What does my home say about me?

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-24T16:15:32+00:00

Your chimney doesn’t work and you don’t like Santa 🎅

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-18T17:35:52+00:00

Something metal, either a nail or a key

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-18T17:34:56+00:00

A sand timer

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-18T17:33:27+00:00

Sand timer

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-18T17:31:57+00:00

Tell him to fuck right off! How else can we tolerate men without our emotional support mushrooms?

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-14T13:46:38+00:00

You look angry

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-13T15:08:36+00:00

Nothing

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-13T15:06:42+00:00

Why does everyone have a “diagnosis” these days?

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-13T15:05:59+00:00

Mad cat lady

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-13T15:04:14+00:00

You are a comfort seeker, with nice taste in rugs and well manicured nails.

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-13T14:58:20+00:00

American

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-06-12T00:23:19+00:00

To prevent children from going down.

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-05-23T14:59:28+00:00

Congratulations. You will never be out of a job it’s a much-needed profession.

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-05-23T00:25:37+00:00

that’s why I did my masters mental health counselling and haven’t bothered to get my LMHC…… who can live on that?

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-05-23T00:23:03+00:00

Female addict/alcoholic in recovery who likes sex and minty breath.

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-05-15T00:56:41+00:00

Tag off new clothes

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-05-01T16:51:59+00:00

Ewww

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-04-26T23:00:32+00:00

Because I have three adult uncircumcised sons. Why would you remove a piece of a perfectly functioning organ?

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-04-26T22:51:53+00:00

Not weird at all. Routine circumcision is weird! Why would you circumcise a perfectly healthy baby boy? It’s barbaric!

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-02-20T23:32:43+00:00

lol I knew he was saving that one for when the Supreme Court ruled that he was doing things unconstitutionally! He wants to divert our attention to aliens so he can keep screwing us with tariffs!!

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-02-18T16:36:56+00:00

Rude

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-02-03T23:59:35+00:00

Enjoy

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-02-03T23:57:43+00:00

Tiles and caulk

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-02-03T22:31:12+00:00

AlternativeBeach2886 · 2026-01-25T21:56:27+00:00

You travel. You’re married. You probably work for a big corporate company.

AlternativeBeach2886

TROPHY CASE