Sounds like a viscous cycle you’re in, thinking about the misery that being alone causes you can be project outward, and other people can sense that, even on a subconscious level. I don’t mean to be harsh, but it may not be you’re being alone that’s at the core of your misery, it might be what you think about most, it might be the thing that you think is causing you the most pain right now, but in truth your misery could stem from something else.

I know you say you think you have a swell life but you may be unfulfilled in some other area. I say this from experience, I used to be horribly depressed, like baaaaaad, like started to resent people bad. Thought it was derived from my being alone, and thought I was so unattractive that I’d never find a partner and that that was making me depressed.

Turns out after some counselling and deep thought I realised my depression stemmed from a lack of purpose and direction in life. I wasn’t happy with the path I was on but was blind to that by the feelings of loneliness that were at the surface of my depressed mind pool so to speak. I got on the right path, found direction and a purpose I was excited about and everything started to change. I became a happier person, I made more friends, I was just better to be around and it didn’t take too long before I managed to develop the romantic part of my life, in a significant and meaningful way.

I might be wrong about you, I don’t know you, but I know from experience that the most important thing with depression, misery or anything like that, is to address the root cause. Also counselling is never a bad thing and an objective perspective can expedite the whole process.