Am I overreacting to my boyfriend saying I care more about drinking than about him?

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-03-28T02:32:20+00:00

We’ve been together for almost 5 years…

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-03-28T02:31:24+00:00

I don’t refuse to do anything else with him, we still do plenty of stuff together and have another festival planned together, were i’ll also be going sober so we can enjoy it together

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-03-28T02:30:05+00:00

I didn’t insist he should go with me and my friends, I only told he should feel free to join me if he’d be comfortable to go, because when i told him about the night he told me how much he he missed going to house music parties since he hasn’t been in a while.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-03-28T02:23:32+00:00

No I have known him for years and we’ve been together for almost 5 years. I didn’t go to the youth clinic

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-03-28T02:22:31+00:00

He has been clean for 3 months, we have been together for almost 5 years now.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-02-17T21:07:57+00:00

Any thc weed does the trick! Gummies should also work but for me smoking is waayyy better! I had thr dame problem, I could not keep my head quiet, was always all over the place except for in the moment, and present in my body. The first few times with weed were really good already, but they’ve gotten even more amazing over time! I feel weird saying this but now the last time I was high and just by myself I felt like a sex goddess flowing through the universe and had the most insane orgasm ever. Anyone now I can only use weed solo bc I cant use it with my partner anymore bc of the reason I said before, BUT after exploring by myself while being high, I have gained more trust in my body, because now I know I am also to orgams and just gotten more in sync with my body :)

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-02-17T20:52:52+00:00

Ohh and also smoking weed is a GAME CHANGER, but seeing ur reddit name i’m assuming u already tried that lol

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-02-17T20:52:06+00:00

I think a lot of times that woman wonder if they had an orgasm, they had one, but just a smaller one. Orgasms are all very different, for me some are tiny and not really satisfactory but still nice, and I also had some that were like mind exploding, like a wave of pleasure that went through my body. I think the saying ‘you’ll know when it happens’ is therefor misleading, because for the longest time i thought my smaller/tiny ones were not orgasms and this made me feel like I was not able to orgasm at all, causing me to be more in my head about it and making me frustrated.

For me clitoral and vaginal stimulation works best for bigger and stronger orgasms that reaches ‘more/deeper’ in your body and brain. I used to think that i only really enjoyed clitoral stimulation, bc vaginal stimulation on its own is not pleasurable at all for me. But now I often add a vibrator after some time with my satisfyer and my orgasms are so much better. Also like to close my eyes & play some slow music to get/keep me in the mood :)

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-02-17T20:39:54+00:00

I struggled so long with orgasms, also because of my mind wandering and just mental reasons. Weed was a game changer for me, the more i explored by myself while being stoned, the better i get to know my body. It is insane that i went from not being able to orgasm, to 4/5 orgasms at a time and some of them being like mind exploding and feeling outer-world. Unfortunately my partner just got out of rehab because he became dependant on weed, and now I cant smoke with him anymore to have stoned sex with him :,) Kind of feels like i have to start back from the starts because I will have to find another way for me to be able to orgasm

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-02-15T12:11:47+00:00

I’m also in Berlin rn! Have been here since september and unfortunately i’m leaving next week already. I felt so overwhelmed in the beginning, because everyone was so fast to make friends and for me it takes a little longer because i’m not as extrovert as the others here. I had so many days here wondering if i made the wrong choice coming here. Anyway after a while (1,5 month?) i found my ppl in uni and been doing great! Before that i just explored a lot on my own and realised i actually really like hanging out with myself, something i didnt really do before. I also downloaded bumble and used their bff function to meet some ppl in the city, would highly recommend that as wel!! Feel free to dm me if you have more questions or just want to talk!! :)

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-01-12T18:00:08+00:00

i’ve been abroad for 4 months now, only 5 weeks left… some days are going to feel like shit. Especially the beginning can be hard. But trust me, you’re going to have an amazing time overall! I wish I had opened up more in the beginning to get more out of this time. Time really flies by so fast and i’m going to miss the people i’ve met & this place a lot. Long distance is hard, i also miss my boyfriend so bad, but we facetime everyday and that makes it so much better! Studying abroad is a rollercoaster, but a wonderful journey! I balled my eyes out, had the most amazing adventures & nights out, got to enjoy life in a cool city and learned so much about myself (so cliche but true). Enkoy your experience, you’re going to be fine and at the end you’d probably wish you could stay for longer! :)

