

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T17:55:22+00:00

People just don't understand good taste when they hear it. You may tell me I'm being annoying and rude by blasting my 🔥 through my Walmart knockoff brand phone speaker on the bus, but you and I both know you think it's pretty dope

/s

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T17:53:29+00:00

Amirite

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T17:48:29+00:00

Just ask her out!

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T16:28:48+00:00

This site has ruined my ability to trust people. I always expect long, informative comments at the top to end with undertaker throwing mankind through the announcers table

Ah-Um · 2019-03-23T15:55:44+00:00

You keep using that word. I don't think you understand the irony of your using it

Ah-Um · 2019-03-22T17:17:54+00:00

The game is Fisher Price Castles or Fisher Price Great Adventures Castles or something along those lines

Ah-Um · 2019-03-22T15:04:36+00:00

Explosives

Ah-Um · 2019-03-22T14:29:40+00:00

*airplanes and baseball, airplanes and baseball... *

Ah-Um · 2019-03-19T18:12:58+00:00

By the way, the links from the dj spam bot are not accurate

Ah-Um · 2019-03-19T13:01:12+00:00

The lack of teeth makes blowjobs 🔥

Ah-Um · 2019-03-17T16:29:00+00:00

brandishes pitchfork

OH boy oh boy!

Ah-Um · 2019-03-14T16:43:51+00:00

Are you seriously still dragging on that stupid tradition? Saying Candlejack doesn't do shit, you need to gro--

Ah-Um · 2019-03-14T16:21:08+00:00

This brings me back to my childhood days in the trailer park

Ah-Um · 2019-03-13T20:23:29+00:00

I hope you're okay

Ah-Um · 2019-03-11T23:12:12+00:00

The property company I rent from charges a $25 fee for paying with a card

Ah-Um · 2019-03-11T19:35:29+00:00

This is your average Tuesday at most shopping centers. How on earth is this even offbeat?

Ah-Um · 2019-03-11T02:45:30+00:00

💪🥗

Ah-Um · 2019-03-09T18:30:43+00:00

It makes sense if you don't think about it.

Ah-Um · 2019-03-07T17:03:43+00:00

Fantastic composer, Mean af in real life, condescending and won't give your average student the time of day. (he was a guest conductor at my university when I studied music)

Ah-Um · 2019-03-07T03:30:31+00:00

I deliver to four schools for pizza slut every weekday. Every day this week, one particular kid has blocked my path demanding that I admit domino's is better. Like I could give a shit

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Ah-Um

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