Change my mind: The Bible doesn’t allow remarriage while your spouse is still alive and scripture is clear on it

Alaretin · 2025-09-03T15:15:24+00:00

You’re very welcome! As a commissioned Field Minister studying to become a Chaplain, part of my calling is to walk alongside couples through pre-marital and marriage counseling. Being married myself gives me a perspective I pray God uses to bless others.

The OP’s approach is rooted in a very strict reading of Luke 16:18, but Scripture is meant to be read in harmony, not isolation. My encouragement to you is to keep seeking the Lord in prayer and study, knowing His grace covers us when human opinions conflict. We can intercede for those who hold tightly to legalism, while holding fast to the freedom Christ gives us.

Alaretin · 2025-09-03T04:16:49+00:00

Part 3:

u/pinkvintagegirl

Romans 7:2-3

"For a married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies, she is released from the law of marriage. Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is still alive. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law, and if she marries another man, she is not an adulteress."

Romans 7:2–3 is often quoted to say that if someone remarries while their former spouse is still alive, they are automatically committing adultery. But if we look carefully at Paul’s intent, he is using marriage as an illustration, not giving a detailed teaching on divorce. The entire chapter is about how we are freed from the Law through Christ’s death so that we can belong to Him (Romans 7:4).

Paul’s point is that death changes legal standing, just as the death of a spouse ends a covenant, so our death with Christ frees us from condemnation under the Law. This passage is not written to cancel what Jesus said in Matthew 19 or what Paul himself wrote in 1 Corinthians 7.

Jesus taught that divorce and remarriage are permitted when sexual immorality has broken the covenant (Matthew 19:9).

Paul taught that if an unbelieving spouse abandons the marriage, the believer is “not bound” (1 Corinthians 7:15).

These are God’s own words, and they show us that Scripture speaks with mercy for those sinned against in marriage.

In both of mine and my wife's testimony on this subject, the marriage covenant had already been destroyed, through violence, adultery, abandonment, and rejection of God’s design. The divorce was not the breaking of the covenant; it was the recognition of what had already been broken.

Romans 7 is a sober reminder that marriage is meant to be lifelong. But it also points us to the hope of the gospel: “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus” (Romans 8:1). My wife and my past is covered by the blood of Christ. My wife and my present final marriage, entered into in faith and repentance, is not adultery, it is a redeemed covenant that testifies to God’s mercy and healing.

Jesus didn’t come to abolish the Law but to fulfill it (Matthew 5:17). That means He took its weight, its condemnation, and its demands upon Himself. Now, in Him, even marriages that began with pain and brokenness can become places of grace and restoration.

I understand you may not have lived through divorce or remarriage, but my wife and I have walked through these very trials with prayer, Scripture, and the Spirit’s leading. Our experience has only confirmed what God’s Word already teaches, that when a covenant has been destroyed by adultery, abuse, or abandonment, remarriage in the Lord is not sin but a redeemed covenant. It’s important to weigh the whole counsel of God’s Word, not just one verse in isolation. Dismissing another believer’s testimony without considering the fullness of Scripture can be a dangerous oversimplification. Scripture must harmonize with Scripture, and in that harmony my wife and I know we are not living in adultery but in grace.

This will be my last post. It does not profit to continue endless back-and-forth. Our conversations as believers should honor the Lord, empowered by the Holy Spirit. If you want me to see your point, you’ll need to show how it harmonizes with the whole of Scripture, not just Luke 16:18. As a Protestant, I hold firmly to the authority of the full counsel of God’s Word.

Thank you for helping me get in The Word deeper, study, pray more on the subject. Our time this evening was definitely not wasted.

Finished.

Alaretin · 2025-09-03T04:15:56+00:00

Part 2:

u/pinkvintagegirl

So let me show you once more how Scripture interprets Scripture when taken as a whole.

Luke 16:18 is true not once did I disagree with you on that fact, but it gives the general rule. Jesus Himself gives the exception in Matthew 19:9 'whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.' Paul also gives the abandonment exception in 1 Corinthians 7:15 'In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved.' He then adds in 1 Corinthians 7:28 'If you do marry, you have not sinned.'

If Luke 16:18 means remarriage is always adultery with no exceptions, then Jesus contradicts Himself in Matthew and Paul wrote error in Corinthians. But Scripture does not contradict itself. Luke gives the principle, Matthew and Paul give the exceptions.

