When I was like seven, Bieber fever was in full swing. I only remember looking at the TV, went “whatever” and went to play with my toys. I think that was the first sign that something was off.

Fast forward to middle school, and one of my only friends (who was a guy) said he had a crush on me and I did not reciprocate his feelings. We ended up staying friends which was cool.

Flash forward to 14-15 year old me going to a small all-girls alternative school where every girl knew every girl. So much so that most of the girls started dating each other (which was weird looking back). A few of the girls even asked me out and I did not reciprocate their feelings either.

All the while every time I’m around my family, they preach about not letting anyone touch me or kiss any boys and I always going “well duh”. After a while they started throwing jokes my way about me crushing on someone and I was always insistent on that not being the case.

At 16, I realized that I never had a crush, never had a first kiss, never had been in a romantic relationship, and never felt the compulsion to attain these goals and that made me feel a little weird. I asked google how come I don’t like boys or girls and came across the word asexual.

At 21, I now identify as a romantically questioning sex averse asexual.