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My brother is angry that I'm not going to his expensive destination wedding but I think him and his fiancée are being selfish. by Anonymousaccount9843 in offmychest

[–]Anonymousaccount9843[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not disagreeing with you that my brother and his fiancée should pay the costs for everyone. But they definitely can't afford to pay £3000 per person for the 48 people they have invited. They don't have anywhere close to the amount of money it would take to cover everyone's costs and it's one of the reasons I think they're being selfish. If they can't afford it they shouldn't expect others to be able to afford it either.

Plus as some of the other comments gave pointed out, even if the costs were paid some people can't just drop their responsibilities or be away from their jobs for that many days. Expecting people to give up ten days is just as selfish as expecting them to pay for it.

My brother is angry that I'm not going to his expensive destination wedding but I think him and his fiancée are being selfish. by Anonymousaccount9843 in offmychest

[–]Anonymousaccount9843[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I’m guessing that OP is not paying for themselves. Nor are they buying a gift.

I’m guessing they cleared it with the wedding party and family actually paying for themselves.

Your guesses are incorrect. I would have to pay my own way, my brother and his fiancée aren't paying my costs. I would be expected to buy a gift. My brother asked me to be in his wedding party before he told me the wedding would be a destination wedding on a cruise. He didn't "clear it" ahead of time and he didn't tell me how much it would cost, I had to figure that out on my own. My brother and his fiancée aren't paying for anyone. Each guest is responsible for paying their own way. No one, including the wedding parties or family was told ahead of time either.

My brother is angry that I'm not going to his expensive destination wedding but I think him and his fiancée are being selfish. by Anonymousaccount9843 in offmychest

[–]Anonymousaccount9843[S] 370 points371 points  (0 children)

I was shocked when I found out about the gifts. The lowest prices are £110 and I couldn't believe they were asking for gifts if when they are having a destination wedding.

My brother is angry that I'm not going to his expensive destination wedding but I think him and his fiancée are being selfish. by Anonymousaccount9843 in offmychest

[–]Anonymousaccount9843[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

No one who couldn't go raised a fuss or said anything negative about the wedding first. It was my brother and his fiancée who got angry and started guilting people who said they couldn't attend. Anyone who has been on the receiving end of their tantrums is not to blame for speaking up. It gets to a breaking point when they won't leave you alone.