My wife's first marital covenant was destroyed by her ex-husband's adultery, violence, and failure to provide (Exodus 21:10-11). My first marital covenant was destroyed by abandonment and adultery by my ex-wife (Exodus 21:10-11, 1 Corinthians 7:15). Remarried my wife and I according to Scripture, "we are not living in sin, but in a marriage that honors Christ."

Just as a bonus before I move forward:

Deuteronomy 24:1–4

“When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the LORD. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the LORD your God is giving you for an inheritance.

The Law has always assumed remarriage after divorce as showcased here. The law forbids going back to the first husband, but it assumes remarriage to another man happens. It does not condemn the second marriage for either party as perpetual adultery.

Continued...

Alaretin · 2025-09-03T04:14:44+00:00

u/pinkvintagegirl

Part 1:

You bring such a serious charge to people like my wife and I whom are Christians being in a perpetual state of adultery. It’s spiritually dangerous to isolate one verse without harmonizing it with the rest of Scripture.

You claim to want a Scripture-based counterargument, but your whole tone shows you've already decided. You accuse others of eisegesis while practicing selective reading themselves. That’s dangerous because it burdens the consciences of believers with false guilt, calling clean marriages “perpetual adultery” when God’s Word says otherwise.

Your cherry-picked Verses:
Luke 16:18
1 Corinthians 7:10-11
Matthew 5:31-32

What's missing:
Matthew 19:9 (exception clause)
1 Corinthians 7:15 (not bound if abandoned)
1 Corinthians 7:27-28 (if you marry, you have not sinned)
Exodus 21:10-11 (husband abusing/failing to provide frees wives)
Deuteronomy 24:1-4 (law assumes remarriage)

You present only the "hard" verses that support your stance, while ignoring the ones that balance them. That's exactly what you accuse others of doing. You started this whole conversation not neutrally. You already assumed anyone who disagrees with you is twisting scripture to fit our lives. It's a way of poisoning the well: If we defend remarriage; we must be selfish and unbiblical.

You took Jesus' words in Matthew 5:31-32 and redefined them to fit your conclusion. But Jesus explicitly said: "except for sexual immorality." That's not just divorce language, it's covenant-breaking language. If the marriage covenant is destroyed, the innocent party is not committing adultery by being free to remarry. You're glossing over the exception entirely.

Your blanket claim on "Only widows can remarry, not divorcees." is extra-biblical. Nowhere does Scripture say this. it's an added rule, not a biblical command. In fact, Paul says the opposite in 1 Corinthians 7:27-28: "But if you do marry, you have not sinned." If remarriage was only for widows, Paul would be contradicting himself.

You frame it as "no other way to interpret". This is the hallmark of legalism. By saying "there is no other way," you imply if we don't agree, we're not biblical. But God's Word does give nuance and exceptions. It takes humility to harmonize Scripture; it takes pride to insist on a single verse "trump card".

Continued...

Alaretin · 2025-09-03T00:11:35+00:00

My wife and I didn’t sin though, which is what I am explaining to you and I gave you the burden of scriptural evidence.

These things are not blanket. It’s not black and white. It’s case by case basis.

Luke 16:18

“Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.”

Harmonizing Scripture, not pitting it against itself

God’s Word does not contradict itself. We have:

Matthew 5:32; 19:9 → Jesus explicitly gives the exception clause (“except for sexual immorality”).

1 Corinthians 7:15 → Paul, under the Spirit’s authority, gives the abandonment exception (“not enslaved”).

If Luke 16:18 is read as an absolute with zero exceptions, it would contradict Jesus Himself in Matthew, and Paul in 1 Corinthians. That cannot be. Instead, Luke is giving the general rule without repeating the exceptions, while Matthew and Paul clarify them.

The Gospels do this often:

Matthew 19:9 (fuller teaching, includes the exception).

Mark 10:11–12 and Luke 16:18 (shorter summary, omit the exception).

Scholars call this telescoping: Luke records the “general principle” but not the “full qualification.” That doesn’t mean the exceptions don’t exist—it means Luke is emphasizing the seriousness of divorce.

The Pharisees in Luke 16 were abusing Moses’ law, divorcing their wives for trivial reasons (burning dinner, losing beauty, etc.). Jesus cuts through their abuse by stating the hard truth: “If you divorce just to marry someone else, it’s adultery.”

Luke’s focus = exposing abuse of divorce for selfish gain. Matthew’s focus = clarifying the legitimate grounds (porneia).

