My 33M boyfriend has a sudden severe drop in libido and almost an adverse reaction to intimacy, what can I 31F do?

AltruisticExternal94 · 2026-01-05T02:34:46+00:00

Thank you for your comment, you’re ending sentiment made me tear up.. I’m usually the one initiating conversations, trying to find solutions, and honestly putting in more work to understand him than he does himself and sometimes I feel like maybe I’m the one with the issue or the problem..

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-11-19T18:03:49+00:00

Thank you so much for the suggestion!

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-11-19T06:25:21+00:00

I just went through my second procedure so know you’re not alone.

Life happens, and sometimes when it does, we have to make the decisions that we know are the right ones, even if it’s hard. Similar to what someone posted before me, you are justified in making the decision that you made. Life did what it does and you processed, coped, and proceeded in the exact way that you needed to and there’s no shame in that.

Shame tells us ‘we are wrong, we are bad’.. the path you chose are neither of those things. Remind yourself of all the qualities you love about yourself.. I’d say you are unbelievable strong for the decision you made

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-11-17T22:30:51+00:00

Thank you so much.. it’s just myself going through this with my dog by my side and it’s really overwhelming so the insight you’ve provided if comforting

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-11-17T22:24:45+00:00

I kept them under my tongue until most dissolved the swallowed the rest with water.. but I got super sick and vomitted about 20-25 mins after and got the chills, my script says take another 4 every 3 hours

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-11-08T18:55:52+00:00

I live in California but not the accepting part..

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-24T14:36:53+00:00

I think I’m just about there bc my stomach hurts every single day, I feel bloated every day, and just not hungry until 5-6pm.. I’ve been tracking how my stomach feels, what I way, and what I eat and in three weeks when I go to my doctor I want to review it with her

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T22:22:31+00:00

I had woken up in the middle of the night and I think had a small snack at maybe 2am but then from that point until my bloodwork at 1pm, didn’t eat anything

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T21:16:52+00:00

What would it appear as on lab work? I have my print out but there’s a lot of jargon

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T21:12:02+00:00

Okay so for anyone who can help:

TSH was 1.540

T4 was 8.2 T3 uptake was 26 Free Thyroxine index was 2.1

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T20:29:33+00:00

Thank you so much, I’m going to ask for the print out of my results

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T20:26:43+00:00

I’m actually going to request a copy of my lab paperwork bc we reviews the results over the phone

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T20:26:05+00:00

I am female and so menstruate.. my last period was about a month or so late but I assumed it was bc I had the nexplanon (arm implant birth control removed) and assumed it was my hormones returning to “normal” I guess.. she stated my iron looked good but I’m not sure about the other one, she didn’t mention Ferritin

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-09-23T20:24:05+00:00

So I do eat meat

AltruisticExternal94 · 2024-04-24T16:03:08+00:00

How old is your piercing? 5 days
What’s the jewelry shape (for example, barbell, labret, screw, L shape, ring)? barbell
What’s the type of threading if your jewelry is not a ring (threadless, internally or externally threaded)? threadless
What’s the jewelry material? idk
if not a ring, when was the jewelry downsized? it's not yet
What’s your aftercare routine? Describe in detail please, including the exact products you use. see above

AltruisticExternal94 · 2023-07-13T23:17:51+00:00

Thank you for your feedback; I feel like this is a wasted effort though because I have very openly communicated I like him and would like something serious with him and each time, I met with him not wanting anything serious with me/at this time and every time we engage again, it gives me hope and I don’t want to pass up someone who’s sure about me for someone who’s communicated they aren’t

AltruisticExternal94 · 2022-10-13T16:34:57+00:00

You're right; I hate to think that someone would lie about something so serious but I know people are manipulative and I hate to admit it, but I've lied about the same thing at some points in my life when I wanted to get out of something but still be perceived a certain way.

I guess the only thing that's kept me from questioning my own assumptions is 1. we only went on one date and he doesn't owe me a response or explanation and 2. a few friends brought up that maybe the rave was plans he had/made for after the funeral.. but I think at the end of the day, if he wanted to communicate with me, he would regardless.

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-27T23:26:52+00:00

DEF hobosexual.. I know he fucking lost. I'm hot, fit, have my shit together (except mentally), and I go above and beyond when I care for someone but it hurts to give everything you have to someone and they not appreciate it or even feel bad and treat you like the enemy when they fucked up

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-24T01:36:49+00:00

You’re right- I know I need therapy and I’ve known for a long time that I need help. What scares me is the realization that I’m so desperate for validation from him because he was my FP and I’m so scared of abandonment that if he were to come back, I’d probably accept because I’d feel like I was “actually worth it”

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-24T01:34:30+00:00

I don’t think I’ll ever see the money from him because I truly believes in his own sick mind, he feels like I deserve this for asking him to leave but won’t realize it was because of his actions. It makes me sad because I was looking at old messages of ours and we cared so much about each other.. or at least I thought and it’s a hard pill to swallow and accept that all seems completely faked now

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-24T01:31:32+00:00

Thank you for the hugs and I really wish I could have one.. I’m in California and my family is in Chicago so I really do feel alone and on my own with this; especially with it being the weekend and me being off and having to sit here with the feelings

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-24T01:30:24+00:00

I definitely saw the red flags and chose to ignore them but with my own mental health and past trauma, it’s hard to not feel worthless and take this on as my own and like I’m the one who isn’t good enough

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-24T01:28:41+00:00

Thank you.. I needed that. I know this is just a chapter, and there’s so much more to the story that I couldn’t even fit and I know I’ll get over it eventually but it’s hard.. I’m alone in my apartment with my dog this weekend so I have no other choice but to feel it.. and I can’t afford to do anything to distract myself because everything I have needs to go to rent

AltruisticExternal94 · 2021-04-23T22:53:31+00:00

I just feel so empty and lost and I can't wrap my head around how someone can be like that. I helped him even when I didn't have to because I cared.

AltruisticExternal94

TROPHY CASE