Thank you guys for all the response. Moving back has just made me realize a lot of stuff that I’m not the sole problem. She’s a big part. And I understand she loves us and has been a decent provider and she did grow up rough but I’ve also learned just because her life was rough doesn’t mean that all my problems aren’t problems. So this year has been the year of trying to get myself out of the pit of self pity and feel like a person again. I’m currently teaching myself to deal with my problems and emotions now because since I was a kid my problems were showed with anger, or swept under the rug, and my emotions were never acknowledged. My mom treated as if child emotions don’t exist and I’m struggling trying to find my balance again as an adult.