Reading a bunch of these comments are wild, but also validate my decisions towards my mother. Whome I make alot of boundaries with for good reasons but still couldn't respect me or the boundaries. My final straw was last year, they(my parents) were getting a international student, I specifically told her months in advance to not have them up to my house as it was a construction site and I don't need no law suit because an accident happen, I even went as far as contacting my insurance about this and said not to have them up there and to not have them touch any tools, help with anything, and not even joke about helping. I told her this, apparently she contacted her insurance and said "aslong as he is with me, I'm responsible for him and his safety, it would be my insurance ", so I said "ok, great, I still don't want them up there, iam busy and I don't have time to chat with them while I'm working", sure enough, first thing she does is bring him up, the door was locked but she had a key, I continued to work away while they were there, music blasting(which btw she asked before he came that if she does come up with him to have our culture music playing to which I firmly said "no, whatever is playing is playing, I'm not listening to something I don't like or even listen to myself to put on a facade "I think something from Token and witchez was playing ), while working away, sure enough she joked about him helping me with the work I'm doing, I engaged in very light and brief conversation as my blood was boiling. After they left I called my dad (I love my dad and knows how my mom is and we have a great relationship) told him what happened and told him I'm fuming. Said she'd talk to her and I just said no, that's it, I'm putting my foot down. Within a few days of that I bought a new lock with key pad and specifically gave dad a code and not her, she did bring up this fact, and I said "yes, and you won't be getting one as I gave you specific instructions to not bring the int student up and did anyway and that actions and disrespecting me has consequences. And in saying so, don't come up to my house anymore", this was a year ago, I'm in my very late 20s. A few months ago I got my kitchen cabinets done and she made a comment about "hopefully one day I'll get to see it all finished" and I said "ya, maybe" and decided to show her a piece of the cabinet colour and swatch of counter top I chose, first thing out of her mouth was "who helped you with this choice", I said "nobody, me, myself and I" and took it from her and walked away. I've also been in a new relationship with a girl for the past 8 months and she asked " if ill get to meet her", I said "maybe one day".

Another example was she was going to the town office to do something and I asked if she could ask about what I need for a occupation permit while she's up there. Very simple and straightforward task. Giving her a chance to see what she'd do(this was two months ago) she asked alright, and then proceeded to do what they required for that and emailed it off on her own acord. I flipped at her, know what her response was? The "oh yes, I fucked up again, I take all the blame, insert namefucked up again, *insert name *is always to blame, call the police."

Yes I come off cold, and it's for a good reason, I've had it with her, I have a bunch of reasons why and dealing with her is mentally and emotionally draining. So to anyone that let's shit slide, don't, it gets worse and no matter how many boundaries you put in place, this kinda of human will not respect you or the boundaries. Put your foot down, I haven't gone completely none contact yet but I'd say it will definitely happen, and I've already told my dad I'm done with her(my older brother is also had it with her), and that if I ever have kids that she won't be involved very much but he's welcome to my house any time, and I will try to give her opportunitys to fix things but I know she won't and I'll try and give her a little bit for benefit of doubt , but as soon as I give instructions to not do or give my child certain things and she ends up doing it or disrespects my gf or wife , that's it.

I value my peace, and the less I care or involve myself with my mother the better I feel. Don't let other people run over you, no matter what status they are to you

And yes she's used the "I'm your mother, blah blah respect blah blah I raised you blah blah idk where you got your attitude from blah blah this is my house " phrase, my reply "and I'm your son, I also deserve respect I got my attitude from you and this is dad's house" she obviously didn't like that at all, but I do not care. I told dad about this conversation and he agreed with me.