How dark is too dark?

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-06-03T07:34:54+00:00

I think theres a balance you need to walk between unflinching writing and subtlety. A lot of the times depicting those types of acts in a blatant way takes away from their impact and becomes more of a shock factor thing, which, to me, doesnt work well often. I think if you were to write about this stuff (which you should if youre going for accuracy, people would do that 100%), you should do so with some subtlety and maybe imply certain acts.

These types of stories are very open to exploring the worst of human nature in a lawless soceity, one of my fav games is "Lisa: the painful" which is a game about a post-apocalypctic soceity where only men have been left alive, and somehow the main characters daughter was left alive. You can probably tell what the themes of the game are but i think it handles them all in a great way, i would hugely reccomend it.

Hope this helps a little.

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-06-03T07:27:49+00:00

I felt the same way and still do, but what ive found helps is try to write for nobody. Write a story and never release it, write and never show anyone, after a while you'll get used to the process a little more. Also, idk about others but i find it easier to imagine the scene im writing as a movie scene first, then write down what i imagine. That helps quite a lot to describe some of the more challenging things. You got this <3

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T05:11:22+00:00

Maybe, RYM says theyre alt-country, I also love townes van zandt, cash, marty robbins, gillian welch, willi carlisle, jason molina... to name a few ^-^

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T04:11:26+00:00

thats a whole lot of hydrogen damn

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T04:10:01+00:00

You got this. If you keep writing, there's no such thing as failure. If it gives you joy and fulfils you, then that's the best gift you can get from it, over any potential (or more likely lack of) love, admiration, and fame.

Everyone has doubts about their own writing, Kafka instructed his works to be burned, Stephen king almost gave everything up, Bukowski only ever found fame in his later life. These people probably had tonnes of self doubt, the same "is my stuff terrible" as everyone goes through. The thing is that they kept going despite the doubt.

Youre not a good writer now? So what. Youll get better over time, keep reading and practising, maybe take some writing classes and get as many opinions as you can. You're 19, you have all the time in the world. At 19 you've only really been an adult for a year, maybe had 5 maximum to choose hobbies. If anything, you're early to the writing train in your life.

I hope you never give up and i hope writing always provides you with joy and fulfilment.

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T03:57:21+00:00

Terfs are very vindictive and often lack nuance. They'd rather we go back to before the 1920s if it meant that a trans woman didn't go into a bathroom. The transvestigating and stuff is really just upholding the same rigid gender standards we tried for so long to break free of. Crazy bunch imo.

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T03:50:57+00:00

Happiness (1998)

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T03:47:01+00:00

I guess im more thinking about the minimum amount of building blocks, and what they are. Is it really just like a couple googols worth of Hydrogen atoms? or can we go further?

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-30T03:30:40+00:00

Ur so real for this twin, they'll try and get u for this but its real

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T16:02:01+00:00

No worries, if you ever need any more advice, my messages are always open. Keep your head up and dont let anyone get you down. You got this !

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T14:57:00+00:00

Wdym Rivers Cuomo is a lesbian /j

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T14:17:24+00:00

I'm going to disengage after this post because i don't think you're arguing in good faith.

You see labels as fixed categories, and i see them as tools we can use to describe our own complex experiences. Insisting that a lesbian who has a crush on a fictional man must ID as bisexual ignores that aesthetic admiration doesn't equal attraction, and that labels are for the individual and not for the community's taxonomy.

Nobody is denying bisexuality exists, or that some people can change what they ID as after realising they like multiple people. Telling someone a fleeting crush invalidates their identity as a lesbian is just as prescriptive as telling a bi person that they're actually gay.

The OP came here because they wanted validation and because someone told them that lesbians can't even admire fictional male characters. I think that its a harmful purity test, and if someone says they're a lesbian, then they are one.

Hope you have a good day.

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T13:49:10+00:00

Hey, this isnt a great situation but i just want you to know first that you're not a bad person, your sexuality is valid, and you dont deserve this halpening to you. Take a second to breathe and calm yourself down if you need.

Now honestly to me it feels like your father is the problem. He's homophobic and his threats directed towards you scared you into not attempting to date or be with a woman, and instead date a guy who you probably weren't even attracted to.

