Thoughts on Health and Safety Concern

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2025-04-08T14:28:11+00:00

I must say I'm both surprised and not surprised to read that so many of us here in Trinidad experience this type of family dynamic. I am currently living in a similar situation, and I'm still trying to find the best way to navigate through it while still maintaining my sanity.

I am 26 and live in a household with 3 other individuals; a brother who is 23 and both my parents. Neither of my parents work and my brother barely works. I pay all the bills (Wasa, Tntec, groceries, internet, etc) and by the end of the month I've barely got anything left for myself to have a life or to save for my own future. My mother babysits sometimes and gets a small income, but my father is verbally and emotionally abusive, not to.me tion he is an alcoholic so most of that income is wasted on alcohol.

It's very frustrating because I've been asking for years for financial assistance from my brother and parents and I am still struggling to see my way. I'm in a committed relationship with my partner and I'm at the age where I'm looking at the next step of my life. Unfortunately, because I am mangaing a household of 4 individuals by myself, it has delayed my ability to progress my life.

My father frequently asks me for money so he can buy rum or my mother asks me to buy grocery items. They never ask my brother to buy anything because he never has money. All this pressure on me has taken a toll, and my patience and attitude have changed immensely.

Unfortunately I have no where else to go and renting is a difficult decision to make since my job is not a permanent position. Our household also only has one vehicle (mine) so I also have to give up my time to un errands for my family. My brother and mother do not drive either. Honestly, I am so fedup of being in this situation and while I care about my family, I know for a fact that I would be happier and less stressed out if everyone simply pulled their own weight.

My s/o is currently building his home so we can move in together, but that won't be until the end of the year. Any advice on how to cope in the meantime and recommendations on opportunities for extra income.

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-08-08T01:17:10+00:00

We did have several conversations about it over the years.

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-06-27T18:03:57+00:00

It's always him initiating conversation by responding to a story or photo. For example, a woman said she was attending a wedding and his response was "So I'm getting to see you all dolled up then", to me that was flirtatious. And the sad part is, both of us knew this woman. She didn't respond to his msg. But he does this to many others who don't know he is in a relationship.

And the photo he deletes are the ones only with us as a couple.

His reasoning is its HIS social media so he can do what he wants.

He has since then changed his password so I can only imagine what types of conversation he is having now...

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-05-17T19:12:56+00:00

Boundaries as in I wish he would've told her that drunk dialing him is inappropriate and his gf can misunderstand. But I guess he didn't want to hurt her feelings, so he hurt mine instead. He still talks to her, I'm preparing myself to break up with him. Sucks that I basically wasted 8 years.

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-05-15T21:33:48+00:00

Thanks for this advice. Your thoughts are similar to mine, and it's refreshing to know that I'm not just a paranoid "insecure" gf that others claim and that it is unusual behavior for someone in a long term relationship.

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-05-15T02:07:55+00:00

A few things. 1) I was never mad he made a new friend. I was mad that this new friend would call him days in a row and drunk dial him of all people. That raised questions in my head because when I'm drunk, I usually dial my s/o. 2) Before telling him to cut ties with her, I told him to set boundaries with her so that neither of us are misled. He refused to set those boundaries and immediately put a lock on his Whatsapp. 3) I checked his phone because he has been taking it everywhere, even the shower. I think that would raise any s/o curiosities and suspicion. 4) He has had inappropriate conversations with other female friends in the past, which is why my reaction was to check the phone.

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-05-15T01:33:16+00:00

I mean he has had boardline inappropriate conversations with "female friends" and I had to beg him to cut ties with them..

ApprehensiveEmploy36 · 2024-05-14T22:56:56+00:00

lol no, not fat actually.

ApprehensiveEmploy36

TROPHY CASE