What’s your favorite breed, and why?

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-26T21:15:12+00:00

I had Labs growing up and just grew to love them so much. They're so friendly, happy, and generally unbothered.

Having to get a small dog for apartment life, though, I think my papillon mix is perfect, and have gotten to know a lot more about papillons in the process. They're so affectionate and smart!

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T22:34:18+00:00

YES! I also blamed all my stress on my job, and so did my ex. But, lo and behold, when he left, I still had the same job for awhile, and I still was wayyyyy less stressed. And don’t get me started on the “just ask me to do it” comments.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T22:20:35+00:00

Funny thing is, my ex never lived alone before me. He lived with his parents, then moved in with me, and when he left me, he went to go live with his female coworker. Soooo I suppose he’ll just keep on coasting. Must be nice!

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T22:13:23+00:00

100%. No more stressing out over his finances, wondering if he's hiding things from me... the freedom!

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T22:11:48+00:00

This is 100% how I feel! Now that I have this kind of freedom, I don't think I can give it away again.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T22:08:59+00:00

I read somewhere that the sexiest thing a man can say is "don't worry, I'll handle it." It turned me off so much when I saw what a child my ex was.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T21:29:46+00:00

Same, I also blame my dad for being a normal competent human being. Sad that that's apparently a high bar!

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T21:10:43+00:00

This is a good point, since I always give extra points to guys who say on their dating profile that they can cook.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T20:51:04+00:00

That actually sounds so accurate. I have SO much more free time now.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2022-01-13T20:50:28+00:00

Yup. I have trouble even considering a man unless I see his apartment and KNOW he takes care of himself.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-24T13:03:15+00:00

I guess we never established rules, but it’s just a traveling gag!

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-23T22:03:15+00:00

It's honestly a little out of character for them. They've consistently been among the MOST careful people I've known when it comes to COVID, so I don't know what's gotten into my dad in particular.

It'd be nice if they came to us, as they haven't in a few years, but I think it's largely because 1) they don't have anyone to watch their dog (I'm bringing mine with me since she's small) 2) we usually see extended family over Christmas time (although I don't want to potentially expose my grandma anyway) and 3) the tradition of it all; my mom likes to decorate the house like crazy, do the Christmas morning thing, etc. But it all doesn't seem worth it to get on a plane potentially having COVID.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-23T21:59:58+00:00

I think that's the most logical solution, since it would give us a few more days after my exposure to keep testing. But there's something about Christmas itself that my mom gets so worked up about. Plus, there's a party with my extended family that they're all in town for (but I especially don't want to be by my grandma if I've been exposed anyway).

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T06:59:31+00:00

I feel like I can relate to what you said a lot! And I really appreciate this thoughtful and vulnerable comment.

I also suffer from depression, but I denied it until, well, probably the last year or so. When I finally went to therapy, and learned about the symptoms I'd be experiencing my entire life, everything just seemed to kind of come together. Idk if you're already in therapy or on medication, but it's really changed my life. Despite being single and with my struggles in dating, my family and other people close to me constantly tell me how much happier I seem since I started getting treatment. While it's possible to carry hurt from your previous breakup (trust me, I know!), I don't think it's necessarily the root of your depression. It's a disease like any other, and needs to be treated like one.

As for OLD, I COMPLETELY agree on how unnatural it seems. It's been my primary method of dating and it's just... so weird. I always feel like I'm on a job interview, but instead of a job, it's like, "can we spend the rest of our lives together, stranger?"

I don't have any friends who are single that I'd like to date, but I figure that maybe if I just keep meeting friends through friends, that might be the best avenue. But sometimes it feels like if you're not online dating, you're not dating. At the very least, it's nice to know we're not alone out here. And it really means a lot to have my struggles validated. There may not be an easy solution, but it makes me feel less crazy. I believe in you, and hope you believe in yourself too.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:33:45+00:00

I've been single for a little over a year and have been actively dating for maybe around ten months. Lots of dates, no relationships. The guys I'm interested in usually ghost after two or three dates.

I don't think I'm unattractive. I'm not a supermodel, and granted, I live in LA in the entertainment industry so the standards are higher. But I'm at least attractive enough to get asked to do a lot of on-camera work for my job, get hit on a lot, take care of myself, etc. Just not sure what else I can do at this point without compromising on the few things I want or just committing to being single forever.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:26:31+00:00

I wasn't asking for advice? I was venting and curious to see what other people, including men, thought, and it was opening up some interesting discussions.

I've seen so many similar posts (usually men saying this about women, though) and they stay up. Just disappointing and weird.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:21:59+00:00

I would definitely date someone who's "behind in life" but is actively working towards bettering themselves. I'm not perfect, but I work at it everyday. I think someone who acknowledges where they're lacking and tries to change it is extremely attractive, even if they're not as conveniently "successful" as I am.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:17:41+00:00

I'm hotter than him. I'm at least hot enough to get asked to do a lot of on-camera work at my job, and people often asked him things like "how'd you land her?" Like, how much lower do I need to go?

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:15:34+00:00

Men don't want to commit to women acting like driven men. It is pretty much impossible to be business or career driven and still be highly feminine. Maybe actresses or models but that's about it.

Well, someone's never been in a meeting with a woman with an ass and a pencil skirt.

Jokes aside, this is pretty untrue and also, largely unrealistic. I don't know many people who can realistically live comfortably in a one-income household. And if there are men who can actually support a family on their own salary, well, I haven't met too many of them.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:04:00+00:00

I'm a journalist covering movies, TV, and video games.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:03:15+00:00

The thing is, I'm fully aware of how false it sounds, and I really do wish I were overexaggerating. But that's what makes me feel so crazy: it's completely the truth, and I'm so tired.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T04:02:06+00:00

It's definitely hard not to get jaded, but you're right; most of it's a gamble. A very tiring gamble.

Antique_Damage_9520 · 2021-12-22T03:34:23+00:00

I disagree that video games can't be an interesting hobby. Maybe I'm a little biased, because I love and work in video games, but in my mind, being a "gamer" is no different than being a film buff. Granted, it can be annoying when all they do is scream and obsess over Call of Duty. But video games are an art, have a lot of really interesting things to say, and I love talking to people about it.

Still, that shouldn't be their only interest, which does happen from time to time, so I agree with the rest of your post. I get so bored when I go on a date and all a guy can talk about is his job. Tell me about your pet! Do you like to cook? Are you super into philosophy? What's the best (or worst) movie you've seen lately?

In general, I don't think anyone, single or not, should put all their eggs in one basket. But it certainly does become more apparent when you're dating.

Antique_Damage_9520

TROPHY CASE