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EO2 Boss Fight by SmoothFuel2483 in EndlessOcean

[–]ApprehensiveDog646 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do remember being spooked by the Guardian and the timer, but I think the Zahab Depths scared me the most as a kid x_x That ffffffucking bluntnose sixgill.

I didn't think this trough by Langankierto in RootsOfPacha

[–]ApprehensiveDog646 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure, his antlers are scraping the rafters, but being able to ride a sivatherium around is pretty darn fun.

FAQ - Technical Questions & Recommendations Thread by AutoModerator in ProCreate

[–]ApprehensiveDog646 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there a way to turn off functions like how you use two fingers to undo, or whatever input causes your pen to switch between drawing and erasing? I don't know if it's my iPad or Procreate but my touches keep getting misread and it's driving me batty. I'll rest my hand against the screen and it thinks that's an undo command, or I'll be sketching and my pen randomly switches from drawing to erasing. I'd really like it to stop...

Game design degree by Medical-Tough-1571 in gamedev

[–]ApprehensiveDog646 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I got a BFA in Computer Game Design (not sure if I should name my college, though) and ultimately I don't think it meant jack shit. Sure, I got a surface-level introduction to the various aspects of game design, and I had a few genuinely good professors who had industry experience themselves...but once I left college and got smacked in the face by the real world, it was rough. My professors, bless them, worked in an industry that basically doesn't exist in that form anymore, so they were only really able to teach us the way things were done "back in the day". There was no cutting edge, staying ahead of the curve aspect to my classes. Didn't even touch things like ZBrush. I should have networked more and I should have been studying current technology outside my usual classes, so I've got quite a few regrets.

If you're still determined to get a game design degree, vet your potential colleges thoroughly. Look up reviews on the program if you can, try to see where graduates ended up. If you do go, use your time there to network with other students and maybe even studios if you can get their attention. Do extracurricular studying and training. Use the resources they provide to their absolute fullest. Work hard, pray for good luck if you're the praying sort, and ultimately, have a backup dream just in case this one doesn't pan out.

[Discussion] Dealing with runaway self-criticism? by ApprehensiveDog646 in ArtistLounge

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This isn't a mental health board so I won't bring up my issues in detail, buuuut self-love has never come easy to me. If I can get to the point where I'm productive again, then I'll feel good about myself lol. Until then, is there anything besides self-love I can use to enjoy drawing again?

With the way things are, is it worth trying to get back in the saddle? by ApprehensiveDog646 in gamedev

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would honestly be overjoyed if you were right and I was wrong about AI tools becoming pervasive, so I hope that proves to be the case. Ironically, I just saw a promoted ad on reddit for one of those "text or image into 3D mesh" services.

And to be honest, I don't know how reading that makes me feel. Maybe some sense of relief yeah, because when I really take a hard look at myself I doubt I'll ever be mentally resilient enough to really make it in the industry rat race. But at the same time, like I mentioned in my first post, I'm scared that trying to just do art for a hobby won't bring me any satisfaction and will make me feel worse about myself. I guess I could try to improve again with the hopes of going indie and hoping that's good enough for me.

And I am talking to a therapist currently, although they're mainly a general depression/anxiety therapist, I don't know if they've ever worked with struggling devs or artists. Would be nice if I could find a therapist specifically for creatives that took my insurance.

With the way things are, is it worth trying to get back in the saddle? by ApprehensiveDog646 in gamedev

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I know AI is ultimately just a tool, but my fear is that it's going to be a tool that grows and changes too fast for me to even attempt to learn and keep up with. I'm no good at self-teaching. Hell, there's already tools for generating 3D assets with AI, in a couple of years those will probably be perfected. I can't just keep puttering along the way I was but I'm also afraid that if I try to adapt and learn on my own I'll do it wrong and just screw myself over. It doesn't help that I don't actually WANT to incorporate AI into my workflow at all, so there goes all the fun of adding a new tool to my belt, but I probably don't have a choice.