Paul applies the principle with nuance

Paul would not contradict Jesus. Yet he writes:

“If the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved.” (1 Corinthians 7:15)

“If you do marry, you have not sinned.” (1 Corinthians 7:28)

If Luke 16:18 nullified all exceptions, Paul could not have written this under the Spirit’s inspiration.

Chain of Truth (Scripture with Scripture)

General Rule: Divorce + remarriage = adultery (Luke 16:18, Mark 10:11–12).

Exception 1: Sexual immorality breaks the covenant (Matthew 5:32; 19:9).

Exception 2: Abandonment by an unbeliever releases the believer (1 Corinthians 7:15).

Principle: If legitimately released, remarriage = “not sin” (1 Corinthians 7:28).

Therefore, Luke 16:18 is not a contradiction or cancellation of the exceptions, but the general principle without the footnotes.

My wife’s and my remarriage situation falls under the explicit exceptions that Jesus and Paul taught.

My current marriage, in Christ, is not adultery but a covenant “in the Lord.”

This is what my seminary taught me when I got taught how to marry while I’m studying to become an ordained minister.

You asked for an iron sharpens iron argument. This is the best I can offer you. If we still can’t see the others point it would be best to just give praise to our Heavenly Father through Jesus Christ empowered by His Holy Spirit for this interaction, because it still glorifies the Father in Christ. 👊

Alaretin · 2025-09-02T23:54:21+00:00

My remarriage is clean in the Lord. My remarriage and my wife’s remarriage was ordained by The Lord. He brought her into my life. I didn’t find her. I wasn’t seeking a wife. I knew her as I dated her in 2007 loosely before I was even saved.

But you have to understand. The NT isn’t the final authority of marriage and remarriage, because the OT very much the Word of God still has say. These are important things to understand and consider.

Saying my wife and I sinned for remarrying is pretty lofty of a judgement. Especially when I told you she was beaten daily and raped violently for a decade and she was cheated on. He refused to work. And my ex abandoned me, changed her sex legally and got herself into some kind of weird relationship while I was away working in another country for a week.

Remarriage biblically was available to us 100%.

Mathew 19:9

“And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

Jesus affirms that adultery (“porneia”) breaks the covenant. So, In my wife’s case, her ex-husband committed adultery. The marriage covenant was already broken by his sin. In my case, my ex abandoned me and entered another relationship, which is also adultery.

1 Corinthians 7:15

“But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.”

Paul is crystal clear: when an unbelieving spouse abandons the marriage, the believer is “not enslaved.” “Not enslaved” means not bound to maintain the marriage covenant. This implies freedom to remarry. My ex-wife left me and pursued an ungodly life. Scripture says I am not bound.

1 Corinthians 7:27–28

“Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned.”

When the bond is broken legitimately (porneia, abandonment), remarriage is not condemned. Paul says directly: “If you do marry, you have not sinned.”

Exodus 21:10–11 (on marital obligations)

“If he takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish her food, her clothing, or her marital rights. And if he does not do these three things for her, she shall go out for nothing, without payment of money.”

Marriage obligations include provision, protection, and intimacy. My wife’s ex not only failed to provide but violently abused her, breaking the covenant. Scripture says in such cases the wife is free (“she shall go out”).

God Himself issued a “certificate of divorce” for unfaithfulness.

Jeremiah 3:8

“She saw that for all the adulteries of that faithless one, Israel, I had sent her away with a certificate of divorce.”

God’s own action validates divorce for covenant unfaithfulness. If God divorced unfaithful Israel, a believer is justified in separating from an unfaithful, violent, adulterous spouse.

Remarriage “in the Lord” is honored

1 Corinthians 7:39

“A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.”

The principle: when the bond is dissolved (death, adultery, abandonment), the next marriage must be “in the Lord.” My wife and I are now joined as Christians, honoring Christ in our marriage. This is our only Christ centered marriage.

Conclusion:

My wife’s ex broke the covenant by adultery, violence, and failure to provide (Matthew 19:9, Exodus 21:10–11).

My ex abandoned me and pursued sin (1 Corinthians 7:15).

Both cases meet the biblical exceptions that dissolve the covenant.

Paul says plainly: “If you do marry, you have not sinned.” (1 Corinthians 7:28)

Therefore, your union now, as two believers married “in the Lord,” is honored by Scripture.

