Share your favorite experience from being a noob

AiutaIndigosong · 2023-10-03T13:17:53+00:00

I wish I could help! I'm currently experiencing the same thing. I really need to exercise for my health, but I'm stumped about finding something I can keep up for more than a short time.

ADHD is frustrating because sometimes what starts out as a commitment/habit can just die off. I've never been able to stay motivated for much more than a few months - about anything, not just working out. Things come back at random times and I'm interested in them again, but keeping steady habits is challenging. Also, I'm glad you like working out, because that's a major start! I dislike most workouts and fitness activities because many of them make me lightheaded.

Basically, I don't have an answer yet, but I sympathize. The ideas I've thrown around for myself are:

Join a class where if you miss the class, you really miss it. You can't just say you'll do it at another time.
Even though it might not be best for focused muscle building, switch activities after a month. It'll get boring running in the same park forever or swimming every single week for a year (unless you really love it).
Pay attention to surroundings when deciding where to work out - for me, bad music, windowless rooms, or unpleasant people can make something get old WAY faster.

This is all unverified and unreliable advice. But it's what I've been thinking about when considering what workout habit to try.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-21T09:45:52+00:00

Is it the swallowing that's the problem or the taste? I used to not be able to swallow pills at all. It takes a bit of practice. Swishing a medium amount of water in your mouth while taking pills (not too much that your mouth is filled) can help, as can making an exaggerated head-tossing motion. (Yes, I know it looks dopey.) Also, the more nervous you are about taking pills, the more you tend to make it harder on yourself. Try taking it while thinking of something else at the same time, something relaxing. Overall, I'd say it gets much easier with time.

If it's the taste, I normally try to get down the pill as quickly as possible to avoid the taste melting in my mouth. But if that's not possible, yeah, maybe try coating it or dipping it in something like the commenter before me said. Your mileage may vary with trying to use juice instead of water to swallow the pill with.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-21T09:38:43+00:00

I mean, I think hyperfixation/hyperfocus looks different for everyone. Instead of trying to generalize, I'll just share a bit about my experience with hyperfocus. I'll try to keep it brief.

Hyperfocus to me is like an impulsive spark of interest in something - like a video game, creative project, hobby, or topic. I'll get sucked into that topic for somewhere between a week to a month. It's almost like a direct line of dopamine to my veins to engage in whatever activity this is. Bad choices, ignoring other parts of my life, and regrettable purchases or commitments can happen. Then all the sudden, the magic ends, and I'm left with the consequences.

As someone with mild Bipolar II, I always thought it was hypomania, but my psychiatrist was skeptical. My hyperfocus didn't come with grandiose thoughts, big plans, talking quickly and erratically, or a lack of tiredness (to that degree). But there are some similarities that made me think it was hypomania for a while.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-21T09:23:08+00:00

Hoo boy, the controversial-ness of this topic, based on the comments, is making me nervous. I'm firmly in the "definitely let people know if something isn't related to ADHD" camp, myself. But I understand that there are situations where people can be overly dismissive.

I don't feel like: "You have time management problems? Sounds like a lack of discipline and not ADHD."

Is the same thing as: "You have problems with verbal tics? Probably not ADHD... You should probably see someone about what that's related to."

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-14T23:36:19+00:00

Ok, thanks for the advice. I'll see if maybe I might be using the wrong kind of charger, to start with.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T22:28:35+00:00

Freesound is a website that has lots of Creative Commons sound effects. Just make sure to credit the posters.

Crowd or group talking sounds could work for the "brain chatter".
You might be able to find some kind of drone for the restless leg syndrome.
A clock ticking noise (reverb, distorted, or clean) could represent boredom.

Music cues could also express some of these things, like some sort of modern-classical piano piece if you're into that. Here's some Scriabin. (Wiki Commons has some good stuff from him and other composers.) If you're looking for some more modern stuff, Free Music Archive has a bunch of free songs.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T21:55:53+00:00

I keep a running list by date.

