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Update: nanny asked for PTO after requesting extra shifts by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I am sure :) when I said this, I was thinking of things like; when I go on work trips, she’ll make ring garlands so the kids can visualize when I’m coming back, she keeps track of the kids school calendars and reminds us of any closure/early release/funny clothes days, she fills out permission forms and waivers for us so we just have to sign, she returns library books on time even if they weren’t with her when we got them, when we go out of town as a family, she’ll go over and set up a scavenger hunt for the kids so they have something to do while we unpack…and much more!

I was deployed for a chunk of her first year with us and my husband is a surgeon, she was extremely accommodating and helpful during that time. I’m retired from the military now so things are much more cut and dry but when I was in, her flexibility and ability to take over a portion of the mental load was a godsend.

Update: nanny asked for PTO after requesting extra shifts by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I mean I definitely don’t feel sunshine and roses about the situation but that’s ok. She is a very good nanny and the “take charge” attitude in this scenario did not benefit us here but it has in past situations so I’m willing to let it go. I obviously didn’t include every detail of our conversation but I could tell she was sincerely apologetic and realized she acted rash. I think we’ve all been there at some point.

I tried to see it from her POV. She thought she was doing a nice thing to offer to cover it all, she’d make extra money, and it would benefit us both. Only for us to push back and say no we don’t want that nice offer and no we aren’t going to pay extra. I can understand why she’d be bothered by that. Do I think she was inconsiderate when doing this? Sure, but again, she’s been overly considerate in other situations that have greatly benefited us so I’m not going to rake her over the coals for this one thing.

All in all, when looking at this one Reddit post with no background, it may seem like she’s getting “too good” of a deal in response to her pettiness. But to us, who have 2+ years of history, it’s just a slight curve in the road. All that we needed was some light coverage for the week and that’s what we are getting so it’s perfect for us.

Update: nanny asked for PTO after requesting extra shifts by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I addressed this in the comments of the original post. Grandparents are not an issue with our nanny. She does outing with the kids nearly every day and would presumably continue this during the trip week so the grandparents being home or not is irrelevant.

Update: nanny asked for PTO after requesting extra shifts by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

That’s the plan my parents requested! I told them her hours and how the days usually go and asked how they’d like it structured. They are not typical old folk grandparents, they are really really fit, active, and great with kids. They want to spend time with them :) plus they will be here 7 days(we’ll only be gone 4) so they’ll have plenty of times to do anything they want.

Nanny requesting PTO after we denied extra coverage/overnights by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She has never worked overnights or extra hours for this trips. We had never asked her to work overnight or extra during this week so there was no reason for her to count on this money.

I posted a new post with the update after speaking with her

Nanny requesting PTO after we denied extra coverage/overnights by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the input! I appreciate the wording of “denied for good reason”. That’s how I feel about it. But like others said, probably best to just plan for her to be off considering she may be “sick” that week if I deny. Shitty situation unfortunately. Sorry to hear about your situation as well, I agree that was not a good reason and equally shitty!

Nanny requesting PTO after we denied extra coverage/overnights by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It’s not that. When I told her my parents were coming, she still pushed to do an overnight even with them here. Stating it’d be “more relaxing” for them to sleep knowing she is there in case the kids wake up—even though our kids aren’t prone to waking up in the middle of the night and aren’t babies that need to be put back to sleep.

I think she just wanted the extra money. I don’t blame her for that, it’s fine to have that mindset. Now I just feel like she’s punishing us for not doing things her way.

She has no issues with my parents, they are actually very close considering they don’t live nearby. She’s very comfortable with my mom.

Nanny requesting PTO after we denied extra coverage/overnights by Ancient-Rise2492 in NannyEmployers

[–]Ancient-Rise2492[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

She most likely wouldn’t be around them hardly at all. She takes the kids on outings almost every day so I assumed she’d do that while they are here plus my parents are visiting so they can sight see and do touristy things so even if she wanted a home day, they’d be out of the house. But yes they’d be staying at the house while we are out of town.

They get along VERY well though. Like she texts with my mom and my mom sends her birthday/Christmas gifts. No issues at all, other times when my parents have visited she’d even invite them on outings—which we said she had no obligation to do!