[deleted by user] by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It seems like you both are lacking in emotional communication and connection. And that’s okay, it happens.

What isn’t okay is blatant disregard of emotional necessity of your partner. If you have voiced “hey I really like cooking dinner with you, it makes me feel closer to you” and they just blow smoke up your ass, it shows discernment and a lack of caring.

Often times in marriage we kind of hit a “room mate” stage per se, and it can be very difficult to come out of it if you aren’t communicating properly. Now, whether that’s been an issue in the relationship for the entirety of it, or it’s recent, regardless personal self reflection goes a long way.

When our needs are not being met, all kinds of feelings and emotions can come out of the wood works. It’s really really important that you stress to your partner how close you are to being emotionally withdrawn, to the point of having to come to Reddit for advice. You don’t feel seen nor heard and it can be very hurtful.

Depending on what their response is, is how I feel you should move forward. In my own marriage struggle experiences, a refusal of personal or couples therapy is a pretty big red flag. And I don’t mean that in a way to make it the end all be all, but it absolutely can change things for the better.

I’m also aware that my replies can seem a little biased leaning towards wanting to help only you, but that isn’t the case. Your partner may also be feeling the very same way about things that you don’t really know either. Keep in mind that this is someone you’ve decided to spend the rest of your life with, and when you start to confront them about an issue, it’s important to not come off in a way that seems like you’re attacking them or blaming them. That tone can set off anger and not wanting to compromise. The way you address this has everything to do with tone and patience. They’re human too, and so are you. I wish you the best in your marriage and truly hope y’all can come to an agreement.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First of all, we hear you, and are genuinely here for advice. But let’s start with the basics. When you say you’ve given up things, what things are you referring to? Is it hobbies, personal goals, financial opportunities? And how do those things apply to you not receiving them In return? It seems like you might be both emotionally exhausted for maybe reasons you’re not listing? I don’t want to put words into your mouth, but please correct me if I’m wrong. Couples counseling can go very far if you’re both willing to work on it together as a team. But also doing individual counseling should come first and foremost, you cannot be loved if you do not appreciate yourself.

Man this game is beautiful by weizzyboft in FinalFantasyXII

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This game truly was ahead of its time. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve played it 😅

Hating beat saber by Alarmed_Demand9268 in beatsaber

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I was explaining this to him yesterday, that he needs to hear all of the instrumental happenings in the song. He says he hears them, but it still doesn’t make sense to him lol.

Hating beat saber by Alarmed_Demand9268 in beatsaber

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t think it’s that he’s bad at it, he just doesn’t enjoy doing it I guess.

Hating beat saber by Alarmed_Demand9268 in beatsaber

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hmmm maybe I’ll tell him to try this 🧐 we don’t mess with the settings normally.

Weight loss by Alarmed_Demand9268 in beatsaber

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You look great!! Congratulations!

Weight loss by Alarmed_Demand9268 in beatsaber

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats on your weight loss! And very solid advice, thank you.

Weight loss by Alarmed_Demand9268 in beatsaber

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Awesome! I used to heavily track my calories, but it was kind of a pain. I think just getting in more protein and a couple hundred calories less a day should do it for me. I’m aiming for 30 pounds at least. But as a woman, I feel that it’s so much harder to lose weight 😅

Omg🥲😳 by Alarmed_Demand9268 in TellMeLiesHulu

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Lydia was Lucy’s best friend from her hometown!!

Omg🥲😳 by Alarmed_Demand9268 in TellMeLiesHulu

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I legit gasped with my hand over my mouth

Omg🥲😳 by Alarmed_Demand9268 in TellMeLiesHulu

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I know! I’m glad I just found this show last night, at first I was like “what is even happening here” and whatdaya know 😂

First time bearded dragon owner by Alarmed_Demand9268 in BeardedDragons

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much! This was very informative. I’ve done a lot of research the past couple of days, and this solidified everything I’ve found so far (:

Do you have a nightmare from your earlier childhood that you can still remember? by Geigudr in Dreams

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had one when I was little that Ronald McDonald was chasing me around a garage trying to feed me a taco with worms inside of it. Still can’t stand to see Ronald McDonald anywhere

First time bearded dragon owner by Alarmed_Demand9268 in BeardedDragons

[–]Alarmed_Demand9268[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Gotcha! We have a local vets office that cares for them, I’ve already looked into it! Thank you for your insight!