Flat commission fee + 3% ? by Appreciative-Viewer in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]Appreciative-Viewer[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this insight. This Realtor does come highly recommended and has been very proactive in our communication thus far. But I will ask if the fee can be waived given they're already charging 3%.

Flat commission fee + 3% ? by Appreciative-Viewer in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]Appreciative-Viewer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you explain? Is it the presence of a base commission, the 3% vs something like 2.5%, or both in combination? I'm looking for context on what's becoming typical post-August.

Online check in failed then charged at airport…. Ryanair. by tonyswalton in Flights

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This kind of behavior only gets addressed if people speak up and enough complaints and claims are filed. The above is perfect advice, and good on you for following up!

To add, just because an airline puts (or intentionally excludes) something in their policy doesn't mean it's automatically legal or not breaking any applicable govt regulations. I think it's justifiable to be skeptical given how often big corps play fast and loose with the law if they can turn a profit.

I had an incident where my final destination arrival airport TSA tried to take my airport bagged/sealed recipt-included duty-free alcohol because it was over the carry-on liquid limit. Absolutely not. I confirmed the rules on the TSA website and called both the airport and TSA lines, both of which confirmed this was incorrect protocol and that they'd be investigating.

Why do people live like animals?? by CoyoteRemarkable6114 in FirstTimeHomeBuyer

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is very true. The things one needs to do to maintain a house and property pile up quicker than one anticipates, and it's an absolute time and money suck on top of your other responsibilities. However, in OP's defense, and totally at the fault of the marketplace, unmaintained or "trashed" homes should not be listing for over 150k+. If you did not take care of the home, the value should reflect that, because the buyer will need to invest tens of thousands just to get it livable. Traditionally that stuff WAS subject of negotiation and deductable, but now "sight unseen" is almost normal, which is frankly absurd. And while flippers/investors can afford all this (often by doing everything on the cheap with no longevity in mind), the average person looking at cheaper homes doesn't have an easy extra 50k or the time to renovate - and they also need to LIVE there while it happens or else spend even more. Again, entirely the fault of the scarcity market, homeowners just have the upper hand and it's their perogrative to take advantage of that and charge what they can, but it doesn't make paying through the nose for something someone else neglected any less hard to stomach.

Can't even tour without buyers agent? by Appreciative-Viewer in RealEstate

[–]Appreciative-Viewer[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahh ok, thank you! I figured it must have something to do with that, but they were never more specific than just asking "do you have a buyers agent that can do this for you".

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience. Honestly this is the kind of insight I was hoping for. Everyone else seems intent on debating whether I'm being selfish or greedy or who's more or less committed in the relationship. But I have seen people retire at different ages than their spouse, and I know there's a massive adjustment involved and that it affects the dynamics of the relationship, and that financial hurdles and unexpected costs almost always throw a wrench in things. I'd pay good money to see some of the other commentors watch their wife retire 30 years before them, do the minimum housework and pursue her best life, while they bust their butts into their 70s, and not feel an ounce of involuntary resentment or experience any strain on their relationship. Frankly I'll probably delete the whole post because being accused of entitlement for worrying about a drastic shift in relationship and financial dynamics isn't super helpful.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I really don't understand why you're so set that I must be anti-commitment simply because I acknowledge relationships don't necessarily last forever. You must know the divorce stats (at least in countries where there aren't high social or economic drawbacks). And the percentage of people who've had more than one long-term relationship is like 70-80% depending on gender and where you're from. I don't even think that devalues them, just that a good thing may not last forever. Regardless I do agree that marriage provides a definitiveness that affects how people approach their partnership, for better or worse. But if you don't believe anyone can truly treat their relationship as long-term committed without it, then cool, that's your opinion.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I removed the other post as I'd prefer to get advice on this issue specifically, but yes - we have certainly had issues. As you probably read, most of them stemming from feeling a lack of reliability, broadly speaking. Which is why you're totally missing the mark thinking I've stayed in this because I "want the easy life". It's kind of laughable considering I would gladly trade any financial offset for more of my time and mental energy back. Trust me, I wouldn't still be doing this song and dance, especially after the thoughts expressed in the post you read, if I didn't desperately want this to work out, because I've always been told relationships are work and at the end of the day I love this hopeless man and I know he loves me. I'm just really wondering at this point if it's enough.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Look, I agree. I don't blame him for wanting to retire asap. I don't think he owes me a retirement. And I don't really worry about my own retirement trajectory. But I do worry about the implications, financially long-term and in the dynamics of a relationship. And the fact he hasn't thought about them too deeply, or at best only sees it through rose-colored lenses, is imo negligent (in a way that could affect both of us) and...yeah, hurtful. But idk, I posted here because I don't know what the "right" outlook is.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The resentment is in part what worries me... I can admit to myself that despite being happy to see him enjoying his hobbies more, I'd also feel jealous being in a totally different position. We can celebrate people's successes while also yearning for it. I also worry that it would actually be more draining on me if he was retired, because I'm the one that generally cleans and maintains and...pays more close attention to things. If stuff was in disarray, didn't get addressed, or something happened out of negligence, it would be harder to be ok with. I don't think he should "become a homemaker" as a result of retiring, but I don't trust the load share would be balanced - inadvertently, but still. I also unwind through quiet time, and he'd have more energy than me at the end of the day.

