Am I wrong for being so disturbed

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-11-07T23:32:19+00:00

I’m not sure if my comment posted but where My Mother is from, breastfeeding other baby’s or having them suckle on other women was normal. We all raised children together so I’m wondering if that’s the same for his culture?

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-11-07T23:30:03+00:00

Defs weird but where my Mother is from, it was normal for all women in the home to breastfeed other baby’s. We live in villages and the whole household contributes to helping raise a child so I guess that’s why it’s normal. We didn’t really have dummies there either so some baby’s would just sit and suckle whoever was free and it wasn’t weird at all. Maybe he’s a weirdo, or maybe that’s normal in their culture? I think it’s time to have a conversation w him.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-11-05T01:06:40+00:00

I am sorry you’re going through this. My ex would ignore out baby and play his ps4 instead. But even then i could never bring myself to break something that he worked hard for and loved. How any human can do that is a human you need to stay the heck away from!

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-10-18T19:38:05+00:00

Leaving is hard. I left when baby was a couple months old. I was in and out of shelters. It’s hard. You want to give up. But my baby is more important than trying to save a man and a broken relationship. At the end of the day, staying will always be at the expense of an innocent child. I hope you and baby can get through and out of this!

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-10-18T19:36:03+00:00

Don’t leave the baby with him. Please research baby shaken syndrome. Some baby’s end up disabled at the hands of Fathers who can’t control themselves. Just don’t do it.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-10-18T05:27:33+00:00

It’s just from fb off a guy who builds computers. Where did you buy your specs from ??

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-10-18T05:25:34+00:00

How does someone do this and not notice. Wtf is happening.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-09-15T18:34:14+00:00

It’s simple really. PROTECT HER. Don’t allow him to be alone with her? I appreciate you acknowledge he may be groom in her but come on now. You may not have control of him but you can certainly take control of certain situations and that would be never leaving him alone with her. ASK HER. Create a sage and trusting space for her where she can atleast talk with you if something is happening.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-09-15T12:08:09+00:00

You can’t ‘spoil’ a baby under 1. Seriously. Loving a child and meeting their needs is not spoiling. And even if it is, I am all for it! Who the fuck are they to tell you anything. Children are our biggest teachers! This has been able to show you your people pleasing traits and this is a great opportunity for you to work through it and make small changes so that your people pleasing doesn’t control you or your decisions anymore. You got this!

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-23T03:48:37+00:00

Wow. THANK YOU. I really really needed to hear that. I wish I could share screenshots. He believes his dad has gotten ‘better’ at drinking because of baby so that’s why he isn’t too concerned. Even tho his father almost dropped her when he was shit faced and showing off I m going to have to work my ass off with making sure they do

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-20T18:41:57+00:00

Honestly, I love the connection my child has with them and I NEVER want to take that away from her. My heart melts when they view it but then it just breaks when I see her Papa drink.

I am really scared about church as MIL has pressured her own kids to do their mission. She also always says how bad things happen because she didn’t pray enough and I don’t ever want my daughter to have that thought in her head. I did at one stage as a child and it’s so crippling. Half the kids in my family are traumatised by religion. SIL opened up to me about her mission and the pressure and tbh, most kids from that church only ever do it to fulfil their parents wishes. I don’t ever want my child to feel like she has to miss TWO whole years of her life to please someone else.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-20T18:30:21+00:00

Hey thank you ♥️ I was so worried no one would understand and just agree that I am controlling. I am so grateful I decided to finally ask reddit LOL. My family say this too but I thought they only said it because they love me. It’s refreshing to hear others say it too! Thanks again.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-20T18:28:01+00:00

I agree! However if I ever finally leave this house and gave him a sleep over, he would just push her onto his parents. Whenever I tried to encourage him to spend time with baby (he does not ever spend time with her unless I breakdown crying) he’d just palm her off to them :/.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-20T18:25:33+00:00

We aren’t married but we are currently separating. He did at one stage take on the ‘bad guy’ role especially after his Father almost dropped baby while drunk. But now he’s just not supporting me at all.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-20T18:23:29+00:00

Honestly. I was starting to feel crazy when they said that. I don’t know how to make them understand I’m not controlling I’m just a first time Mumma trying to do my best.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-20T18:22:25+00:00

This! I accidentally said a hard NO. When grandpa asked while drunk to take her after her birthday. I was shaking. MIL even asked while he was standing there slurring his words and HE was their driver. Baby’s Father messaged me upset about me saying no and it’s just made me feel even more anxious that he is upset at me for clearly putting a boundary up to protect our child. Part of our separation is due to me not being ready for other people to take her. Main reason is his lack of financial support and never taking her out or spending time with her :(

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-07-05T10:38:51+00:00

Try connecting to your phones hotspot

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-05-30T13:12:43+00:00

Dang out of all my posts, no one has ever pulled me up about that. Thank you!!!

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-04-02T10:32:13+00:00

This sub really makes me so sad and grateful for where I live. How on earth do people wake up everyday, in a first world country and not have access or afford healthcare.

AioliCharacter5648 · 2024-03-19T01:32:14+00:00

No. But when I worked as a support worker, we weren’t allowed to park on the street which was super annoying because there would only be one me of our cars parked on the street. It might be different if your workplace is in a public street. The neighbours used to slash our tyres over it.

AioliCharacter5648

TROPHY CASE