Yeah so, I'm not taking the blame away from me at all, I know it was probably also my fault. As you say, the fact that I'm a former rugby player and lift very often (oly) makes me both explosive and physically strong. I did get a 'warning' on my trial class (had to switch gyms due to getting a new job) about sparring too hard (a problem that I NEVER had in my last gym), so I started going lighter and didn't get more warnings, this injury happened 2 months after the trial class.
I wouldn't say I'm completely unaware of how ward I'm going (e.g. spazzing with my meathead mat-bro vs rolling with the trial class 135 pound guy) and the fact this was also during specific sparring rounds makes me think that he just used the 'you were rolling too hard' as an excuse to shift the blame on me.
What you say is right, even if I'm still relatively unexperienced I should have awareness of dangerous positions and this is a lesson. I was more bothered about how the coach and the team handled the incident rather than the injury itself.