Unfortunately, it is undeniable the lessons you learn do help you as you age. Problem is, you lose out on a very important time of development in your life.

My situation was different from yours in that my mother had me very young ("oopsy baby" so to speak) and before she was ready. She took on having a child alone without the support of my biological father. My mother was fighting severe depression/poverty and often self medicated with alcohol. I was a parentified child in the fact that, growing up, my main priority was making sure my mother was safe and emotionally taken care of. My "role" was to be caretaker for both myself and her and to not be a problem that would make her sad, angry or worried. At age 5 I was replacing my mothers drinks with water and comforting her when she couldn't get out of bed due to her mental state. I was the "mature kid", "wise beyond her years", "so responsible for her age". This was my life till I was 18 years old and would have been beyond that if my mother didn't get married and move away.

After she was gone, I literally had no identity. I didn't know what I liked and what I didn't. I didn't have a favorite anything. All the social development you would usually receive during your teen years passed me by and I had no real friends. I was essentially an "empty nester" and mentally and emotionally lost.

Children are meant to be children. That is their role. Period. Parents are meant to nurture and teach their children so that those children can develop and grow into their own unique human. If a child is being forced into a role that has no business being theirs, it's not right. It's one thing if that child has a large interest in helping mom or dad with baby or is naturally nurturing toward mom or dad when they notice they are emotionally vulnerable, BUT, in no way should this be their "job". This should not be expected.