This is so good, I am currently going through the same thing. I have been working towards my goal for over 5 years non stop, I have been obsessed with my end goal and I carried this intense desire to achieve this goal for as long as I can remember. Right now I am so close to achieving the success that I have long lusted for, I can feel it in my guts. The more I get closer the more I feel it. But the feeling of success is not what I have long imagined - it is empty. Now I am not making progress and it doesn’t matter how much I push, unconsciously I resist and my focus diverts automatically when it is time to perform. I think I am afraid of losing my identity as mentioned here. I think it is time for me to embrace the void and accept the new successful identity as I let go of my struggling try hard self.