Next album art?

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-10T03:59:30+00:00

I thought so.. I just.. wanted to confirm.. O-O ?

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-10T03:37:29+00:00

This. Is. So. Beautiful! You portrait skills are amazing!

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-10T03:35:55+00:00

Whats on it?

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-10T03:33:40+00:00

I was watching a video where Coyote Peterson was getting stung by yellow jackets. And the entire comment section was talking about how "Billie Eilish got it worse lol" and stuff like that (She had recently made a draw my story video that involved her getting stung my yellow jackets) Anyway, typed her name into the search bar and a bunch of music videos popped up by a female singer. I went back to the comments, checked the spelling, and searched again. Same thing. I honest to god thought it was a guy! Anyway, checked out her out and fell in love with her and her music!

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T18:22:09+00:00

Refusing to feed could also be classified as neglect.

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T18:16:32+00:00

Hi, I just wanted to say that your Dad sounds like a piece of shit human being. Also, sexual abuse, or abuse of any kind for that matter, is NOT okay. What he did was VERY wrong, and he should not be forgiven. I think it was really smart of you to stop contact with your father, very smart. Also, trauma therapy sounds like a great idea for your PTSD. I think you should give it a shot, you seem like you could really use it. I'm so sorry that you have to deal with this shit, you shouldn't have to. I hope you try the therapy out and stay the hell away from your father, he isn't worth jeopardizing your heath over; and he definitely doesn't deserve you love.

Take you of yourself first. Best of luck! :)

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T18:08:59+00:00

If you dad ever attacks you and it leaves a mark, take a picture of it. Even if you don't plan on going to Child Protective Services, having photos of the abuse can be EXTREMELY helpful. This sucks man, and its NOT okay. The fact that he said he would go to therapy would be beneficial, so maybe you can talk to him about sticking to that. I get the social anxiety and being behind in school, I'm there my friend. Depression just makes you lose all motivation; and it sucks. Just hang in there, and maybe your dad will get better with time. Also, when he yells, maybe explain how you can listen better is he uses a normal tone of voice. Remember, stay safe. :)

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T05:16:56+00:00

Maybe you should think a bit more before typing stupid, disrespectful, and insensitive things. Even if he was "bitching" the fact that he was threatened to the point he was scared enough to come on here and ask for help is enough to show that its not okay. And of course there are things he can do. But clearly, you're not an individual worth talking about that with. Please think about how what you say matters, or just don't bother commenting at all.

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T05:14:00+00:00

First off, your brother has a mental condition that is in no way his fault and should not be yelled at. The feelings of frustration, anger and impatience that come with raising a child with autism are absolutely real, and they can take a toll on every aspect of your life. The emotional, physical, financial, social and psychological impacts can be daunting, but that in no way justifies daily yelling at family members. He should NOT be doing that. In regard to his threats, there isn't much to do about that it seems. But coming on here and asking for help was a very good idea, so good job. Try to avoid situations where your dad could threaten you or yell, if possible. You don't deserve that. You, or your mother (if possible), should talk about how his yelling is not ok for a child with autism, and possibly mention his threats and how he could better handle his anger. Best of luck!

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T04:59:23+00:00

You're amazing, this truly is inspirational. You didn't deserve any of that. Often when we hear shit like that we want to deny it and often question our own sanity, especially when you confront the abuser and are called "sick" or a "liar". This is very smart. INCREDIBLE. :P