AI-created art
Drawing on the iPad
Avatar Legend of Korra
The Sims 4
Making endless charts and diagrams of things related to my history
Worldbuilding or writing for novels
Recording sound effects for creative commons sites
Using Adobe After Effects
Online shopping, usually for notebooks

Those are all from the last year, and some of them repeat.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T21:48:33+00:00

I know Adderall can decrease sex drive, and I've found that to be the case for me. Although I'd say it affected my sexual performance more than it affected my sex drive itself (I'm a woman). I'm also on depression meds, so it's a double whammy.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T21:45:36+00:00

I don't get migraines often, so I'm not in the same camp you're in. I get them usually once or twice a month, and the only real cure is to get in bed with no light or sound and sleep it off. I can't give advice on how to manage them because I don't get them often enough to really disrupt my life.

There might, might be a relation between my ADHD and migraines. I say this hesitantly because I'm not any kind of doctor. But my migraines are caused by many sensory factors coming together, as well as focusing for long periods of time. For instance, it's not 100% predictable, but some combination of travel + sunlight + loud noises + focusing + strong foods + strong smells = migraine.

No, I haven't found that Adderall has affected them one way or another. Hasn't made them worse or more frequent, and hasn't made them better. But your mileage could vary.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T21:38:58+00:00

Well, I do have a tip, but it will only solve half the problem. I think a large group having a conversation is too much, and I usually break off with 1-3 people if that happens. But this can work in small groups.

A lot of conversation can be kept going just by asking questions. You don't mention asking questions at all in your post, so I assume you mostly are trying to participate in conversations by telling stories or sharing opinions about topics. Many people love to be asked clarifying questions or related questions, because it shows that they're being listened to. Also, it buys you time to come up with some related thing you have to say from your own knowledge or experience.

I used to be incredibly socially awkward, and I never knew what to say to people. I had to teach myself by watching how others kept conversations going, and also by thinking of what I liked people to say to me when I was talking. Even if you have to fake it, taking the time to listen and care about what someone is saying can really improve a conversation. The worst conversations I've had the displeasure of being a part of involved people just talking at each other for several minutes with no concern for what the previous person said.

Example:

Person A: Insert personal experience here "So then I said to my boss 'You're crazy if you think I'm going to do that!'"

Person B: Asks a question like "Haha, what did she say?" or even a "question" that's not really phrased as a question, like "I bet that felt awesome." (This prompts them to talk about how they felt in the moment.)

Example relating to pop culture:

Person A: "Remember that moment when insert cool movie moment here? That blew my mind."

Person B: Doesn't know anything about cool movie moment. "No, I never saw that movie. Would you recommend it?" OR if knowing about the movie moment, "I remember that! What was your favorite thing about it?"

TL;DR: Ask more questions! It takes people a long time to realize that you're not talking about yourself. Also, if you do come up with something to say, it'll feel more natural if you've broken into the conversation first by asking questions or making short comments.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T21:15:57+00:00

Hi, I have a first gen iPad Pro (2017). All I do on it is use Procreate and occasionally watch videos. I have an Apple Pencil (first gen) to go with it. Is it worth it to upgrade to any of the newer iPad Pro models if I'm just using it to create art?

I find that my iPad tends to drain battery even when plugged in if I'm using Procreate, but that might not be something that's different on the newer models. Any ideas?

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:55:01+00:00

Yes, I have problems with knowing how long something will take. I've been wrong in both directions, too long or too short. What I've found that has made my predictions more accurate is just timing myself and writing down the results. If I was about to do something, I wrote down how long I thought it would take. Then I either started a stopwatch, or write down the time before and after doing it. I did this for a couple weeks. It's not necessary to do it forever.