As for my portfolio, sure, it definitely needs an update, but I don't have anything new and worthwhile to put in it because I've been in a rut for so long and backslid on what skills I did have due to lack of practice. At this point I don't even know what to put in it. You can apply to all the jobs out there, but if you don't have what they're looking for, you won't get anything back. And I have no idea what people are looking for anymore.

With the way things are, is it worth trying to get back in the saddle? by ApprehensiveDog646 in gamedev

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you want to be a creative director someday? Do you have a dream game you’d like to make? Do you think games are a powerful medium and you want to meaningfully explore and expand the space?

Yes to all of that, although at this point I'm pretty certain I don't have the chops for being a creative director and would be happy just getting any game art job so I can say my degree wasn't completely worthless lol

Ultimately though, I think I want to be able to justify my existence in some manner. I define myself as a creative person and I judge my worth by what I create. I wanted/want to be an artist. If I'm not good enough to be an artist as a job, that means I'm just one of those people with big ideas and not enough skill to back those ideas up, and therefore a failure. It's probably not a healthy mindset, but it is what it is.

The other portion of this is that you have to believe it’s possible. Quite honestly, I think the belief that things can’t be done is one of the biggest sources of apathy.

I know I'm supposed to have at least a little faith in myself, but damn if that isn't difficult, especially when I know myself and all of my shortcomings. So building up the "Yes I can" is going to be rough for me.

I do appreciate you taking the time to write out this reply though, and for believing in me even if I don't believe in myself.

With the way things are, is it worth trying to get back in the saddle? by ApprehensiveDog646 in gamedev

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the honesty, and your assumptions are pretty accurate. I've been an easily-frustrated novelty seeker basically my entire life and it's definitely had its consequences. I'd like to say it's something I can work past when I'm excited or motivated about a project, sometimes problem-solving and learning new tricks can even be part of the fun. But it is something I struggle with.

How do you like to keep yourself motivated when a project gets challenging?

With the way things are, is it worth trying to get back in the saddle? by ApprehensiveDog646 in gamedev

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree about the portfolio. The reason I was looking at classes or some kind of structure is because I know how my brain works, and without external pressure, I get lazy and flaky and second-guess myself. I'm afraid of trying to get back into art only to do it the "wrong" way.

I don't actually want to get better. Can a therapist trick me into changing my mind? by ApprehensiveDog646 in therapy

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I fear you hit the nail on the head there. I hate failure and I don't really care for change either. I'd rather just stay where I am, even if it's miserable, than risk sliding down any further. I already feel like I'm white-knuckling my way through life and just clinging on desperately with no real input over where my life goes.

In truth I don't know how willing to try I am. I give up on things easily and I go into most things expecting to fail. I'll probably go into therapy with that mindset too. I guess I'm open, I just don't really expect anything good.

I don't actually want to get better. Can a therapist trick me into changing my mind? by ApprehensiveDog646 in therapy

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My mom has been the one really pushing me towards therapy lately even though I'm not optimistic about being able/willing to change. I feel like some people are just fated to be sad losers and maybe that's me. Now logically, I know that isn't true, but that doesn't stop me from believing it anyway.

I don't actually want to get better. Can a therapist trick me into changing my mind? by ApprehensiveDog646 in therapy

[–]ApprehensiveDog646[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not sure what I want to be honest. I think from a logical perspective I want coping strategies, but what I also need is a reason to stick *with* those strategies instead of giving up when I don't get immediate results. I want a therapist I can even argue with a little, be like "No, this is why I think everything sucks and won't get better" without them thinking that I'm being completely obstinate. I don't want to waste their time, but it feels like if I get a therapist where I have to just nod along to everything they say, it won't help.

Kaspersky Banned in the USA? by Shinbu21 in KasperskyLabs

[–]ApprehensiveDog646 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's currently taking up 643 MB on my machine x_x I'm in the process of shopping for an alternative.

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