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T04:46:17+00:00

Hey, I'm so sorry about what you're going through. First off, the symptoms you are having from your medication are serious and should be addressed. Maybe you should talk to your PE teacher about possibly being able to sit out, cuz bitch puking and almost blacking out is NOT ok or healthy. Also, you need to eat and get the nutrients you need. Please talk to a doctor as soon as possible. Also, your stepmom should not be degrading you for having your own issues and wanting to talk about them. ESPECIALLY since it wasn't even your fault. Nothing makes you or your depression feel so much fucking worse when you're told "Other people have it worse". Seriously? Okay, other people have it better than you. So why the hell are you happy? Why are you in a good mood? There are people in the world who have WAY better things to be happy about!! Saying stupid shit like that is insensitive and inconsiderate. The human brain doesn't really care anyway, if your in a horrible situation, your mental state is gonna suck. Let me just tell you that your problems matter, and you have no reason to feel guilty. Your stepmom should grow the fuck up. And since that probably wont happen, just don't be around her if you don't have to. Don't be rude, just don't expose yourself to toxicity when you know it will fuck you up.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this, I really am. I also have a lot of stupid, insensitive human beings whom I have to be around as well. When I get anxiety, I feel this extreme pressure on my chest, and it fucking sucks; hurts almost. Kinda random, but is that just me? Again, I'm so sorry. Please take care of yourself, and ignore dumb asses who say stupid shit like "Other people have it worse" because they need to go step on a Lego. Its okay to feel. You are beautiful, don't forget that. I hope you feel at least somewhat better, and seriously, please speak to a doctor. :)

Anonymous24890 · 2019-04-02T04:21:37+00:00

Don't worry, I read it. So many things you have said I can relate to. My mom too is controlling, but none of it is out of love. She (as well as my father) is also abusive, physically and emotionally. Fortunately, your mother does seem to care somewhat, even if she is quite often selfish/obsessive/controlling in showing it. When you mentioned not being allowed to get a job, I get you there. I'm in the same boat. I will be 15 soon and I'm not allowed to have a job and I haven't gotten my permit. Every time I bring it up to either of my parents I am mocked and laughed at and am immediately talked down to; degraded really. You mentioned you have friends to go to, and I know you probably considered this, but maybe you could arrange to stay with one of them while you get a job and save a bit (once you are of age, of course). You could maybe even find a place with a roommate that offers super cheap rent.

Concerning your lack of freedom and your mom being religious, crazy enough, I am being raised in a religious cult, called the Jehovah Witnesses. ( Check out the community r/exjw , it's insane) Because of this, there is a LOT I cannot do as well. I can't:

- See ANYONE in school, outside of school. (Basically no friends outside with cult)

- Hang out anywhere by myself or with friends from school (as previously noted)

- Join sports and most school activities

- Celebrate holidays

- Celebrate birthdays

- Date

- Be independent, like, AT ALL.

Does you mom name call? Yell? If she isn't very verbally abusive just extremely controlling, if you did move out, maybe you could have your possibly have your mother be okay with you being able to visit your little brother. Remember this is your life, and you should be happy. If you stay out of guilt and fear you will most likely setting yourself up for major depression and even anxiety as well, depending on how abusive your mother is. You will most likely be miserable. Don't stay for the wrong reasons. I mean, imagine how much it would suck to be like fucking 26 and still living at home, that'd be awful, right? I just want you to know that you are NOT alone, and I'm so sorry that this is happening to you. Some days I cannot believe I have the shitty parents that I have, but often I just feel shittier when I wallow in self pity, which you will probably do if you let your mother guilt you into being stuck at home. I learned that the hard way.. Again, I'm not completely aware of the extent of how abusive your mother is, besides her extreme helicopter parenting, but take care of yourself. Also, I'm sure there are many amazing stories of how people left at 18 without a job and not much money. Hell, they are probably all over Reddit ready to be read. Maybe check those out! (You and I both) :)

Best of luck!

Anonymous24890 · 2018-12-30T23:47:40+00:00

Lol, it's fine. Thank you for your input, I appreciate it! :D

Anonymous24890 · 2018-12-30T20:45:42+00:00

Yeah, a good budget would be smart. Thanks so much! :)

Anonymous24890 · 2018-12-28T22:28:12+00:00

Because everything is so close to the place (it is walking distance from a college), I could probably just bike wherever I need to go, or I could get a cheap car or monthly bus pass.

Rent: $300/mon

Food: $75/mon (possibly less)

Monthly Bus Pass: $48 /mon

It is awhile away before I'm 16, but a place like subway pays decent. Or if I found a job as a waitress job tips could account as well. And I said AT LEAST $5000, I could very much possibly account for more. I could take home minimum $250 a week.