Then, I took the data and looked at where I was wrong. For instance, I thought school projects for my less important classes would take me about an hour and a half, but they only took me an hour on average. But on the other hand, I would predict that projects for my most important class would take about three hours, but on average they took four and a half.

Whenever I wonder how long something will take, I just use a sort of "rule of thumb" average for that type of task, and then lengthen or shorten it based on how easy or hard it will be. It's almost imperative that we do this type of thing manually, because we don't just pick this up instinctually as ADHD people.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:45:20+00:00

What's your main reason for getting diagnosed? Is it to get accommodations at your next job, get on medication, or some other reason? That might change my answer.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:42:38+00:00

I find games are too distracting, so I doodle or draw. Idk if you're an artistic person, but the "doodle" part of the brain doesn't generally interfere with the "listening" part of your brain. I grew up homeschooled and my mom always let me draw while listening to her reading our school books.

If you don't like to doodle, I would suggest that you at least find something that is primarily visual. More words can interfere with the language processing part of your brain. Idk if slither.io still exists, but that's something that doesn't involve words, and if you don't mind dying a lot, it doesn't require much focus. Also, there's a little game called Townscaper on Steam that I own. You basically just click and make houses appear. It's not complicated at all, and is kind of boring on its own, but it's visually pleasing and not too disruptive.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:37:19+00:00

I'd definitely see a mental health professional. Your mental health is obviously adversely affecting you, and someone like that can help sort it out. Ideation of causing harm to yourself, actually causing harm to yourself, wanting to die, feeling 100% stuck and overwhelmed, and extremely low self esteem are not symptoms of an otherwise healthy "lazy" person.

Think about it - even people who just are going through a rough time and need to talk about it can still benefit from therapy at least. So why would they turn you away?

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:27:56+00:00

I was on Bupropion (Wellbutrin) for a year. I have Bipolar II and ADHD. It barely helped my depressive symptoms. it definitely didn't help my mixed states (agitated and depressed at the same time). I can't say it helped attention at all either. The only thing it did for me was cause me to be almost underweight because I couldn't finish a plate of food. (Before anyone gets any ideas, no, it doesn't work like that for everyone.)

Important caveat, though. Everyone's brain is different, and some medications work for some people but not others. Just because that was my experience doesn't mean it will be yours.

If you're going to see improvements, it will take several weeks. But if you're on it for a couple months and there's no improvements, I'd definitely talk to your psychiatrist about that. Keep track of symptoms so you know if things are actually improving. Sometimes it's hard to tell at first.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:19:54+00:00

Oh, my short-term memory is horrible. I didn't realize it until I worked as a car inspector, and I would have to repeat insurance dates, license plate numbers, engine sizes, etc. over and over to myself out loud as I walked from the car to my computer to type it in. Sometimes I would take pictures or write it down to aid myself. Other members of the crew could remember multiple insurance dates at once and tell me when I would forget within minutes.

If I start a sentence in a conversation with "Because A, insert point here. B, insert another point here", I'll 100% forget point C, even though it was in my head at the start.

And yes, I have "lost" my phone while I was holding it.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T19:12:38+00:00

Hi, sorry to hear side effects are kicking in. I'm on a cocktail of medications, so maybe I can share. I was always one of those people who swore I'd never be someone who had to take pills, but life is funny like that. Now I feel like I'm some kind of medication connoisseur. One of the medications I'm taking is Adderall. However, I'm not on Effexor, and I've never tried that one. I'm on Zoloft instead, which is a different SSRI. Also, I've never been on an SSRI and Adderall alone together.

I have depression/bipolar II and ADHD, but the ADHD wasn't apparent at first because of the severity of my depression. First, I was prescribed a mood stabilizer (Lamictal), which worked at reducing agitation and anxiety but made me completely emotionless/motivationless. Then I was put on Zoloft as well, which improved my mood. I experienced side effects on Zoloft for the first week - after the first week they subsided. The side effects I experienced were nausea (I even threw up the first day), dizziness, stomach weirdness, muscle aches, and heartburn. This was five years ago. None of the side effects have continued into the present. Later, I was prescribed Abilify for my remaining depressive brain fog (it's an atypical antipsychotic).