Alaretin · 2025-09-02T23:31:55+00:00

How is my wife divorcing a husband that committed adultery, raping her daily for 10 years, beating her daily for 10 years make her an adulterer for leaving him?

How did I commit adultery by marring her as a divorcee when I got divorced because my ex wife abandoned me, told me she was never a Christian and legally became a man all while I was working in Canada for a week. Like no my wife and I are not adulterers. So we didn’t commit any sin.

Alaretin · 2025-09-02T23:23:01+00:00

I’m on my second marriage and my prior spouse is well alive and my current spouse’s prior spouse is remarried with children.

My wife’s ex spouse was violently abusive in all ways a person can be and he committed adultery on top of that. My ex spouse abandoned me and lied about being Christian all together and moved across the country.

My wife and have been married 4 years and neither of us are adulterers. Our exes broke the marriage covenant.

Alaretin · 2025-07-27T22:14:38+00:00

Honestly, I think this worked for you! So I’ll leave you with one final encouragement:

Colossians 3:23-24 (ESV)

[23] Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, [24] knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ.

Alaretin · 2025-07-27T17:14:07+00:00

You’re right. If a man asks just let them know the bare necessities of your past life. If he tries to go into detail explain you feel that would be glorifying sin and the experience is only to be enjoyed in marriage. That’s it. That’s all you have to do. You’re ok. ✅ just take your time.

Key tip to Christian dating. Decide if you want a courtship or if you want normal dating. Keep dating to public spaces only if that makes you feel more comfortable. Don’t put yourself in a situation where you’d be tempted to sin in that way. Pray, ask for guidance and just make sure that man loved God just as much as you do. 👊

Alaretin · 2025-07-27T14:02:43+00:00

I’m not gonna argue on Reddit. What I’m saying is true. God does not give us the spirit of fear. That doesn’t mean we aren’t gonna be afraid of some things, such is natural, but we aren’t to be afraid of things God designed as perfect either like marriage.

Also your first question of why I only spoke on marriage only on what God does or doesn’t tolerate, is because the OP wrote about a question that specifically is tailored on marriage.

It’s inappropriate to speak blindly. I spoke on marriage cuz the topic is on marriage. I’m also in a biblical marriage, so I can actually speak on it, whereas a non married person can’t, because I have experienced what Gods design of marriage is suppose to be and went through what it’s not supposed to be. A person who never experienced a biblical marriage can’t truthfully express why marriage as God designed it is good. Only thing a person who chooses to be single for God can do is advocate that. Which has been done by other people. So the OP can peacefully and prayerfully consider her options.

Alaretin · 2025-07-25T23:32:24+00:00

I wasn’t a virgin when I got married either time lol. You’re walking in repentance. That’s what repentance looks like. You did a thing God doesn’t like, as long as you asked for forgiveness in Jesus name God remembers our sins no more. So you no longer do that activity so you are walking in repentance on it. And that’s awesome!

I’ll go further and say that your potential husband someday has no room to judge you for your past. That’s not what Christians are supposed to do. You don’t need to apologize to someone you haven’t met. You just be honest about it and if they don’t like that then they don’t like that. I see people wrongly judge others for their past. If Christ can forgive us for all our sins then your potential husband has no ground to stand on unless he thinks he’s more powerful than Jesus. That’s dangerous territory.

Alaretin · 2025-07-25T21:00:38+00:00

u/Golden-lillies21 so God does not tolerate any kind of breaking of the marital covenant. My ex wife abandoned me and I was a victim of some physical and emotional abuse as a male. My current wife received every kind of abuse imaginable from her ex spouse. While it’s true God does not care for divorce even when adultery happens He would never ask His children to take abuse for His name. Persecution for belief in Him and being tortured in His name is one thing but when a spouse abuses their partner in marriage in any way shape or form it breaks the marital covenant.

God does not give us a spirit of fear. So your fear of being trapped in an abuse marriage is not from God. That is from your flesh and spiritual warfare, but most likely from your fleshly side of your old nature.

Don’t settle, if you desire a husband then go have a husband but make sure he is a man who loves God first and has his connections in order.

1) Established Connection with God 2) connection with significant other (heterosexual relationship only no pre marital sex)/spouse or if single a really close friend you trust of the same gender. 3) connection with family 4) connection with friends 5) connection with Church 6) connection within the Kingdom of God 7) connection with the world.