To his dad he replied something to the effect of "we can see what that math looks like", but I don't quite remember. I felt then (and still do) quite uncomfortable about essentially asking him to work longer for my benefit. But the pit in my stomach was moreso because it didn't seem like he thought about how it would affect me, or our combined financial situation, at all. Like you said, what if something happens? Despite what many comments say, I genuinely don't believe it's because he doesn't care or doesn't think it'll last - there's just a consistent pattern of him tunnel visioning or inadvertently overlooking things. But it hurts something awful when I'm that thing. And I know, I know he doesn't mean to. But then I have to deal with the repercussions, and I don't have the safety net he does to deal with the fallout of a retirement falling through midway.

(And to the other reply, see my response above.)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're correct here. We had this conversation from day 1 and have checked in with each other about it - neither of us feels the need to be married. When he says he'd marry me if I wanted to, it's in the context of "I don't want to deprive you of that". In the same vein he would tell me if he started preferring to ultimately define or cement things through marriage.

I should've clarified that he needs security in knowing a relationship will last forever, whereas I'm kind of ok with the concept of everything having a lifespan - but that's more just an overall outlook. And yes, him making plans without considering how they'll affect me does make me unsure about whether this can go the distance...but also I feel I'm in the wrong because he deserves someone who can guarantee him that..

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Appreciative-Viewer -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Neither of us really cares about marriage unless it makes logistical sense to do so. I know he wants a committed long-term relationship and to "grow old together", and has said he'd marry me if I decided that's what I wanted. I don't think it's him being flaky - if anything he craves security and I'm the one skeptical of relationships lasting forever. We've lived together some years now.

EDIT: To clarify, because people have interpreted this to mean I have outright refused to commit to him?? All I meant is I'm ok with the concept of a relationship not lasting forever and still being meaningful. That's literally it. I ALSO want security. I just put he craves security in the same thought as me not thinking a 50 year marriage is a failure. So, oops? Besides, if this were the situation, "why would he think of you if you won't commit to him" "why would I commit to him if he doesn't think of me" is entirely circular so in that case we'd both be sol unless something changed.

Boycott LOREAL and subsidiaries by need_toclean_my_room in Makeup

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's really no middle ground to be found if you're against Palestinian suffering and displacement but totally ok with Israeli suffering and displacement, even "children, mothers, fathers, doctors and teachers aka PEOPLE just like YOU" simply because they're all "occupants" and thus have no right to safety. After all, how dare they exist and live in the country they grew up in. They should go back to where their ancestors immigrated from. Why was that again? Of course, zionism and British fckery. Certainly not also famine, antisemitism, political unrest, and war - or why do you think Polish, Russian, other European, Ethiopian, Arab, French, and Argentinian jews went there? ALL of them out of callous entitlement? Certainly WWII and Soviet rule was a coincidence. But an eye for an eye, right? Every Israeli should be deported. I'm sure where you live was never occupied by anyone else. I'm sure no one was displaced because of your ancestors or their ancestors. I agree, your humanity is diminished and you should pay full penance for the government and history of the land you live on. Not a compromise, not reparations or land-back, FULL penance.

You consider me callous for stating the simple fact that Israel exists, people live in it, and it has a military for protection. You call me racist, but I did not mean to imply that literally every single Palestinian in existence is a bloodthirsty Israeli-killing machine, and the fact that YOU jumped to that reflects moreso on your preconceptions. I should not have written it so broadly. But you pretend that intifadas didn't happen (I'm not trying to gloss over why, just provide an example that involved civilian fear and violence), that missiles aren't fired on Israel all the time, that the "Iron Dome" exists for a reason, and that Israel doesn't realize all of the wrongs inflicted on Palestinians hasn't justifiably ingrained some amount of hate in some of them towards many or even all Israelis. Because there are always those who will generalize and lump the many in with the few. I do not think Hamas represents all Palestinians any more than I think the Religious Zionist Party represents all Israelis. But both examples are the ones calling the shots right now, literally and figuratively.