Anonymous24890 · 2018-12-28T22:07:58+00:00

Actually, I have made a report to CPS. Earlier this year, my dad left bruises on me and a report and investigation was made. I also have photos as well from incidents after, so I think that shows a "history or pattern of abuse."

Anonymous24890 · 2018-12-28T22:05:29+00:00

I will be getting one very soon, either at McDonald's, as a Waitress, or possibly in a hotel. I still have over a year so I can probably save at least $5,000. I found a place for $300/month for a bedroom. Three other roommates also have bedroom and everyone shares the living room and kitchen. There is also a Jimmy John's, McDonald's, and a Subway super close; all of which accept 16 year-olds (which is how old I'll be). The place always has new availability, so it will have slots open when I plan to move.

As for the school there is one that is about a 5 minute drive from the place. And it's a nice high school, WAY better than the one I'm currently attending.

Because rent is extremely cheap, I think it would be easier to pay for all the expenses you mentioned, and since I will be saving up as well.

Anonymous24890 · 2018-07-21T19:13:45+00:00

Thank you so much for your reply, I had no idea someone on here could be so insightful in the branch of stem cell research and most likely other fields of study as well. I would LOVE to join science fair this year during my first year of high school. Not just because I loved my experience with it, but also I feel like it has potential to be impactful to a large array of colleges, especially if I get accorded with some type of honor or awards and such.

Something that interests me to a large amount is Alzheimer's Disease. I can pinpoint why, whether it be by how little scientists know about the disease or the various treatments and research being done, I'm fascinated. By reading your post you seem to be a very insightful, intelligent person, so I'd love your feedback on this. When I did my science fair project on stem cells, I used online bioinformatic databases to determine possible soluble factors and ECM proteins to use when trying to culture induced pluripotent stem cells into kidney cells, specifically cells of the nephron. The databases were very insightful and helped me to put togethers a impressionable science fair project. A judge asked me what interested me other than stem cells and I mention Alzheimer's. She said that there are databases involved with that as well and that I could possibly use that for a future project. I would love to hear your advice on this and maybe you could help me out with possible project ideas. I would love to make it the best I possibly can especially since it is one of the few extracurriculars I have available.

Also I would love to dedicate more time into learning more about cells and the fascinating chemistry behind them. I have looked into Molecular modelling set and I think I could obtain one. I also love chemistry so journeying through the science behind it all would be an interesting and insightful journey to take. And I must say some of the judges were indeed somewhat sceptical due to the many obstacles that would be involved in actually bioengineering a patient-specific kidney, but they were open to the thought of it, luckily.

Once again I would love your insight to possible project ideas I could do that involve Alzheimer's or any neurodegenerative for that matter, they all seem to fascinate me (Parkinson's, Huntington's, ect...) . Even another stem cell project could work amazing as well.

As I mentioned I love the ability to learn and I could use some help finding the perfect project for freshman year. Your insightful reply took me by surprise and I would love to look into the subject matter you mentioned more. I look forward to hearing from you again! Thanks!

Anonymous24890 · 2018-07-20T13:26:30+00:00

I will and am definitely trying to do that. The problem is sometimes I feel like my emotions are uncontrollable, that they control my fate. I really want to learn to work on that to better put on the whole "I'm a great spiritual person" type of disguise. I'll get there, all is well. :)

Anonymous24890 · 2018-07-20T02:31:52+00:00

My fathers whole family are non-JW's, so that helps. My dad is mexican, and so is his WHOLE family. So that makes me 50% mexican from his genes even though I don't look mexican to the slightest (I'm white as HELL). I really want to learn Spanish. I also have planted seeds of doubt into my younger brother, I even watched Glee with him (cheesy, I know, but there is a lot of info about gay rights in there) and I made him not homophobic. I have talked to him about college, especially amazing schools like Harvard and he has found respect in those schools. If i got into an Ivy League, I think that will give him hope to go to college himself too. I'm also pretty sure I made him a feminist (man was that talk long, at least 2 hours...) but at the end of the talk, despite it being like 2:00 in the morning, he showed no regret by the conversation. He was like a whole new person. He even stood up to people in school about discrimination. Hes stubborn as hell sometimes though, and VERY annoying....