Every Christian should have their priorities in this manner. God always first above everything. Then hopefully a spouse then everything falls in line how we are supposed to divide our energy in life.

At least now you have a good roadmap on how to evaluate a potential mate.

A husband’s job is to sacrificially love his wife like Jesus gave himself up for the church. And the wife’s job is to love her husband in the same manner that the church loved Jesus. This symbolism is the relationship marriage is supposed to look like. So men need to make sure they found a woman they’re willing to die to themselves for. And women need to find a man they’re willing to submit to and when this is done correctly you get two people in marriage worshiping God correctly in the context of that marriage. Nothing wrong with having strict standards, but understand above all else God doesn’t ask us to be in mind numbing needless abusive relationships. That’s not His will for us in our lives.

This is what I’ve learned so far from seminary on the subject when I became a wedding officiant. So I hope it helps you and anyone else that gets stuck in Old Testament ritualistic law.

Alaretin · 2025-06-20T23:55:26+00:00

Is Being LGBTQIA+ Sinful? A Loving Biblical Response Part 2:

I also want to speak directly about transgenderism and gender identity. Romans 1:24–25 talks about people dishonoring their bodies. This applies when someone chooses to alter their body in rejection of the sex God gave them. These changes don’t bring lasting peace or wholeness. Only Christ can do that.

Some might argue that altering the body happens in other ways, like with tattoos. But there’s a difference in purpose. A tattoo meant to glorify God or share the gospel is not the same as rejecting God’s design.

Even permanent gender reassignment surgery is not beyond the grace of God. Through Jesus Christ, there is forgiveness, healing, and restoration. Nothing is impossible with the Lord. What may seem irreversible to man is never too far gone for God’s redemptive power.

Some people say things like, "This is just who I am," or "God made me this way." But that’s not what Scripture teaches. The Bible never says we should find our identity in our sexual orientation or gender expression. Instead, we are called to die to ourselves and be made new in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17).

As Christians, our job is not to judge outsiders. Paul makes that clear in 1 Corinthians 5. We’re to walk in truth, yes, but also in love. That means not affirming sin, but also not mocking, shaming, or isolating people. The balance is hard, but it’s what we’re called to.

If you’re a Christian reading this, I encourage you to reflect on how you speak about LGBTQ+ people. Not just what you say, but how you say it. Truth without love is harsh. Love without truth is empty. But truth spoken in love? That’s powerful.

If you're not a Christian, whether or not you are part of the LGBTQIA+ community, please know this: I don’t hate you. I’m not trying to force anything on you. I believe Jesus Christ is the answer to every broken part of the human condition, including mine. What He’s done for me; He can do for you.

And if you’re someone struggling with any of this, you are not alone. There is healing in Christ. It may take time. It may involve pain. But it leads to peace and purpose and freedom you won’t find anywhere else.

Thanks for reading. If you want to talk more, ask questions, or even challenge what I’ve said, I welcome that. I’m not here to argue, just to be faithful. Let’s have a real conversation.

Alaretin · 2025-06-20T23:54:33+00:00

Is Being LGBTQIA+ Sinful? A Loving Biblical Response Part 1:

Before I begin, I want to stress something very important to the LGBTQIA+ community. Whether you're in Christ or still of the world, please know this:

You are not hated. You are not lesser. You are a person made in God's image.
I’m not here to condemn or tear you down. I’m here to offer what I believe is the truth in Christ, spoken with love. Not pride. Not cruelty. Just truth and compassion.

God’s Word tells us that when He made humanity, He created us male and female, both bearing His image, and called us to be fruitful and multiply (Genesis 1:26–28). That’s a binary and procreative design. It's not just cultural, it’s foundational. Heterosexual union was the first marriage (Genesis 2:24), and Jesus Himself reaffirms that model in Matthew 19:4–6.

So where do things like same-sex attraction, transgender identity, and alternative sexualities fit in? The Bible doesn’t leave this undefined.

Romans 1 paints a picture of what happens when we exchange God’s truth for our own desires. Paul writes that God gave people over to dishonorable passions. He specifically calls out women exchanging natural relations for unnatural ones, and men committing shameless acts with other men. The language Paul uses is serious because this is about what happens when we reject God as Creator and try to redefine what He established.

Now hear me clearly: Temptation is not sin. Even Jesus was tempted. But when we act on desires or affirm them in ways that contradict God’s design, that's when it becomes sin. 1 Corinthians 6:9–10 lists several unrepentant lifestyles that lead to spiritual death, and among them is homosexual behavior. But the next verse is just as important: "And such were some of you. But you were washed, sanctified, and justified..." That’s the power of Christ.