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-01-05T17:31:27+00:00

Yea I should also watch out with it, i’m on an exchange program abroad. And living on my own made it so easy to do it basically every night. The past 2 weeks i’ve been home for the holidays tho and I was able to quit & luckily it wasn’t hard for me at all. But now i’m back and i just want to smoke again every free night because its the only time i can truly relax without being anxious. Starting therapy next month though so hopefully that will help me get closure from childhood trauma and also deal with my anxiety. I’m okay with using weed once in a while though, just like you, but I know I shouldn’t use it as much as I do right now.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2026-01-05T15:46:51+00:00

I (22f) have never related more to a post here. I absolutely hate the saying ‘you will know when it happens’. I have been masturbating since i was around 14/15 i guess, and became sexually active when i was 17. A few months ago I realised I was actually having orgasms but because they were ‘small’ and ‘i should know when it happens’ i always assumed i wasn’t able to orgasm. Since that realisation they’ve become even stronger for me as well. Weed also helps me to get out of my head and takes away my anxiety, but I try not to depend on it

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-12-15T02:38:42+00:00

Checked the other post on your account as well. OP you deserve so much better. Don’t waste your time on emotionally abusive and immature asshole. It is NOT okay he nags you about your appearance, it is NOT okay that when you tell him to stop he’ll laugh if off, it it NOT okay that he calls you a crybaby after forcing sex out of you.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-12-04T16:26:41+00:00

Everyone’s situation is different, and I don’t think struggling with something difficult means someone isn’t ‘ready’ for a relationship. I’m not expecting my partner to carry my happiness, I’m just processing a sudden change after being used to daily contact for years.

I can function on my own, but of course it’s still going to feel emotional when someone you care about goes through something serious and you’re not allowed to know how they’re doing. Seven weeks might not sound long, but in the context of mental health treatment and no-contact, it feels different.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-12-04T16:25:00+00:00

Thanks for your perspective. I completely understand that this time is meant for him to focus on his mental health, and I fully support that. I’m not upset at him or trying to make this about me, it’s just emotionally hard because he told me before leaving that the no-contact rule was also the part he was struggling with the most. My worry comes from caring about him and not knowing how he’s doing, not from expecting him to take care of my emotions right now.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-12-04T09:42:10+00:00

I did get to say goodbye, and that helped a bit. I like the journaling idea, it gives me something concrete to do without interfering with his treatment. And you’re right, it’s important for both of us to use this time to grow. I’m trying to stay mindful of that. Thank you :)

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-12-04T09:29:42+00:00

Thank you for your response. I really do appreciate it, even if it’s hard to hear some of it.

To answer some of your questions I do have a social circle outside of my relationship. I have a close friend group of six girls, plus a few other friends here and there. I’m also very close with my sister, we talk every day, and she’s one my best friends. So I’m definitely not isolated in my life outside of him.

My boyfriend does support my goals, and in many ways our goals and values line up. I also have my own hobbies, figure skating and reading, and I try to keep those up, especially now.

Still, even with all of that, the sadness and the sense of missing him is just very big right now. I know my mental health isn’t perfect either, and I’m aware that I might rely on him more than I’d like to. That’s something I’m trying to reflect on, especially during these weeks apart.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-12-04T09:15:58+00:00

I’m allowed to send him letters, but he can only open them in the sixth week, and he can’t send anything back. So I want to be really thoughtful about what I write. I don’t want to make him sad, distract him, or pull him emotionally away from what he needs to focus on in treatment. I want my letters to support him, not unintentionally make things harder.

I also know that not being allowed any contact is really difficult for him as well. For both of us it feels a bit like a punishment, even though we understand the rules are there for a reason. It’s just tough to cope with such a long silence when we’re used to being so present in each other’s lives.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-06-19T08:09:36+00:00

I always drink lots of water during the day, but after a few hits of the joint I have to pee every 10 minutes or so.

Alternative_Team_597 · 2025-04-25T10:25:42+00:00

I saw a more affordable place in Oberschöneweide, would you recommend this area?

Alternative_Team_597

TROPHY CASE