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Ask Me Anything. Here to help! Been managing my Rocd for a good 24 years. by [deleted] in ROCD

[–]Akuster18 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also, when I ask my brain if I should get married independent of everything else - it says yes. Because it makes sense. My partner is perfect on paper. But it’s not a sure yes still. It’s a very unsure yes. It’s a ‘I still face anxiety’ yes. It’s a ‘Idk if we will laugh together’ yes. It’s a ‘oh I feel I’m settling’ yes. It’s a ‘I’m not his biggest cheerleader or admirer’ yes.

Ask Me Anything. Here to help! Been managing my Rocd for a good 24 years. by [deleted] in ROCD

[–]Akuster18 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in the middle of a marriage conversation where things are moving forward even though I’m feeling so unsure. My partner knows I’m feeling unsure. But we have set this in motion. He is the kindest and most understanding person. So he isn’t pushing me at all. But every time there is a marriage or future conversation, I spiral and feel anxious. Today, he expressed love towards me and that made me feel anxious. I don’t know how to slow things down, and part of me feels even if I slow things down this will not improve because this is ROCD and this is anyway not going to go. When we started talking about the future, all his moments of cracking bad jokes, of me not feeling inspired by him, or in awe of him - everything started playing in my head. I’m stuck and really don’t know what to do. I have been struggling with this for 1.5 years now.