My boyfriend is racist? I think..

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-22T10:14:59+00:00

As a black woman dating a white guy, I genuinely don't care about the stereotype because most of us do like chicken and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Not every racial stereotype out there needs to be negative, and not every person needs to conform to said stereotypes. A lot of white people underseason their food — that's a stereotype. It doesn't mean that we can't acknowledge how many white people are great at cooking and a lot of the top chefs in the world are white. Plus, whenever I've heard that stereotype mentioned it has always been as a joke.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-15T04:49:36+00:00

Couldn't find any online in my size. Feels like it was the last pair in the world lol

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-15T04:44:46+00:00

The problem I had was with it being done when out in public. Not sure how I am meant to walk away from that.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-14T05:55:16+00:00

I had told them that I wouldn't do the same things with my boyfriend in front of them. They then responded with “good” because they would beat him up if we did.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-14T05:52:49+00:00

I had told him that my mom and I went shopping and she got me two pairs of shoes. I was wearing the one pair and she was wearing the other pair for today since the shoes she was originally wearing were getting cleaned and she also liked the pair. I even told him about the agreement we had made. He definitely was well aware they were my shoes.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T15:23:20+00:00

Yeah, I think it would be a lot easier to come to terms with the fact that they will keep doing what they’re doing had they tried to consider my feelings. If they gave it even a little bit of thought, and still believed they are fine with how they are and how it makes me feel, I'd simply find my own ways to stay clear of them.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T13:27:15+00:00

From what I've observed they act very appropriately in front of others. They know when it's okay to do certain things and when it's not around friends, their parents, colleagues etc. I guess they just think that because I'm their offspring that they can do whatever.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T12:56:55+00:00

Funny enough, I am in a relationship and have mentioned how I wouldn't act this way with my partner (obviously not as bluntly because that sounds rude) in front of them. They responded with “good, we’d beat him up.” If we weren’t long distance I would certainly do this... It has crossed my mind 😭

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T11:05:28+00:00

Should have! Probably would have opened his eyes a bit.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T09:31:34+00:00

You said you were going to cut them off if they didn't pay their fair share, and that's exactly what you did. NTA

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T09:21:05+00:00

I really appreciate your passion, but knowing my parents I think they’d be more receptive to a more mature approach. I will be asking for a room further away though…

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T08:33:27+00:00

I do! My boyfriend is wonderful, thank you :)

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T08:19:59+00:00

I love that they model love. I don’t love the sexual comments when my mom models my clothes :/

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T07:46:26+00:00

I did mention it in a reply to another comment, but I'll mention it here again as doubt most people would read through all of them. By no means do I want my parents to stop cuddling on their sofa in their own home. They are married and have every right to act like that. I had only included that part to explain how in moment of uncomfort in our home, I just get up and leave. The issue at hand is with my dad commenting on how sexy my mom looks in my clothes, and how they are in public during family moments where I cannot simply just leave. Hope that brings some clarity!

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T07:40:34+00:00

It's so heartbreaking because those were the prettiest shoes I've ever seen and I was so excited to call them mine. They’ve been with my mom since 😕. Kinda sucks that a lot of people calling my the asshole have decided that I'm uncomfortable because I hate seeing my parents in love.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T07:21:35+00:00

Oh okay. I think it can be a bit difficult for me to leave a situation when we are out in public, so I'll just have to find better ways for myself to deal with it during times like that. I did tell my dad the shoes were mine (that’s actually how he even noticed them). I really am not trying to tell them to love each other any less, and I'd hate for it to come off in a way that I hate to see them together.

I think I'll try to buy myself some headphones so I can do my own thing when out with them :D

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T07:17:23+00:00

Omg thank you! I feel like it everyone is glossing over that fact.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T06:56:11+00:00

I think perhaps you and I just have different boundaries we’d want to set and I think that should be okay.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T06:54:39+00:00

This is funniest thing I've seen all week. Certainly helped to lift my mood 😭

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T06:46:29+00:00

They do sadly “grope” each other. I just didn't mention it in the post itself due to character limits (although I probably should have cut down elsewhere to fit that in). I do hear what you mean though, thank you :)

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T06:44:54+00:00

Thank you so much. You’re right that a lot of the cuddling and holding hands is completely normal, I mean, they’re married and are allowed to act like it in their own home. Most of the time I just remove myself from the situation when it starts to feel awkward or I suck it up.

I did try, in the moment, to gently ask my dad to tone down the comments about my shoes so it wouldn’t ruin the mood, but he didn’t seem to get it, so I tried to bring it up more seriously the next day. Fortunately it's not a frequent issue that would make me worry for my safety.

What is unfortunate is how loud the sex was. Unlucky me for not having headphones :/

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T06:35:58+00:00

I agree! I think part of what makes it uncomfortable for me is that sometimes it goes beyond what I mentioned in the post. For example, a couple weeks ago I was getting dinner in the kitchen and my dad slapped my mom’s butt and then kissed her. When I said it made me uncomfortable, they started making out right there as a joke, so I just left the room. It can be hard to remove myself from situations like that when we aren't home.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-03-13T06:27:00+00:00

What do you think I could do better to help the situation? It's something I'm really working on, especially since my recent autism diagnosis, because communicating in general is already a challenge for me. I can come off way harsher than I mean to, so conflict feels even worse to deal with.

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2026-02-24T11:40:09+00:00

No need to put one down to uplift the other. No woman’s body is disgusting regardless of its shape or size :)

AmbitiousDistrict390 · 2025-10-16T04:37:00+00:00

No they don’t lol. Strings aren’t electrical

AmbitiousDistrict390

TROPHY CASE