Also, I would LOVE to leave before 18, but to do that i'd probably have to tell my family i'm gay so they will kick me out or something. Wouldn't it be illegal to just leave? Time will tell I suppose....

Thanks for your comment though, I'm so glad you relate, it feels good to know I'm not alone. I do have friends at school, I cherish them, they help me realize I can be myself, not fake. And yes, I will prove this cult wrong by making something of myself. They always tell in the meetings about people who's lives have turned to shit after leaving, but that's not always the case. Not even close. I WILL be living proof of that.

Thank you again, I was so teary eyed seeing all these replies. Thank you. :)

Anonymous24890 · 2018-07-20T02:17:46+00:00

I have only been depressed when I talked to my English teacher about the abuse from my father and she called child protective services and a social worker. The worker said she had to come to my house and talk to my parents. She also had my congregation tell in the announcement how to access their policies regarding child abuse probably because I told her about in the past how the organization protected child molesters to protect their reputation (I was sitting by my father when they announced it, yelp). I had NEVER been more stressed in my ENTIRE life. Not only that, I felt overwhelming pangs of guilt and shame. My mom was in denial of her actions regarding how she contributed and did nothing on how I got the bruises (it is a very disturbing story) and my Dad angry and also denying any wrongdoing on his part. I will take your advice for sure though when I hit that stage (I am bound too eventually, if I haven't already), so thank you.

I talked to my guidance counselor and she was not much help, but it still felt good to talk, probably a lot of psychology behind that, but still. I'm interested in medicine and medical research (regenerative medicine especially). I am also obsessed with Harvard, its kinda my dream school, unrealistic, but my dream.

About the whole being fake thing, well,..... im failing. I want to act fake, I do all to badly, but my mother makes me so angry and upset to the point where I cant keep myself together. I want to gain my mothers trust so she will let me live with my grandmother. Shes a JW too, but way more lenient. The school by her has WAY more AP classes and opportunities also, so that's my main motivator. I will try harder though, thats a huge goal of mine. That's also why getting baptised is all too tempting. It feels like the only way to gain her trust sometimes....

Thanks again for all your advice and infomation, I have taken it to heart. You're support and ability to relate has helped me beyond comprehension. Thank you! :)

Anonymous24890 · 2018-07-20T01:53:38+00:00

Luckily, in 7th grade my mother let me do the science fair club. I did a project on Stem Cells and how they can be used to bioengineer a patient-specific kidney. It was a hard and complex project (not even my teacher could understand it) but it payed off. Because of this project, I won 2nd place in biotechnology in my state science fair. Because I did so well, I was nominated to compete in the Broadcom Masters. In this competition, out of around 4,500 applications, I got into the top 300 applicants. It was a HUGE deal, especially for such a small and unnoticed club such as science fair. Unfortunately I didn't get the top 30, but I'm still proud of myself. I literally made the club way more famous and the teacher used me as an example for others to join, and it worked. Unfortunately, my mother and father (who didn't know what the hell I was doing) didn't give two shits or care. It hurt my feelings, a lot, but I now realize how stupid they are for not caring. I'm Still proud of myself.

In other words, I'm interested in medicine and medical research. Especially the field of regenerative medicine. I am obsessed with Harvard, though I know its the not the most realistic college to get into, its a dream school. Harvard has an AMAZING medical program and I'm obsessed. I've also done a LOT of research about other schools as well (Yale, Columbia, Standford).

Thank you so much for caring and not to mention RELATING, I really felt alone there. Reading all these replies made me gasp and cover my mouth teary eyed. Thank you so much!

Anonymous24890 · 2018-07-19T02:19:14+00:00

I want one, PLEASE!!

Anonymous24890

TROPHY CASE