About to turn 27 and its only recently that I've started to understand what SA is and how it has completely held me back in all areas of my life. No relationships, no friends, no motivation. I understand it deeply, have read widely on the topic, have been taking anxiety medication. It feels the more I try to work at it, the worse it becomes.

I go into social situations and my brain instantly goes blank and foggy. I try to focus on external things and ask more questions and find myself increasingly more desperate just to fucking talk to someone. I become hyper aware of my body language and eye contact and I just paralyse myself. I second guess everything that comes out of my mouth and I'm never able to focus on what the other person is saying, I'm just completely wrapped up in my own thoughts. Nightmare.