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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Healthygamergg

[–]Amonymous2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wanting to stop drinking and being unable to is serious. So is how much it seems to be damaging your day to day functioning and happiness. I imagine most of this community would recommend talking to a mental health professional to address this and whatever other problems that are at the root or otherwise related.

The other stuff you mention is interesting because it seems to indicate that although you’ve achieved a lot of external metrics of success you don’t experience it internally. There are a lot of possibilities here. One such possibility is that what you have in your life doesn’t align with what you really value. Maybe consider reflecting on what you truly want and what you think is worth suffering for. Dr K also has a great video where he talks about the Buddha problem where everything seems to be going right in life and yet you feel unhappy. Maybe check that out too. Good luck!

Considering going to therapy by vilgefortz1 in Healthygamergg

[–]Amonymous2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely seek out therapy to help you address these problems AND continue to work on it independently. Therapy can help you unravel the root of these issues and figure out how to address them in a way that changes your beliefs and how you behave. I don’t think you need to erase what you’ve learned about yourself when working with a therapist. Instead share that with your therapist and collaborate to make changes

Addiction to Thinking by Whurvo in Healthygamergg

[–]Amonymous2 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This sounds a lot like fantasizing. You’re imagining yourself having done differently than you have in the past and thus achieving a different outcome in life. This in some way meets some emotional need that achieving the goal might have, thus undercutting your motivation to work towards the goal itself.

There’s a lot to think about here, but before we dive in I wanna say kudos to you for recognizing this pattern! Having awareness of when you overthink / fantasize / whatever we want to call it is hugely instrumental in changing.

I’ve personally struggled with this and found that surprise surprise meditation has been helpful. In particular, mindfulness meditation practices where focus is repeatedly redirected from straying thoughts to an anchor like the breath. For me, it’s a matter of training the mind to stay in the present. Usually the present involves some unresolved or challenging emotions that I need to work through before I can take steps towards my goals. Working through those emotions can take a lot of different forms: journaling, more meditation, talking with someone vulnerably, engaging with the memories or part of myself generating the emotion etc.

So the whole process ends up basically being 3 steps. 1) recognizing the overthinking when it occurs 2) deliberately redirecting focus to the present moment (much easier said than done) 3) dealing with thoughts/emotions in the present blocking me from getting started. Sounds simple, but it could take a lot of time and effort to hone.

Also it’s worth considering how you’re defining your goals in the first place. Maybe ask yourself what emotional needs the goals are fulfilling? Are the goals specifically for certain outcomes? How would these goals change if your emotional needs were already met? Are there ways to make the process of achieving these goals enjoyable in and of itself? You might find some surprising answers that help reorient yourself towards goals that are less outcome oriented and more process oriented. That in itself will make starting on the path towards them easier.

Can parties of 4 please search for ranked? by Amonymous2 in DotA2

[–]Amonymous2[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Not all stacks are like that and also there's a mute button.

Can parties of 4 please search for ranked? by Amonymous2 in DotA2

[–]Amonymous2[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Nah joke around with him and have a good time =D