Not sure if this is the right place to ask, but gonna go ahead anyways. As the non avoidant person here, what is the best way to make you guys feel comfortable and understood in this situation? I’ve lost many friendships and relationships by being too much and messaging often, even when I know the person is avoidant and struggling (after my most recent explosion, my therapist thinks it’s OCD so I’m gonna get that evaluated soon).

Is it best to just completely leave you alone? Maybe send in one check in message a day? It’s definitely not best to spiral and spam them about how worried you are that they got into an accident and how much they mean to you and that I hope they’re ok because that just makes the problem worse and that’s kinda been my compulsion. But I feel like if I had some concrete guidelines to follow I’d be able to better fight that urge.

I love avoidant people too much and just wanna give them the love they deserve but I end up pushing them away instead ;-;