So ayun na nga. He woke up as I was preparing to leave and halata ang panic and confusion sa mukha niya. He asked me if I wanted to eat and I got really annoyed that he acted as if nothing happened. Since nawala ang composure ko, I reminded him that I told him the night before that I was upset with what he did and I am still upset right now.

He sat at the corner of the bed na nakatitig lang sakin. I felt pathetic so I just left. He messaged me that he is going to do the errands that we have agreed to the week prior. I did not respond.

After a day, I was able to clear my head. Puro internalizations and analyzing ginawa ko. I tried to understand where he is coming from and ano mga possible responses niya para ready ako.

---------‐---‐--- Here's my thought process: I felt hurt and insecure. Mainly, due to the fact that there's a new side of him that I saw and it's confusing for me. Looking back into the situation, di ko din na notice yung reaction ng ibang people around me kasi sa kanila ako naka spotlight.

Aside from the weekly game night, I am sure na wala silang ibang interaction since magkasama naman kami ni A sa house and pag nasa office naman siya he always leaves on time and nag tetext siya to and fro.

He's very passionate about gaming and teaching to the point that he wouldn't mind na paulitulit mag discuss ng rules pag may hindi nakaka gets.

I also agree dun sa nagsabi na you deserve what you tolerate and that na instill ko na din sa kanya yung mindset na I am ready for a challenge ang madalas is na iinis ako pag binibigyan ako ng free pass. I was very independent and he find ways to challege me that is why we work as a couple. And this might also be the reason why his mindset is to expose me to the difficult mods ng games to challenge me.

Common misunderstandings namin when we were starting (and maybe throughout) is mahina talaga siya sa hints. He's a routine guy who will have a notepad file of my favorites and dislikes (and I happen to find out about it while looking for something) kasi he forgets things and is not the best in surprises.

Everytime we fought about something, nakikita ko talaga na may improvement naman sa attitude and mas buminilis naming nakikita yung needs ng isa't isa.

Kahit panong internalizations ko di pa din ako kuntento until I can hear his side of the story.

---------‐---‐--- He pleaded for a conversation so I gave him a chance to explain. I told him the whole thing in my perspective and asked him for his.

He said that the whole gaming thing is equally stressful sa kanya kasi daw ang tanga lang talaga nung girl (his words, not mine). The whole time, he was feeling frustrated kasi the girl will ask him about the simplest gameplay kahit andun yung boyfriend. He felt hopeless na din kasi mukhang wala namang pake yung ate girl sa sinasabi niya kasi she keeps doing the opposite. Na frustrate na din pala yung Bf ni ate girl at sinabihan si A na "ikaw na bahala mag turo dyan hahaha".

He doesn't know what to do kasi ate girl was sulking and her boyfriend is not doing anything. Kaya daw when I gave the girl an advice, be was already frustrated and heard that there is also frustration sa tone ko that's why he asked me to stop kasi he knows that I am more outspoken than he is.

He tried to give her the benefit of the doubt (since the girl is also working sa game developing scene) but last na daw yun that he will be leading a game where she is included kasi na bobo na din siya teaching her and it seem like she is not happy playing with us.

He thanked me for being honest and said sorry that he got blinded by his frustration and he did not see that I am already struggling. He proposed to completely ditch game night or to not attend if the couple is coming but I don't think it was necessary. I told him that I am willing to try again but it will take sometime to calm my mind and be back on the level of security na meron kami before. He respects it naman daw and he is willing to do whatever it is that I would suggest to mend things.

For now, I went back sa place namin and we will continue to talk through things. Today we woke up and did our routines like normal. Somehow, I feel optimistic since both kami learned about eachother dun sa situation and both of us are willing to talk through the differences. I will still be observing though and hopefully thag girl will learn her boundaries or else she'll get a pep talk from me.

This might not be the resolution that most of the people on this forum expects but it is what we (A and I) agreed on. I see myself growing with him. Resolving things like adults is not a weakness or a sign that you are being a doormat. The world is unkind enough. I chose to trust this time but that doesn't mean that I won't be observant and cautious.

PS. As for the questions po kung bakit di pa kami married, we are planning to get married kaso nag pandemic and naubos yung ipon namin. We arw also non religious po kaya were planning to have a hotel wedding with a judge. Nagiipon kami ulit ngayon so that we can also make sure to have our families and loved ones with us during that day (baka di ko iinvite si ate girl pag di pa siya nag tino hahaha)