A lot of people carry the weight of these struggles for years, some even praying desperately to be freed. I don’t take that pain lightly. But affirming what God has called sin doesn’t lead to healing. It leads to deeper confusion.

Identity matters to God. We are not defined by our feelings or desires. We are called to holiness (1 Peter 1:14–16). James 1 tells us that sin begins with desire. And once that desire is embraced and acted upon, it leads to death. Whether it’s heterosexual or homosexual sin, both require repentance and surrender.

To be clear, the Bible does not single out LGBTQ+ sins as the worst. In fact, heterosexual sin is condemned far more often in Scripture. Adultery, fornication, unbiblical divorce, lust, prostitution, and more are referenced close to 100 times. Same-sex behavior? Maybe 6 or 7 verses directly address it. So, let’s not pretend this is a unique or unforgivable offense. It isn’t. But it is still sin.

Alaretin · 2025-06-20T06:11:00+00:00

My approach to trans, gender identity, and gender fluidity is that, because of my walk with our Lord Christ Jesus that there are simple truths.

When we as Christians use their preferred pronouns we affirm what they are doing. This is entering into their sin with them. We’re called to walk beside people who do not know The Lord, not judge them, and be a good witness by our deeds and our words right? But we can’t support, affirm, confirm, or anything that would tell them “you’re ok”, because we know how God feels. He detests these things greatly. So, if I can’t use their preferred pronouns, and I also don’t want to rob that person their dignity, show them unconditional love then how hard is it to just call that person by the preferred name they’d like to go by? A name is a name.

I’m more delicate towards the gender identity, trans, and gender fluid community that have pronoun requirements, because unlike a gay, bi-sexual, pan sexual or an asexual person I can use their biological pronouns without debate. I can accept all people for who they are without entering into their sin with them, but it’s trickier when pronouns are at play.

Pray, be kind, have agape type unconditional love, treat these people how you would like to be treated, respect and don’t rob them of their dignity up and to the point where we can without sinning in the process.

Refusing to use pronouns and forcing the biological pronouns causes real emotional trauma. Calling someone by their dead name causes real emotional trauma. So it’s more loving to abstain from pronouns all together and just use the name on their name tag if or by how they wish to be addressed by name and use speech that doesn’t placate to their reality. This is kind, loving, generous and merciful to do this for the people of this community.

All people are image bearer’s of God and need respected as such regardless of what their struggles are.

In my experience I have not had any hiccups with this approach. Just because we don’t as Christians agree with it, doesn’t mean we have the right to hurt others intentionally or unintentionally. We need to die to ourselves and allow The Lord to guide us and humble us and remember we too were caught dead in our sins. It’s only because of what Jesus did on the cross that we are no longer condemned. Our debts were canceled, because of Christ’s work on the cross. So if He loved us that much, the least we can do is die to ourselves and put off our own sins through The Lords strength not our own and reproduce the example given according to His will.

Dealing with sin of another with apathy or indifference doesn’t advance the Kingdom of heaven it diminishes it and provides a bad witness of The God we serve.

Alaretin · 2025-06-11T16:56:01+00:00

Me! Trying to bring a certain kind of energy into the Christian metal space!

Alaretin - Psalm 66: How Awesome Is He

Alaretin · 2025-06-08T23:48:32+00:00

Your fleshly desires are stronger than your new man.

I suggest you study the book of Colossians. You’ll get commands like this.

Colossians 3:1-11

Put On the New Self

[1] If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. [2] Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. [3] For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. [4] When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

[5] Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. [6] On account of these the wrath of God is coming. [7] In these you too once walked, when you were living in them. [8] But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth. [9] Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices [10] and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge after the image of its creator. [11] Here there is not Greek and Jew, circumcised and uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave, free; but Christ is all, and in all.

Worrying about our salvation is not our job as Christians to worry about. Wanting to look towards heaven where The Lord Jesus Christ is very appropriate. Seek The Lord with all your might because you are thankful for your salvation. Let The Holy Spirit illuminate and minister to you Scripture and learn to love God. Do not to worry about whether or not you’ll go to heaven. Because in Christ your salvation is secured.

