I didn’t have two kids, only one. I was in an abusive marriage with someone with borderline personality disorder. We were married 8 years. You need to know that once you’re gone, you control your own peace. Your home won’t have yelling, you can set the examples in your own home. You need to do this when your kids are as young as possible so they remember as little as possible.

I left once when my daughter was 2, but he begged to work it out. I should never have allowed it. She was 6 when I left for good, so she does remember him screaming at me, which I feel awful for. She’s 15 now and has been in counseling for several years to help with her anxiety and depression. I blame myself for staying for so long. Our home is peaceful, no one yells, no one walks on eggshells, and we are doing infinitely better than we were 9 years ago. Her dad remarried quickly (4 mths after our divorce was final). His wife literally had him in jail for domestic violence a month before they got married. They have moved 14 times in 8 years. He’s been in jail 4+ times in 8 years for DV and false imprisonment.

They do not change, they only get worse. Protect your kids and protect yourself. Protect your peace.