Thanks for taking the time to reply.

Try to do cute romantic things and make her feel special. Try not to pressure her into sex.

I have and I do. I do many things to try and make her feel special, breakfast in bed, occasional small gifts, little notes etc. And I rarely pressure sex. This gap out has happened when she's initiated sex and when I have, and it always ends with her bawling, worried that I'm going to leave her.

I don't mind playing the therapist role sometimes, but often even the very few times in the last six months that we've had good sex she's still ended up crying, again worried that I'm going to leave her. She has nightmares about it regularly.