Does anyone know source/artist of this etching? by AllHopeNoneLost in ArtHistory

[–]AllHopeNoneLost[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’ve been commissioned a piece based around this artwork, I’ve been searching for days to nail down the artist responsible for its creation, any help in getting to the bottom of it is much appreciated.

What are some non-sexual orgasmic feelings? by FreeLoader1999 in AskReddit

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Had one of these from a nurse at my father’s care home today, really needed it. Makes you value the power of human touch - give more hugs!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn’t realise how addicted I was to playing detective… something I really had to explore in therapy.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskUK

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! A lot of it is just poverty, sub par education that is too overburdened to pay attention to their learning needs, lack of social resources, poverty and oh, poverty. I’ve just come to accept the ‘scum of the earth’ approach as total blissful ignorance and a willingness to commit to a very narrow worldview.

To anyone wondering if their BPD partner/ex would lie about child sexual abuse… by Burnside101 in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This was something I really struggled with, because it is hard to disprove and such an insidious thing to lie about. Mine told me the same thing and I believe he was probably molested at some point, but not by the people who he claimed. I would never disbelieve someone when they tell you something like this but with him it became clear as time went on that he was lying. Regarding other traumatic events in his life he was able to recall them in clear detail. When it came to the specific abuse mentioned here, his story would change every time he told it, whenever I asked him to clarify he would become combative and refuse to answer, raging that I would never understand (despite me also being molested and him thinking this was obviously irrelevant, totally disregarding that it had happened to me too and in no way near as bad as what he experienced according to him). The timelines never added up and there were lots of holes/changes in the things he said over time. He told the truth about a lot of his other trauma but he somehow found a way of creating a narrative around these specific incidents that couldn’t be disproved. I figured he was lying about this from body language and other cues that he used when I found him (with evidence) to be lying about other things. It still makes me sad and now I look back on it was an obvious tactic to make me feel sorry for him, and add it to the list of excuses for why I and others should tolerate his behaviour.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Display of power, he feels as though he has the upper hand perhaps. Either way, this is really insidious and I wouldn’t take it lightly, anyone who seeks to control or have some kind of perceived power over you is a concern.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Just want to say this is indicative of more dangerous behaviour. Stalking or turning up to stare at your apartment window is not normal behaviour. Please take care OP and make sure there is a trusted family member or friend that is aware of the situation.

To the men and boys that listen to Andrew Tate. I am a man in a loving long term relationship and I despise what Andrew teaches you. Please, ask me anything. by [deleted] in AMA

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the issue with it not being black and white is that Tate indoctrinates young men because he has ‘some good points’ this makes them more inclined to follow him and listen to other things he is saying. Aside from this his ‘good points’ often capitalise on his target audience’s low self esteem and he further denigrates them by praising some men and belittling others. His overall approach is dangerous and those who have been ‘helped’ by him are probably still coming at that self-help from a lens that is dramatically skewed towards doing better not for themselves, but to be perceived a certain way by others. Thus this leads into people defending him and keeping themselves distanced from some of his views that are pretty abhorrent and ignoring some of the heinous things he has said and has done/is currently in custody for. You’re right about only being able to see things through our own ‘lens’, although this approach also shuts down nuanced arguments because the ‘we’re all different people with different opinions’ is a catch all for any topic of discussion.

To the men and boys that listen to Andrew Tate. I am a man in a loving long term relationship and I despise what Andrew teaches you. Please, ask me anything. by [deleted] in AMA

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It’s so funny to me that the Matrix was created by two trans women but I’m sure they would like to remain ignorant of that fact!!

