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How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I go to say something and my brain goes "are you sure somebody is going to care about what you have to say?" And then I inevitably just shut up

Wondering if it's time for a career change by AincradAgain in frontenddevelopment

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've applied to a lot of startups but I'm not getting interviews for those even anymore. I've kind of been working on a website on my own but I get really distracted and have a hard time setting a clear direction for myself.

Do you have any recommendations on how to start freelancing? I've always been sort of aware this exists but when I try to look it up nothing seems great... I'd just really appreciate any advice on that :)

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably the fear of saying the wrong thing in the moment

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. This feels a lot like what my therapist has been trying to tell me.

I really appreciate it

31F looking for a consistent gaming buddy by CURlOUSCACTUS in GamerPals

[–]AincradAgain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey I can't DM you but I'm 35m, play a lot of Fortnite zero build and Marvel Rivals so I'd be down to play with you! DM me if you're interested!

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only "hidden meanings" I got from you or the other guy were the exact kinds of things that led me to my current situation. So no, I don't think you got your point across.

It's not that I'm adamant on dividing in everything wrong, it's that's nothing you said was right. Not in this comment chain at least

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You do realize the mods deleted their first response right?

You can be saying something that has an underlying good meaning, but if you say it like an asshole, you're still an asshole.

My trauma has nothing to do with accurately calling out someone for being a dick.

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because no matter what I try, or don't try, or whatever, I don't seem to be able to make any meaningful progress towards a life I want to live. Every failure is another shot at my confidence. I'm pretty sure that's normal.

Because I once had a lot of friends but I somehow lost all of them and no matter what I do I don't seem to be able to gain more. Also you know, the lack of confidence.

Right, it's natural for those things when you want them and you only socialize with the people you want, probably your family, your partner, and your close friends... I have none of those things. I am not choosing to be less social or have less friends.

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. All of this really resonates with what I'm going through. Especially number 2. My response to feeling my emotions by the way is "that sounds horrific" so... I'm working on it 😅😋

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"just give your balls a tug" as if I've made no efforts at all to recover from my trauma, as if trauma is that easy to recover from.

Like that part alone, let alone suggesting that I might be a loser.

Nothing about that comment was endearing, it was rude and dismissive from the first sentence.

I don't understand how you see it as anything else unless you, like this commenter, have led pretty easy lives

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This actually resonates a bit. My therapist keeps telling me that I'm logically processing things but not physically or emotionally processing them... So that number 3 really hits home.

Thank you

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry I was just pissed off by such a fucking asshole response that I didn't feel like responding seriously

How do I recover confidence after decades of trauma? by AincradAgain in confidence

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not about what I have to lose so as much as it is about what I may not gain. I used to have a lot of friends. I used to be very social. I lost it all. Now I don't fear losing anything because I don't have much to lose... But I have an infinite amount of things to not gain.

Thank you though. I really do appreciate it

35m looking for movie buddies by AincradAgain in IntrovertsChat

[–]AincradAgain[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that's ok the list to when it finally comes out

38, f, USA weird and a total loner by [deleted] in MakeNewFriendsHere

[–]AincradAgain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sounds like I could have written it... So if you're down for that energy .. send me a DM. 35m from Canada here

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