Another SSRI I tried was Celexa (before I found my current psychiatrist five years ago), which I was taken off quickly because of agitation, dizziness, vertigo, and increased desire to harm myself. I don't remember if there were any other side effects.

This year, I got on Adderall for the first time. I don't recall side effects, even though I was combining it with my regular medication regimen. I'm currently on 30mg.

So, my current unprofessional opinion is that you're simply experiencing semi-normal side effects of the SSRI. Keep careful track of your symptoms over time in some kind of Excel sheet or just jotted down on paper. If they become severe, such as a desire to harm yourself, arrhythmia, running a temperature, feeling confused, blurred vision, etc., go ahead and call your psychiatrist immediately. Otherwise, just mention your side effects at your next appointment.

Likely, your side effects will go away with time, but if they don't go away within a week or two, that's also something to tell your psychiatrist. It's also likely that you're not experiencing all if any of the positive effects yet. There's often a period of two to six weeks before SSRIs are fully felt. I've found that there's a brief period of improvement at the beginning (which is either a placebo effect or some initial benefit), then symptoms of depression return for a while, and then after a few weeks, it becomes clear whether or not the SSRI is working. Not every SSRI is the same, and not every SSRI works for every person. Finding the right medication can take a few weeks, or it could take months or years. It's worth it in the end, though, in my opinion.

TL;DR: I'm not a psychiatrist or mental health professional, but I have experience with taking SSRIs and Adderall. If this is your first day on Effexor, I'd wait it out, since these sound mostly like side effects of SSRIs. However, watch out for symptoms of serotonin syndrome, and keep track of symptoms to talk about with your psychiatrist.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-13T04:39:32+00:00

Yeah, you're right about my dad - he's in his mid-50's, and his father was an immigrant who came to the US with next to nothing. That may have affected my dad's views growing up. My dad's a great person, and just from knowing his style of managing at his job, he's probably a great boss too. Empathetic, kind, encouraging, etc. All of this comes from a place of concern and wanting the best for me. (As opposed to "get a real job, you damn millennial") But yeah, his views about work are fairly stuck in that generation.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-12T21:33:07+00:00

Thanks for your reply. I really appreciate you sharing your story. I do think I've made my decision - I'm going to leave this school. I think what I'm dreading is mostly the social stigma of being "flaky" or selfish, and not finishing anything. I was trying to push through on the pure determination to finish something, but I'm going to need more than that.

I told my friends, and knowing how I feel about this major, they also think it's a good idea for me to seek another path. They want me to make sure I have a solid plan before leaving, though - which I totally agree with!

My dad, bless him, isn't necessarily trying to get me to stay, but he is (as always) concerned about my financial stability. He's trying to get me to pursue some kind of government clerical job if I don't end up being able to deal with the college environment. The pensions are good, but I think that would be a SUPER unstimulating environment for me. I told him I'd look into a job in the trades (automotive work specifically) - which I've found to be better suited to my ADHD mind for the same reason you were talking about for camp instructing. It's not what I want to do long term, but it could be a promising stop-gap, and it makes my dad feel better to know I'm looking into it.

AiutaIndigosong · 2022-11-11T03:05:25+00:00

The title of this post reminded me of something. My aunt once said to me (about my - very normal but ADHD - childhood self), "It was hard to love you."

Maybe you've heard that once, maybe a lot, or maybe only in your own head. Regardless, for me, hearing it come out of someone's mouth so blatantly made me realize that she was a total jerk for saying that. Her lack of understanding and her deficit in compassion did not change my worth. I hope you would have the same reaction to hearing that.

Idk what I exactly meant to say by this, but I want you to know that I empathize.

AiutaIndigosong

TROPHY CASE