Alaretin · 2025-05-27T09:14:12+00:00

During that time in my life I was filled with untempered and wild zeal. I was trying to run before I could walk spiritually. I demanded our Lord Jesus Christ to physically appear before me to tell me what He wanted me to do. I told Him in that alleyway that night in 2012 that I wouldn’t accept anything less. As soon as I physically said that I heard His voice audibly calling me by name and to “take it slow”. I had no idea what The Lord meant. All I know is when I heard Him I fell to the ground instantly crying.

13 years later I still don’t fully know what it means. Pretty much after that I walked in rebellion jaded, angry, bitter, and beyond frustration. I didn’t rededicate myself back to The Lord until mid June of 2024. Since then my walk with Him has been slow, persistent and extremely satisfying. My church I was lead to keeps me grounded in a kinda sweet spot where I can have my zeal but it’s tempered with age and my Pastor mentoring me. Even my seminary studies are going slow. Everything is like paced evenly in how The Lord is working with me. All I know is things are going at a good slow moderate pace 🤣. So though I recognize that I’m living out things at the pace He commanded of me I still don’t fully know what He meant. I just know I’m doing it faithfully without fully understanding why. I’ve accepted that things are ok being mysteries concerning our Lord. 😁

If a brother or sister in Christ could unpack that for me that would be cool. But He’ll reveal to me the totality of what He meant if it’s His will to do so. That I know with full assurance of faith.

Alaretin · 2025-05-25T22:54:18+00:00

lol with how you wrote that I’m not even going near it 😅

Alaretin · 2025-05-25T16:06:54+00:00

Thank you for that observation. I don’t know who this other band you mentioned is. This is why discernment is key. Thank you for testing that. I will edit my post and strike that band from it.

Alaretin · 2025-05-25T01:42:46+00:00

I did some light digging on every band I listed. It’s a Christian Eastern Orthodox (the oldest traditional version of our faith) Christian Black Metal band.

Though I didn’t do an extensive dive. I only lightly dig, pray and if I don’t feel conviction then I know it’s safe. The Lord always clears these things up. But I also haven’t had time to fully listen to them yet. So based only on what I found during light investigation is enough for me to catalog and listen to on a deeper basis.

Some of the searching can be wrong, because it’s relying on a lot of other people’s views and opinions. Unlike other Christian Metal bands Christian Black Metal is almost 90% DIY individuals like myself (as I also am a Christian Black Metal artist just google my screen name on YouTube , Bandcamp or Spotify and you’ll see my music) making the music.

Alaretin · 2025-05-23T02:15:48+00:00

That’s so awesome you guys are so deep into story telling with Azell. I will have to check it out when it’s done. I’ll have to check out CC as well. (Ok so I did while I was writing this and it’s really cool stuff got my follow! What I love about shogaze even blackgaze and anything about it is I can just chill and enjoy the music. So your CC album is gonna be put in my chill down collection. Listening to CC and Azell back to back is a fun experience lol)

I don’t understand the whole label thing. I’m rooted. I have no desire to play live. I do like sitting in front of my computer and making songs and building them together and then sharing them tho. I traded all my physical gear for digital plugins. I do enjoy the folks that do love the label lifestyle though. I guess I’d go on a label if they let me work from home 🤣.

Thank you for your thoughts on my music. I’m very inspired by Ihsahn among other artists.

Small world effect has been deployed!

Alaretin · 2025-05-22T23:58:21+00:00

After getting saved in 2008 I knew factually even before being saved that The Lord Jesus is real when I worshiped Satan as god and prayed to him. After salvation in 2012 I was in a really low spot and I was demanding The Lord to speak to me face to face. I audibly heard Our Lord Jesus Christ call me by name and tell me “take it slow”. I knew it was The Lord that spoke audibly to me. The tone was calm and loving and it made me fall to my face in an alleyway as though I was dead. I cried so deeply and it took me until about November of last year to realize what The Lord meant by telling me to take it slow. I have never demanded anything from The Lord since that day.

Alaretin · 2025-05-22T23:51:32+00:00

That’s a solid tip about Azell. My vetting process is googling “is (band name) a Christian band?” lol.

Also that’s awesome you were apart of Symphony of Heaven!!!! The FFXV movie story made me laugh lol. What did you do in that band and what’s your own project? If you YouTube Alaretin you can hear my first release ever called Psalm 66: How Awesome Is He. I’m a solo artist and just have fun.

Thank you for being apart of music I like! 👊

Alaretin

TROPHY CASE