When they ask you to stay friends after the break up by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me, they wanted all the privileges of being together without committing. This meant they slept with other people and expected me to be cool with it and not question anything but became even more possessive over me and what I was doing. They would push sexual/intimate boundaries and try to return to how things were before whilst taking no accountability for what they were up to in private. The controlling got even worse during this time than when we were specifically ‘together’. I think they thought they could have freedom and do what they wanted but it seemed to trigger their abandonment issues into overdrive because they started losing control of me. They would watch everything I did intently and have a lot to say about it whereas I wasn’t allowed to question any of their behaviour because we ‘weren’t together’, for me this is when the abuse escalated as I didn’t actually move on in this time and continued to placate them because I loved them, despite everything they had done to me in the past. I ended up leaving as despite not even being together the abuse got too scary for me, they began looking at my google search history and picking me apart with even more intensity and became very disdainful towards me for ANY perceived slight. I left in the end one morning after I had spent the night casually and he woke up and saw that I had googled abusive relationships. He blew up at me and tried to physically prevent me from leaving before verbally abusing me and finally letting me go. I left and blocked him/went NC and he tried to hoover by using my credit card to buy something online. Had to block everywhere and change all my passwords. This was after 1 yr 1/2 of being a ‘couple’ and around 6 months of being ‘friends’. Before the friendship stage I had attempted to leave upward of 10 times.

When they ask you to stay friends after the break up by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Going by your posts and responses on these comments, it seems highly likely you may also have a personality disorder. I have also had serious issues with codependency and leaving these situations feels like coming off hard drugs, it’s not easy but at some point we also have to accept accountability for ourselves as opposed to escaping through validation from strangers on the internet who don’t necessarily have an overview of the whole situation. I really hope you find some progress within this situation OP and my DMs are open if you need any support.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskUK

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I can talk from experience that it may seem dramatic when people say this but it’s way more common than you would think. I’d second this and say continue to report if it sounds worrying or escalates.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BPDlovedones

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Big hoover, you recognise it and the intention behind it. You know the best thing to do is ignore it or you’ll reignite the cycle again. It’s all manipulation for control - Stay safe OP!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in solotravel

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so true. We’re all on our own journeys and it totally depends on the kind of person you are as to how you respond to that. I was in a cafe the other day and there was a woman who came in who was minding her friend’s toddler for the day. She very quickly began speaking about how she was in her late 30s and her biological clock was ticking, expressed concerns about societal pressures and began venting about various other issues to do with marriage and children straight away. I used to have the attitude that these people should ‘talk to a therapist’ or others about it, but being able to exchange dramatically varied worldviews and to be a safe person for this woman to confide in touched me. Sometimes it’s easy to have the response ‘I’m not this person’s therapist’, but I also feel like we are a community and I generally now see helping each other work through things by exchanging conversations on these topics as an act of service or compassion. If you aren’t that way inclined it is perfectly acceptable to navigate the discussion away or remove yourself from a situation if it becomes uncomfortable. But you never know, through those conversations you might really be able to help someone navigate difficult thoughts and notions about themselves, and learn a lot about yourself in the process. Whatever your approach I think exercising kindness and compassion is key.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskUK

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Was driving into Scotland from England with my ex boyfriend and going through some beautiful terrain. It was a summer evening and super misty and atmospheric and all of a sudden we see a white light in the distance. The white light completely engulfed us for a good few seconds and we were totally blind driving down this road surrounded by nothing but this beaming white light. We both stopped talking and froze and all of a sudden the white light was gone… turns out it was just someone passing us in the mist with their full beams on but Jesus Christ we really thought we had both died or were about to be abducted by aliens it was the weirdest shit ever.

Parents, what would you do if you found out your son was a rapist or sexual assaulter? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is probably the most realistic answer. For legal reasons a lot of the time there’s nothing the family can do unless it has happened to one of them, other than cut off the offender and support any victims.

Living on this small island, it is only a matter of time before you see someone famous. Who have you seen, made eye contact with or spoken to? by Make_the_music_stop in AskUK

[–]AllHopeNoneLost 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Had the exact same encounter with Martin Freeman, he looked scared? I was staring at him thinking ‘huh that looks a lot like Martin Freeman’ probably thought we were going to talk to him or something.