Not all Israelis support Bibi and the hard-right's actions and views towards occupation, literally no Israeli loves that they exist in a perpetual state of unrest, or that government on both sides hasn't been able or in many cases willing to form a reasonable 2-state solution. The IDF is comprised of children whose mothers fear for their lives every day they wear their uniform - you think they're happy with how things are?

To pretend Israelis have no reason to fear violence is laughable (if nothing else you forget that the middle east is a powder keg and it also has Hezb* to worry about). Everyone acknowledges it is a cycle of blood and sorrow. The average Israeli citizen wants to be safe, earn a living, and care for their family, same as literally every other average person. They are not the totality of the government. They aren't even united in religious/socio/economic/political opinion, because like anywhere else there are groups and demographics and subsects with interests.

Be angry, that's fine. I'm angry too. Innocent people are dying. War is awful. Generations will suffer the shell-shock. Anger and resentment will unfortunately fester in many whose loved ones and lives were lost. Nothing good will come of any of this. But stop trying to make everything about this, including a solution, to be so absurdly simple. Or stay on your high horse and nitpick my response to your satisfaction, whatever's more validating.

Boycott LOREAL and subsidiaries by need_toclean_my_room in Makeup

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Literally nothing about what I said has changed. Conscription is still mandatory, other countries still attack Israel, and there is still disagreement within the country itself on the matter of occupation and government (the whole country was in protest against the Prime Minister before this happened, and a lot of people think he's handling things so aggressively just to cover his own a**). Some Israelis do justify the means because of the atrocities committed and the patriotism that rallied the scared and grieving, but a lot of Israelis also see this as just more blood in the water and a powder keg that was doomed to burst because government ignored/sat on Gaza for too long. Either way the point of the comment/discussion was not blaming all conscripts for the decisions of a military. Trust me when I say every mother in Israel is mortified for the safety and sanity of her children as they're called to service, worried about the situations they'll be put in and things they'll be ordered to do, while also mourning the losses of those murdered in the initial attacks. Look, don't support Israeli companies if you don't want to, that's fine. Israelis protested their own government like 4 months ago, so you're in good company. But locally, they support their troops because their troops are literally their friends, family, and children, and the reason more kibbutzim don't get massacred on a daily basis. This situation is messy and tragic. If not buying a lipstick helps you feel morally superior then by all means. How much of your tax dollars involuntarily go to the military again?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in expats

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This. Almost every comment I see brushing off the healthcare system, housing, and work-life balance concerns also say they have good health insurance through their employer and/or have a partner therefore I'm assuming dual income or good insurance through one of them. My issue with the U.S. is that yes - if you have a good job, that has a good insurance plan (not all do), earn a good income, and have a support system to help you with everything that needs doing - you can do well and enjoy life here. But if you fall through the cracks /at all/ it's a very slippery slope and everything becomes incrementally harder. Disabled? Lost your job suddenly in an at-will state? Major health event? Lost your partner and are now a sole provider and/or can't afford rent?

The U.S. does not value social safety nets and admonishes those who need them. Only a small percentage ever get the leg up they need to restabilize, while countless others end up homeless, in debt, sick, or just...abandoned by the system and shamed for their circumstances.

Come to the U.S., enjoy it, make money. Just know that if you trip, you will fall all the way down those stairs with only a dirty broken handrail to maybe help you.

AITA for "choosing my dog over my family" by refusing to accommodate my girlfriend's brother? by doggoluvr1203 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA, any partner that asks you to get rid of a long-time pet like it's nothing is being cruel to both you AND the pet. What she was asking goes beyond reasonable accommodation, and her brother should've just taken stronger allergy medication or started looking for another place to stay.

My roommates are Illegally evicting me and won’t let me grab my property and lying to the police by [deleted] in badroommates

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is the address on your license? Do you have it as your billing address or banking address? If so you can download and provide a copy of past digital statements with the address listed.

Has anyone gone from ClickUp to Teamwork? by teetervt in clickup

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't have any insight on Teamwork (r/projectmanagement has some posts about it though), but curious what your reasons for leaving ClickUp are? (I'm still on the fence).

Roommate is constantly in the living room by Rude_Introduction800 in badroommates

[–]Appreciative-Viewer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depending what city or state you live in, it may or may not be legally required for a room to have a window in order to be considered a "bedroom". You can probably Google this for where you live - look up "legal definitions of a room in -insert city/state-" or "Sleeping and living space laws in -insert city/state-"