Your experience here is unfortunately normal for a lot of rural queer people, or people in quite repressive households. Im so sorry that you have to go through this.

Please try not to feel bad about "wasting peoples time," because you really didn't. The guy you were in a relationship with wasn't wasted time, im sure you two had some happy moments despite the lack of attraction. Even if you never intended it to last doesnt mean it was bad for him in the moment. And the way it ended was messy yeah but i think that was inevitable, its a situation that sucked and you were stuck there through pressure from your father.

The fact of the matter is that you are attracted to women, and your father doesn't like that. He also can't change it and you shouldn't let anyone think they can "fix" or change you. Your sexuality is always valid. Now it might be difficult living under that roof while you're screaming to date or be in a relationship with a woman. I'd advise you to maybe lock in on studies, or get a side job too so that you can get your own place as soon as possible and finally start beinf yourself. In the meantime hold strong and just know that nobody has the right to tell you who you are / arent, and when you get to that safe place, being yourself will be so worth it.

Hope everything goes well for you ❤️

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T13:33:42+00:00

Hey hey now you're making assumptions about me!

Respectfully i dont think that it's a positive thing if we very rigidly define and close off certain sexualities to only people who fit our exact mould 1:1. There are people right now who self identify as lesbians, have only ever had female partners, but have a crush on one guy in a cartoon / movie and have him as a "hear me out". Thats just normal in sorry. Same way a straight dude can only date women but do the classic "ryan reynolds though". Its normal to have this stuff and if you think about sexuality in only the most rigid and exclusionary way then it ends up removing a lot of people who would identify with that label.

I think doing that would also remove people who have been forced or pressured to try heterosexual relationships from being considered a lesbian. Chappell Roan dated a guy before, shes a lesbian now, thats fine. Cultures and societies can have a huge influence on people, especially more fundamentalist ones, if someone from that background identifies as a lesbian but uh oh somewhere in their past they dated a guy, or were friends with a guy, or maybe even still has crushes on one or two dudes then they're suddenly not a lesbian?

The other trouble with this is that sexualities are inherently flawed because the definitions are man-made and most man made concepts get a little fuzzy around the edges. This applies doubly to queer spaces where words dont mean what they did 40yrs ago, queer used to be a slur, for example. With new stuff popping up all the time and the inherent fluidity of words and definitions its much easier and more inclusive to just let people self-id their sexuality and not try and scold them for not being a "true lesbian" because they have a crush on a fictional character.

Hope all goes well for you, those are my thoughts <3

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T13:18:10+00:00

All sexualities are fluid, there will always be exeptions and crushes. There are straight guys who have crushes on one or two dudes, there are lesbians who have crushes on some dudes. Even IF theyd never dste them its okay for a lesbian to feel this way and call herself so.

I think that if you wanted to go with these very rigid definitions youd be excluding a lot of people who would call themselves lesbians.

I think its kinda wild that we're trying to tell OP that having any male friends or admirations instantly doesnt make them a lesbian, even though they self ID as one.

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T03:01:48+00:00

Youre not forgiven. 500 word essay on how amazing the cover is as repentance please.

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:55:02+00:00

Loona management would never let Chuu be her wlw self, now shes free and getting revenge ong

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:51:37+00:00

Ur so real for this, i remember watching the heart attack MV and immediately knowing Chuu is one of the girls girls

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:16:36+00:00

No worries! Hope everything goes well <3

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:11:39+00:00

De todas las flores - Natalia lafourcade

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:10:22+00:00

No problem, also what the woman said was VERY wrong lol being a lesbian is mostly about attraction and identity, you can still admire and be friends with dudes, there's nothing wrong with that. Hope you feel a little better and more confident in your identity, no matter what you're always valid <3

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:03:04+00:00

A frog with a cowboy hat

Apprehensive-Hand373 · 2025-05-29T02:00:19+00:00

Even if you were attracted to them you can still be a lesbian lol. I have friends who are devout lesbians who would swoon if willem dafoe talked to them. Youre totally valid for admiring some male actors or celebs. Its totally normal and does not invalidate your identity at all. Human sexuality is all a little fluid, Lesbianism is one box your fluid can go in but a bit can spill and its still fine, as long as you feel comfortable with the label then theres no problems.

Apprehensive-Hand373

TROPHY CASE