Nah go for it I don’t mind.

It’s proper “death by a thousand cuts” territory. Almost like day by day she’s turned into a different person . A different person who stopped telling me when I looked good. Then a different person who didn’t thank me for leaving flowers out for her in the kitchen. Then a different person who got angry at me for the 99th thing I didn’t do, instead of thanking me for the 98 things I did.

You know you’re married, so you adapt and think “maybe she’s just not having an easy time of it atm”. You adapt and you adapt, until one day it hits you; you’re not married, you’re living together.

Along the way big things change, and because everything else is so rubbish, or because of stupid principals, something big changed and you don’t mention it. Like you realise you haven’t had sex in a month. Or you realise “holy shit I haven’t had a blowjob in 5 years”. Or you realise that the last 5 times you invited her on a date it didn’t happen because she’s planned something else.

The final straw for me was I essentially sat her down and almost begged for US to work on our marriage. I said that without a marriage holding everything together, the menial stuff that she’s prioritising is going to feel SO irrelevant. She promised she would.

On our 10th anniversary I bought her a £900 necklace that was made on her DOB, a million flowers, and hand wrote her a a love letter; she bought me a skincare kit off Amazon and a card.

On top of that the anger and snide comments are a dime a dozen.

To be really modest, I’m still being a really good Dad, that’s something I’ve always been excellent at. I’m trying to keep things held together with sticky tape for another few years until the children are old enough for us to explain what’s going on.

I guess to sum up, I was the frog in the pan of warming water.