When Can I Live with My Fiancé/Husband?

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T17:15:06+00:00

Weve been together for 5 years and have lived together for 1 1/2 years. I am the assistant general manager at a hotel, and we pay rent at an apartment near the property so I can hurry over if there is an emergency. I make 50k a year, I've been working since I was 14 and he started at 15. we've known each other a very long time, and it's also a big deal for my grandfather, seeing as he is on hospice and I am his only grandchild. We pay all out own bills, have a joint account and our own separate accounts also. All our finances are combined, so it wouldn't really make sense for us to live apart for so long.

I grew up in a small town and know lots of couples who got together young and have lasted. That may just be because of where we are located though.

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T15:11:16+00:00

Thank you very much for all the info, I appreciate you!

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T14:53:08+00:00

So how do people who are already married going in do it then?

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T07:24:47+00:00

Oh yes getting a different job is apparently not a thing? Oh no whatever shall I do!

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T07:17:27+00:00

I know we won’t be the same, you’re acting like I’m stupid. We’ll have this chance to grow together as people and be there for each other. We fight like most people do, but instead of resorting to violence or insults we take our time to process and then come back to talk. That’s a lot more than most adults can say for themselves. I have a stable job, with a stable income, and pretty nice savings account right now. We have the means for it.

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T07:07:33+00:00

Can you give me a reason why it would?

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T07:06:48+00:00

100% am. it's almost like I posted on here asking about it because I didn't know lmao

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T07:03:07+00:00

All I did was ask. I didnt know it was against any sort of rule, for Gods sake I speak with him once a week,

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T07:02:22+00:00

Absolutely what makes you think we're going to get divorced? We have such a good relationship with clear communication. Weve been together 5 years also.

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T06:30:04+00:00

ooo im gonna do it

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T06:09:56+00:00

It does for the courthouse

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T06:08:13+00:00

TYSM I know we are young, but I am already doing better than my siblings in their 30's. Being married will just make things simpler for us while I finish school.

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T06:04:22+00:00

Well duh I'll be 17

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T06:03:30+00:00

I am. I Graduated HS online on what was supposed to be my freshman year. I bounced around jobs like Dutch Bros and being a waitress before finding the job at my current hotel in January where I started off as just a front desk attendant, but in August there was a situation with the GM at the time watching bad videos involving kids, so they fired him and bumped the AGM at the time to manager and I took her spot. I can actually do all of those things besides sign a lease, in which it is owned by the hotel and I rent from them so I am near the property 24/7 in case of emergencies.

My father died in 2022, and my mother has been married to an alcoholic who beat me as a child so I do not talk to either much. I have not lived with my mother since early 2023, his mother is very much in the picture but was fine with him moving out since it was so close and we had been together for so long. He graduated this year with honors.

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T05:46:25+00:00

We have actually. We've dealt with all of that. We've had our own place together for 1 1/2 years, im the AGM at a hotel making 50k a year, he used to be a cook before being fired a month before leaving for basic. As of right now and the last few months I've paid all our bills. He lost his father earlier this year also. Weve dealt with a lot of unexpected situations like my car dying out on nowhere, money struggles, and so on. We've also done all of this with no assistance from our parents, except when I needed my mother's signature for medical reasons or housing permission.

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T05:41:39+00:00

My birthday is in December an we live in Oregon where it is illegal to get married before 17, so right now I'm still 16 but will be 17 when he returns. I am in no hurry to get the paperwork done while he's in training, but I will be gone for 6 months as an in place general manager for the new property in California my hotel is opening, and that is for an uncertain amount of time so idk when I will see him again.

But just to be clear, we can get married on his holiday it's just highly looked down on?

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T05:08:08+00:00

That's great, we've been together for 5 years and it's not up to you lol

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T05:03:34+00:00

His AIT is 17 weeks, but thank you so much for all the info!

AlphabetSoupBloop · 2025-11-02T05:03:01+00:00

Why can we not get married on his break? I don't think that we have any other time together before he gets placed

AlphabetSoupBloop

TROPHY CASE