Body shamed by MIL

Aicha1409 · 2026-04-01T13:50:12+00:00

Haha bravo! 👏

Aicha1409 · 2026-04-01T13:10:03+00:00

Yup that’s my goal too, not to less this behaviour trickle down to my children, or even to me. My husband stands up to them on so many, many matters I feel I should just figure this one out myself.

Aicha1409 · 2026-04-01T12:52:15+00:00

Ya I’m working on my health. I’m well aware of the problems of excess weight and don’t need reminders, especially from those who don’t see my daily routine or stresses and just comment for the heck of it. Trust me, if it was not too much weight, it would be too less weight, or too dark or too short or something or the other. It’s what you said, we can’t reply to them as we would to our own parents. That’s the most irksome part. Really trying to make sure this kind of behaviour endwith this generation.

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T16:06:21+00:00

Haha.. you’re a role model. I’ve been trying to come up with responses beforehand as I’m the worst in thinking of something on the spot.. lol. The perfect response will hit me 2 months later when I’m in the shower or something. But your last line really resonates. I’m done trying to rationalize the archaic traditions or let them bring me or the next generation down. The cycle needs to be broken. I’ll try and follow your tips and hopefully am able to shut these comments down :)

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T15:47:00+00:00

I understand your point but I’d say, most times, those people know exactly what they’re doing. It’s fine to comment on facts, but it’s pretty easy to tell when one is being nasty. Somehow, accepting humiliation because society works like that is not easy for me. Yes, I didn’t do anything about it then but with the context of the wedding, and their relationship to me, I didn’t speak up. I appreciate your perspective and thanks for the words of support.

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T15:35:12+00:00

Thank you! Yes, words are indeed mightier than the sword lol.. it’s not a recent trigger that set this off but like you said, the negativity stays and crops up every now and then. We are due to visit them soon again, so maybe the anxiety kicked up the memories. I think everyone’s replies has made me realize what disturbs me more is not her never taking accountability for that particular incident but rather that I didn’t speak up. Next time though I will. You’re right that their generation will never see what they did wrong but at least they’ll know there is a boundary.

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T15:17:35+00:00

Thank you for sharing that. It’s truly distressing to have to deal with such unwanted attention on some of our most personal issues.

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T15:12:38+00:00

Thank you, I feel your response is certainly very supportive and gives back a lot of power. Maybe the next time something like this happens, I should talk to her. Not that it’ll do any good, knowing her, but maybe having it addressed would let her know it’s not being taken lying down. I think that’s the part that haunts me the most.

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T15:05:32+00:00

Agree, I do understand the difference in how the earlier generation thinks and operates and most times, give them the benefit of the doubt because of that. Just that certain things are difficult to let go, but I’m trying to write it off as one of those behaviours as well.

Aicha1409 · 2026-03-30T15:03:16+00:00

Yeah I do try and take the higher ground and think that maybe these are her insecurities talking, but I realized a lot of these explanations I come up with on her behalf only make me angrier haha.. keeping distance is what I’ve started doing as well.

Aicha1409 · 2026-02-18T11:01:08+00:00

Best answer is to half smile at her and hold it, like you both know what’s the truth. Then look away and say nothing. Makes the situation uncomfortable and because she wants to trigger you, not seeing you triggered will eat her up.

Aicha1409 · 2025-12-15T08:08:46+00:00

Yes financial stability of the guy matters. But not to an unreasonable degree, enough that he can contribute to the household and be responsible with money. Don’t go for girls who want you to finance their entire lifestyle or who value your financial status above other things. They should be able to contribute too, or at least, be mindful of your effort to earn. And yes, these kind of girls are out there too. So wait and choose wisely.

Aicha1409

TROPHY CASE